Feb 5 2009 The Pocket Shark: Not Mightier Than A Sword, But Could Still Put An Attacker's Eye Out

The Pocket Shark is a $7 pen that doubles as a weapon thanks to its rugged construction.

For starters, it's made from the glass-reinforced plastic, Grivory, the same tough material we use in our NIGHTSHADE SERIES (of knives), and features walls that are 4 times thicker than similar markers. This means it's built for impact and, in a self-defense emergency it can become an efficient Yawara stick for driving off an attacker. Plus, the screw-top cap will stay in place and won't pop off like a regular marker's cap would when you strike a percussion blow, or when obtaining joint locks or submission holds.

ZOMG! One minute I'm thinking, "yes, that marker does looks sturdy", and next thing you know they're talking about "percussion blows" and "submission holds". Well, I guess as long as the cap doesn't come off while I'm braining some poor sap. Hey, Superficial Writer -- come check out this pen trick I just learned!

UPDATE: Jesus, who the hell brings nunchucks to work?

Pocket Shark Isn't Your Average Marker [ohgizmo]

Thanks to Mikey, who may or may not be a pocket pool shark.

Dec 4 2008 Annoy Coworkers With The Annoyatron 2.0

The Annoyatron 2.0 is a little gadget that makes annoying noises at random so you can drive a very special coworker to the point of stabbing you and/or stealing your lunch from the communal fridge. The sounds are as follows:

-15kHz (Mosquito tone) (full volume)
-Cricket chirping (medium/low volume)
-IM Doorbell (low volume)
-Grating Electronic noise (full volume)
-Typical Electronic Beep (medium volume)

Just hide the little board in somebody's office, don your stab-proof jacket, and wait for the insanity to set in! Don't have a stab-proof jacket? Well you're in luck -- I happen to be selling them! They may just look like garbage bags, but you have The Geekologie Writer's personal guarantee they are real garbage bags.

Annoy-a-tron 2.0 Lets You to Slowly Drive Your Co-Workers Insane Just for Fun [gizmodo]

Thanks to 42 y/o undead warlock, who doesn't need an Annoyatron, because he's got warlock powers and shit.