Jul 22 2009 TASER TASER TASER!: New Taser Shoots Three Probes For Zapping Multiple Perps

The TASER X3 is just that, a taser that shoots three separate probes for shocking several victims at once. Or, fire them all into one perp and watch that sucker light up like a Christmas tree!

The new weapon will be officially unveiled on July 27th, but in anticipation of that glorious day, TASER has kindly posted an employee demonstration video of shooting three entirely underpaid women in the back, to the applause of onlookers.

Yes, women. And yes, the guy yells TASER TASER TASER before blasting them all. Which, apparently, is the cool thing to do. Now I'm not saying I could have taken all three shots and still been standing, but I totally could have. Hell, I could have probably taken five. No, ten. Twenty! GIMME THE CHAIR!

Triple-shot TASER X3 imminent, deranged employees celebrate with mock executions [engadget]

Thanks to Julian and michelle, who could take like fifteen shots and still punch you in the face.

Jun 22 2009 Girl Electrocutes Herself Tweeting In Bathtub

Following in the trend of tweeting from the bathroom, a 17-year old Romanian girl died while apparently trying to Twitter from the tub (this new loofah feels great!).

The Austrian times says that Maria Barbu was, in fact, in the tub while using Twitter when she likely reached to plug in her charger with a wet hand, electrocuting herself in the process.

As much fun as I do want to make of Maria, you really can't blame her. Women understanding electricity? BWHAHAH AHAH HA HA! God, I needed that.

Girl Dies by Electrocution While Twitting in Bathtub, Apocalypse Draws Nearer [gizmodo]

Thanks to Julian, who once showered with a toaster but the bread got all soggy.

Apr 10 2009 BA-BOOSH!: More Volcano Lightning Action

I don't actually know if that's the sound volcano lightning makes, but for the sake of my journalistic integrity, let's run with it.

When Alaska's Mount Redoubt volcano began rumbling back to life in January, a team of researchers scrambled to set up a system called a Lightning Mapping Array that would be able to peer through the dust and gas of any eruption that occurred to the lightning storm happening within. Lightning is known to flash in the tumultuous clouds belched out during volcanic eruptions.

The lightning produced when Redoubt finally erupted on March 22 was "prolific," said physicist Paul Krehbiel of New Mexico Tech.

Cool. Not as dramatic as last year's Chaitén volcano eruption, but this one does have a smiley face in the lightning. Can you see it? It's there on the right. Kind of looks like a giant monkey head....
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THEY'VE FOUND MONKEY ISLAND!

Dramatic Image Shows Volcano's Lightning [livescience]

Thanks to Watch, who once punched a cloud in the face and made it cry rain. True story.