Jan 16 2009 Not Impressed, And I Typically LOVE Elf Ears

The Gelfin Ear Tip is a brass (not even gold!) piece of jewelry made to insert into an ear piercing so you can look like an idiot. And trust me folks, I'm not saying that to be rude -- I freaking love a good looking elf-ear. This just isn't one of them. And especially not for $260 per ear. You're better off just cutting your ears and spraypainting them gold. Which is exactly what I did two days ago. That's right -- and from now on you will only refer to me as Findecáno Calmcacil, the Elf King of Geekologie. Also, I think the ear infection has spread to my brain.

UPDATE: Whew, false alarm -- just a little gold spraypaint in my blood-alcohol stream. I'm pissing riches!

Bijules NYC "Gelfin Ear Tip" [highsnobette]

Thanks to Amanda, who, unlike you guys, doesn't need elf ears to turn me on.

Dec 11 2008 Love: A Zelda Cosplay Girls Gallery *Swoon*

By now all you regulars know about my affinity for Zelda. And for you newcomers: I have an affinity for Zelda. So what better way to share my love of the princess than to, uh, post a bunch of pictures of chicks dressed as Link? I know, I'm confused too. But that hasn't stopped these amorous feelings. I'm especially digging the tall one in green on the left. I freaking love a chick that's cool not shaving her legs. RAWR!

Hit the jump for a ton more of the two in red and blue, who are actually chicks, I swear.

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Aug 8 2008 Yes! DIY Elf Ears: No Experience Required

We've posted elf ears before here on Geekologie, but those involved some sort of "surgical procedure" and "money". Well now there's an Instructable on how to do it yourself with the help of a friend! Okay, not really. The article just discusses the things to consider if you're interested in getting it done. So, I'll go ahead and post the DIY myself.

1. Find a pair of scissors. The sharper the better. The scissors you have from kindergarten should be fine.
2 Score some rubbing alcohol. Take a few shots.
3. Ask yourself, "Do I really want elf ears?" If the answer is no, repeat step 2, possibly alternating shots and bong hits.
4. Cut a triangular chunk out of your upper ear. You should be bleeding at this point.
5. Sterilize a needle with a lighter, thread with fishing line or yarn, and sew your ear back together in the desired shape.
6. Put some tape around your ear to hold it together and prevent strain on the stitches.
7. Repeat steps 4 through 6 for the other ear.
8. Take a picture, preferably topless.
9. If you are a chick, send me that picture. If you are a dude, throw it away, I don't care about your elf ears.
10. If you are hot, I will marry you.
11. Change your name to Zelda.

Hit the jump for a few more pictures, including some after they've healed a bit.

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Jul 31 2008 Amazing: Wooden Mechanical Motion Machine

This is a video of an all wooden machine made by a 70-year old man named Del who may or may not be Santa Claus. It contains absolutely no metal whatsoever and displays virtually ever method of mechanical motion, all in a single machine. Sure it doesn't actually do anything, but who cares, it's freaking awesome. Santa even used a variety of different wood to make the thing, including: maple, black walnut, pine, oak, cherry, hickory, and morning. Well done! I've been good this year Santa, and I'm thinking this is what I want for Christmas. And, if it's not too much trouble, one of your female elves. Pointier the ears, the better.

Youtube

Thanks Skyler, now let's build one out of marshmallows.

Jun 19 2008 OLD: Even The Ancient Romans Played D & D

An ancient Roman gaming die went up for auction at Christie's recently. Per the description:

A ROMAN GLASS GAMING DIE

Circa 2nd Century A.D.
Deep blue-green in color, the large twenty-sided die incised with a distinct symbol on each of its faces
2 1/16 in. (5.2 cm.) wide

Several polyhedra in various materials with similar symbols are known from the Roman period. Modern scholarship has not yet established the game for which these dice were used.

Stupid modern scholars. I mean really. They were playing D & D you f***wits. Gary Gygax had a time machine, yo.

Auction Page

Thanks Kristina, lets get together and play D20 Yahtzee sometime

Mar 6 2008 Zelda Girl Seeking Link On Craigslist, I'm In

Some girl who says she looks like Princess Zelda is looking for her soulmate Link on Craigslist.

Hi, I know thats strange one. I want a guy who looks like link. from the game. I thought to myself that I might as well be honest. I look like zelda, so why not ask for it? who knows.. I know theres a guy like that. So if you think you look like link, the blonde skater cut, and light eyes look email me. Im a simple chick who loves zelda. I know thats a corney one to ask but heck we might as well be honest as to what we like? am I right? I want a guy like that and a guy who is romantic and believes in chilvary, love, old school ways, and doesnt have a problem with european culture. Thanks a bunch!!! If I like you, and you have a pic, ill email you back. PS I WILL NOT RESPOND to guys without FACE SHOTS. period. Thankyou for understanding. Im not a body chick. more a face and Please only guys 30 and below. And please do not email me rude comments... this world has too many jerks and I delete them and report to the authorities. Its extreme I know But please have respect.

Wow, I'm in love. Just look at those ears. You think they're real? I hope so. My only question is what Link she's looking for. Because if she's looking for the original Legend of Zelda Link then I'm so in. I'm a dead ringer for a little pixelated turd in a green tunic. But if she's looking for more of an Ocarina of Time Link then I'm screwed. And if she's looking for wolf Link from Twilight Princess then she's really f***ed in the head.

A closeup of her picture in stunning crap quality, after the jump.

Continue Reading " Zelda Girl Seeking Link On Craigslist, I'm In "