Nov 18 2009 Why Don't House Cats Grow Into Lions?
This is a clever answer to a query posed in Yahoo! Answers. You can't argue the answerer didn't give them exactly what they asked for, even if it's not what they wanted. Because, let's face it, a lot of people don't even know what they want. I'm looking at you, Mrs.Takes 8 Minutes To Order at the Taco Bell Drive Thru. Next time I'm ramming!
Thanks to TARDISlover, who likes it bigger on the inside.
Oct 14 2009 More Spork Art: This Time A Human Carcass!
After yesterday's Plasticdragon, loyal Geekologie Reader Ashley wrote to inform me that he and his art group recently created a similar figure. Except, instead of a dragon, it's a dead-ass body!
This is a piece we did at Uni early this year and I just saw your feature article on the plastic dragon. The skeleton has been getting some nice features so thought you might be interested! :) It was a comment on the ironic contrast between our disposable fast-food culture and the problem of world famine. This received a D&AD Commendation at the '09 Awards.
Well done, Ashley. I'd like to take this time to point out that I, for one, am 100% against world famine. Now I know that I usually try to avoid getting political, but I firmly believe that all people should eat food. Except the fatties. They should exercise.
Hit the jump for three closeups.
Continue Reading " More Spork Art: This Time A Human Carcass! "
Sep 28 2009 McDomination: Map Of McDonalds In The US
This is a graphic representation of all the McDonalds restaurants in the United States. As you might be able to tell, there are a lot of them. Some might even say a McMillion. But they'd be wrong, because there's only 13,000.
This map is the brainchild of Stephen Von Worley, who got to thinking about the strip malls sprawling out along I-5 in California's ever less rural Central Valley: "Just how far can you get from generic convenience? And how would you figure that out?"
There are over 13,000 McDonald's restaurants in the US, or about 1 for every 23,000 Americans. But even market penetration this advanced doesn't mean that McDonald's is everywhere. Somewhere in South Dakota is the McFarthest Spot, the place in the US geographically most removed from the nearest McD's (*). If you started out from this location, a few miles north of State Highway 20 (which runs latitudinally between Highways 73 in the west and 65 in the east), you'd have to drive 145 miles to get your Big Mac (if you could fly, however, it'd be only 107 miles).
So you think the folks in Bumfack, South Dakota, are any skinnier than the rest of the population? Because I bet not. And no, this isn't me endorsing fast food. But one time I did find two onion rings in my fries at Burger King. Yeah, so who's the real king now? Gimme that crown, bitch!
413 - The McFarthest Place: 145 Mi to the Nearest Big Mac [strangemaps]
Thanks to Edminster and twellve, who only go to McDonalds when McRibs are in season.
Sep 4 2009 Questionable Darth Vader McDonald's Ad
This is a European ad for McDonald's in which an upset looking Darth Vader force-floats his food in front of himself while a curly haired guy sucks face with a pale hooker in a back booth. It is all part of McDonald's new 'Come as you are' campaign, which, if I'm not mistaken, is Nirvana inspired. Not unlike the McDonald's/Nirvana mashup I've been working on, 'Big Mac-Shaped Box'. No? 'Smells Like Special Sauce?' Ooh -- ooh! -- 'The Man Who Sold the Burgers'!
No Wonder Darth Vader Has Such a Bad Attitude [gizmodo]
Thanks to The Baroness, far too classy for fast food.
Sep 3 2009 How To Rob An Apple Store In 31 Seconds
Just like this. IN 31 seconds the thieves made off with 23 Macbook Pro's, 14 iPhones and 9 iPod Touch. Wow. And did anybody else find it annoying how the reporter was speaking during the video? "Watch again as the thieves show skilled practice at bringing down that plate glass door. And savvy enough to wear masks knowing there would be surveillance cameras ALL OVER THE PLACE." Skilled practice, really? THEY THREW A BRICK THROUGH A GLASS DOOR. "Savvy enough to wear masks"? Jesus, it's not like they trained pigeons to rob the store, they tied bandannas around their faces and this guy thinks they're criminal masterminds.
How to Rob an Apple Store [buzzfeed]
Thanks to Greg, Gino, Sarah and The Superficial Writer, who could have done it in 29 seconds AND snagged a couple iPhone cases.
Aug 22 2009 Chicken Buns: KFC's New WTF Sandwich
KFC just released a new sandwich called the Double Down that features bacon and cheese IN BETWEEN TWO CHICKEN FILLET BUNS. Because, seriously, bread is just filler anyways. A recent review:
That's it? That is the sandwich? That's not worth five dollars. Oh... oh my God. That is the best thing ever. I don't know what "Colonel's Sauce" is, but it is like a party in my mouth. This is completely worth the five dollars. Unfortunately I'm going to end up weighing 700 lbs after this, but it is simply amazing.
Wow, I kind of absolutely don't want to try that. But I will tell you a chicken joke I came up with last night.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To nug-get to the other side. HIYO! I should do stand up.
Hit the jump for an actual product shot and a commercial.
May 11 2009 World's Smallest Cheeseburger Combo Meal
This is the world's smallest (and cutest) combo meal. It consists of a little cheeseburger with all the fixins, a very small fry, and a miniscule soda. It's all real too. Hit the jump to see just how small it is (burger is about 1" round), along with a link to more pictures of its making. No word on what kind of children's toy was included, but, if I had to guess, a choking hazard. Get it? Because it's so small. AAAAH, I DON'T GET IT EITHER!
Hit it lest you end up looking like Governer L. Phatt from LeChuck's Revenge. Monkey Island reference? MONKEY ISLAND REFERENCE! Who loves you?
Continue Reading " World's Smallest Cheeseburger Combo Meal "
Mar 4 2009 Woman Calls 911 Over McNugget Emergency
NOTE: Video consists of the calls to 911.
Not once. Not twice. But three times did Latreasa Goodman call 911 about the lack of McNuggets at her local McDonald's and the manager's unwillingness to give her a refund.
When cops responded to the restaurant, Goodman told them, "This is an emergency. If I would have known they didn't have McNuggets, I wouldn't have given my money, and now she wants to give me a McDouble, but I don't want one." Goodman noted, "I called 911 because I couldn't get a refund, and I wanted my McNuggets," according to the below Fort Pierce Police Department report. That logic, however, did not keep cops from citing Goodman for misusing the 911 system. Even after being issued a misdemeanor citation, Goodman contended, "this is an emergency, my McNuggets are an emergency."
I'm with you, Latreasa -- McNuggets ARE an emergency. I've nearly killed cashiers for less. Like that time they told me the McFlurry machine was broken -- I was over the counter and had dude's hand in a deep fryer before you could say Value Meal.
A McNuggets "Emergency" [thesmokinggun]
Thanks to Jason and Tank, who have both called 911 because they didn't get the toys they wanted their Happy Meals.
