Aug 31 2009 Fire Hazard: The Wrist Mounted Flamethrower
If you've been reading long enough, you may recall Everett Bradford's Pyro System from early last year. Well now Everett is back with the Pyro System 2.2. Basically, it's a bunch of 3rd degree burns waiting to happen. Ever seen a man melt his own face off before? I have, but only because I was tired of shaving. Suck it, electrolysis!
Thanks to Ethan, Jeff and Matty, who all have flamethrowers mounted on their bikes so you won't follow too close behind. Also, they just look cool.
Apr 14 2009 Dangerously Delicious: The BA-K-47
The BA-K-47 is a full size replica of an AK-47 made out of bacon (and wire). Quick, put it in my mouth and pull the trigger! Mmmm, lardy!
We had our first annual Bacon Day this past Saturday. As a huge fan of bacon, and all the great bacon blogs out there, I decided it was time for me to make my own bacon creation. I came up with the BA-K-47, a 1:1 scale AK-47 made out of bacon. It took a total of eight hours to create, a lot of bacon, and a blowtorch... oh yeah, and our good friend beer helped too.
ZOMG -- you know beer too?! The trouble that guy and I used to get into! Like yesterday when he told me to steal my neighbor's car and drive it into a ravine! And right now when he told me to type that despite on ongoing investigation. Hold on, door.
UPDATE: COPS -- DAMN YOU BEER!
UPDATE: You know I didn't mean that. Now get over here and give daddy a little sippy-sippy.
Hit the jump for a whole bunch more.
Dec 26 2008 Cell Phone Goes PEW PEW PEW PEW
Remember the cell phone gun that Italian police found in a raid on the mafia? Turns out they're mad popular in Europe. And, I've got to tell ya, I'd almost be fooled if it looked like a Blackberry and not a phone from the 90's -- the 1890's (note to self: fact check 19th century cell phone technology). Some guy ranting about the pieces of shit:
Most see airport security as a pain. Some deal better than others. Some feel violated, when you watch this movie, you'll understand why they want your cell phone through the x-ray machine. If you get asked to test your cell phone at the airport, this is the reason. Because cell phone guns have arrived. These phones are not in the U.S. yet, but they are in use overseas. Beneath the digital phone face is a 22 caliber handgun capable of firing four rounds in rapid succession using the standard telephone keypad. European law enforcement officials are stunned by the discovery of these deadly decoys. They say phone guns are changing the rules of engagement in Europe. Be patient if security asks to look at your cell phone or turn it on to show that it works. They have a good reason! Welcome to our NEW WORLD!!
New world? Would that be a brave new world? And, if so, hook me up with some of that soma! Oh yeah, that's the stuff. Now, who wants to hit up the feelies?
Video Demo of Cellphone Gun Shows How Effective It Could Be [gizmodo]
Nov 17 2008 Oooh, Nice Ride: The New Presidential Limo
General Motors, best known for their delicious line of breakfast cereals, has designed an all new presidential limo for when Barack Obama takes power next year. They were going to do it four years ago, but figured, f*** it, let's focus our efforts on going belly-up for awhile. Anyway, the car.
Most of the specs of this car are top secret, but a few tantalizing details are floating around, such as the five-inch-thick windows that are about half as transparent as regular glass and can stop projectiles from assault rifles, rocket-propelled grenades and high explosives. It's also said to be built of a combination of blast-proof ceramics and exotic metals, and certainly won't have a convertible top or sunroof. While GM's trying to make it look like a Cadillac DTS, it's based on the company's line of heavy-duty 2500 trucks.
Top secret specs my ass. I'll tell you all about this thing: It runs on a rocket engine powered by the tar-like blood of terrorists. It can also hover. Comes complete with dinosaur chauffeur who doubles as sexual masseuse should you hit rush-hour traffic. AM/FM radio. Four tires and spare donut in the trunk. Mini-bar. Wicked two-tone paintjob. Left and right turn signals. Bomb proof undercarriage. 7MPG city/13 highway. A real pussy magnet. I'm serious -- the CIA stole my blueprints.
Obama's new presidential limo is built like a tank, looks like a Cadillac [dvice]
Jul 8 2008 Shooting Simulator: Use Your Own Gun
The ST-2 indoor shooting simulator is just the thing you need if you thought Duck Hunt was the awesomest game ever when you were a kid. They system is currently being used by the Russian and Slovakian shooting teams in preparation for the Olympics, and I want one installed in my basement. It's advertised as the "first simulator for shotgun and rifle shooting designed specifically for demanding users such as shooting instructors" and gives you feedback explaining what you did wrong should you miss a shot. You know, stuff like, "you have shitty aim", and "you were distracted by the couple having sex in the bushes". Which is a bad idea. Because one time I tried playing Duck Hunt with daddy's gun and accidentally shot stepmommy while she was vacuuming.
ST-2 shooting simulator keeps your aim sharp [engadget]
Thanks to Julian, who I've head can dissolve an entire urinal cake with a single urination.
Feb 11 2008 The Hello Kitty AR-15 Is Just So Damn Cute
A man modded an AR-15 with a custom paintjob to produce one of the cutest guns I've ever seen -- the Hello Kitty AR-15. As you can see it's pink and looks really good. But only in a "I'm totally secure with my manliness" kind of way. And to prove myself I just bit the head off a squirrel. See, all man damnit. That being said, I'm going to start sleeping with one of these instead of my old stuffed bear. Which, incidentally, is a grizzly I choked to death with my bare hands.
Several more pictures after the jump, including a break down and some firing shots.
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