Nov 17 2009
Welcome To The Gun Laser Show: Girl Shows Off Her 'Pew Pew' Tattoos
This is a photo taken by Flickr user Meow Cely of a girl with 'pew pew' tattooed across her fingers. I must admit, I admire her dedication to the pews. You don't see me rocking any pew-y ink (except in THIS post), and I'm one of the the laser blaster's biggest proponents. Funny story: I went to a gun and knife show a few weeks ago and demanded my entrance fee be returned when I found out there weren't any laser guns. Also, I accidentally cut myself with a bowie knife and tried to play it off like I'd been stabbed.
Flickr
via
(Geek) Thug Life!: Pew Pew Tattoo [greatwhitesnark]
Sep 24 2009 Remove The Knuckles And The Fingers Will Die: Hardcore Zombie Tattoo
Wait, so does that mean he IS a zombie? Beause it doesn't say '#1 zombie slaya', it just says 'zombie'. Who knows, maybe he didn't have enough fingers for all that. Or brains. Get it? Zombie joke!
Thanks to Emma, who once brained a zombie with a frying pan and didn't even lose the eggs she was cooking. Over-easy, Emma.
Sep 12 2009 Scratch Meeeeee!: Super Mario Fingernails
This is somebody's false fingernails that photobucket user nailchick27 painted with a Super Mario Bros. 3 theme. As you can see, they're good looking. I can't say for certain I'd date a girl with nails like that (because I wouldn't), but I would let her give me a back scratch. Harder. Go on, harder. HARDER. DO IT TILL YOU SEE RIBS! Now smoke a rack, I'm getting hungry.
Hit the jump for one more shot of the whole set.
Continue Reading " Scratch Meeeeee!: Super Mario Fingernails "
Sep 11 2009 Lookin' Bad: Bluetooth Ringphone Concept
Who the hell would actually want to talk to their hand like in the picture is beyond me (where do I sign up?), but Argentinian design team BCK designed this set of rings to use as a Bluetooth headset handset. Also, anybody else notice how the thumb above the ring was drawn in, and the pinky looks like it was torn off and sewn back on by Dr. Frankenstein? I wish mine looked like that.
The user talks to the hand using the yellow ring that fits halfway down the little finger, and then listens with the pink ring on the thumb.
This is one concept that probably won't catch on, ever. Unless you can make a display to put on the palm. Maybe there is some alternate reality where this technology came into fruition.One ring to hear your calls,One ring to talk in,
Two rings to take your calls,
and with the Bluetooth bind them.
BWAAHAHAHAHAHA. A Lord of the Rings themed poem, that's too precious. See what I did there? See how I snuck the precious right on in there? Jesus I should teach lessons about being awesome.
Bluetooth Concept turns your finger phone into reality [alphabetatricks]
Thanks to Cinema Obsessed, who isn't obsessed with movies so much as the popcorn.
Mar 28 2009 'David After The Dentist' Shirt From ThinkGeek
Remember David after the dentist? He was cute, wasn't he? He was. That's because drugs make people cute. And sometimes, their faces melt. It's true, one time at a concert I saw a bus turn into an accordion and Dracula fighting a dinosaur by the concession stand. It was super erotic. Anyway, get your own 'I have two fingers' shirt from ThinkGeek for $16-$18, depending on your size. Also, if if anybody knows where I can score some itrous-nay ide-oxay, that would be cool tool. Ha, did I just say cool tool? Yeah, and I meant it.
Thanks to killerabbit, who has four fingers.
Mar 15 2009 Guy Loses Finger, Replaces With Flash Drive
Jerry Jalava is a hacker who lost half his left ring finger in a motorcycle accident and decided to replace the digit with a USB drive. So now he sports a rubber half-finger with thumb(!)drive inside. Awesome. Plus, if he ever has to wear a wedding ring it won't count because it's not a real finger. Am I right? Because that's why I cut mine off. Just kidding, I was really high and trying to make a bong in shop class.
Hit the jump for three more shots of the digital digitry.
Continue Reading " Guy Loses Finger, Replaces With Flash Drive "
Feb 25 2009 Excessive Gaming Can Cause Skin Sores
That's right folks, too much gaming can give you the stink-palm, according to a recent article in the British Journal of Dermatology. Of course, the disorder (Playstation palmar hidradenitis) may be based entirely on the single case of a 12-year old girl.
Doctors who examined her at the Geneva University Hospital concluded she had a condition known as 'idiopathic eccrine hidradenitis', a skin disorder that generally causes red, sore lumps on the palms of the hands and soles of the feet.
The doctors suspect that the problem was caused by tight and continuous grasping of the console's hand-grips, and repeated pushing of the buttons, alongside sweating caused by the tension of the game.
The unsightly lumps went away after 10 days of gaming abstinence. Now listen folks: if reddened palms are the only negative effect of your excessive gaming, be thankful. After all, you've still got your social life, right? Right?
Game consoles 'cause skin sores' [bbcnews]
Thanks to Shelley, Becky, JMR and Tank, who have no fear of developing Playstation palmar hidradenitis because they only play XBox.
Feb 19 2009 Guy Loses Finger To Neodymium Magnets
What you're looking at there is a dude's fingernail and the remains of a finger that got crushed between two Neodymium magnets. Brutal! Sweet!
Dirk had an accident. It took 1 1/2 hours of surgery to remove the shattered bones and repair the damage. Medically speaking, he crushed his right index finger distal phalange. The magnets had a 50 cm (20 inch) separation when they decided to fly together.
He is lucky that he only lost a finger tip as opposed to his whole hand. The block Neo below is about 4" by 2" by 2" N45 with a pull force of around 700 lbs (320 kg). The disk is about 3" dia. by 2 1/2" thick N45 with a pull force of about 400 lbs (180 kg). That is his fingernail and some of his finger tip caught between the magnets.
Holy hellfire. Hit the jump to see the graphic photos and a link to the whole story. Which amazingly didn't include heavy drinking and/or a bet. Seriously though, Neodymium magnets are not playtoys (unless you got the really small weak ones, in which case, whee!). Remember what they taught you in Boy Scouts: if you can't stand the heat, too many chefs spoil the broth. Life wisdom, folks, I'm full of it.
Hit the jump for graphic pictures of a bloody stump.
Feb 5 2009 Baby Born With 12 Developed Fingers, Toes
Kamani Hubbard was recently born with 12 fully developed (and functional) fingers and toes. I'm jealous -- I was born with a nubbin next to my left pinky and they cut it off at birth. But the nipple on my back is still there. Nice one, doc.
"It's merely an interesting and beautiful variation rather than a worrisome thing," said Dr. Michael Treece and St. Luke's Hospital Pediatrician. "I would be tempted to leave those fingers in place. I realize children would tease each other over the slightest things, and having extra digits on each hand is more than slight. But imagine what sort of a pianist a 12-fingered person would be. Imagine what sort of a flamenco guitarist. If nothing else, think of their typing skills."
"I just want him to see what greatness will be in store for him," said the baby's proud father.
Greatness, huh -- like being an illustrious blogger? I AM TEH L337 P4WNR OF INTERWEBZ!
A couple more pictures of the mad digits after the jump.
Continue Reading " Baby Born With 12 Developed Fingers, Toes "
Jan 23 2009 Help Prevent Carpal Tunnel With Awethumb!
This video is chock-full of slanderous lies and half-truths about the dangers of texting in an attempt to sell you little plastic thimbles to slip on your thumbs when using your cell phone. I'm only posting it because 1. I can't believe these pieces of shit and 2. I just love hearing the guy say "AWETHUMB!", particularly at 0:22 and the very end. $11.50 gets you "2 Small & 2 Large Awethumbs and a Microfiber Storage Pouch that Doubles as a Cleaning Cloth". $18.50 gets you everything mentioned above and an Awethumb handjob.
Product Page
Thanks to Mother B, who doesn't need Awethumbs, because they're stupid.
Jan 20 2009 Guy Gets Arm Replaced Luke Skywalker Style
Evan Reynolds, 19, got his hand and part of his arm ripped off in a car accident and has since been fitted with an i-LIMB, a robotic hand developed by an Apple/Star Wars fanboy.
The i-Limb was developed by a Scottish company, Touch Bionics, and has won awards for its innovative technology. The total cost including the hand itself and the fitting is about £30,000.
"It's so sensitive I can grip a bottle of water or a paper cup without crushing it, and even swing a racket. All I have to so is imagine picking something up or gripping it and the fingers and thumb move automatically."Mr Reynolds said his disability has not stopped him playing sport, his greatest passion, nor has it crushed his spirit.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for fake arms and shit, but I'd still be pissed if Evan could throw the ball better than me. And that, dear reader, is only one of the thousands of reasons why I'm going to spend eternity in hell with a piece of glowing charcoal in my ass.
Bionic hand gives student new lease of life [telegraph]
Thanks to MoMan, who fears the day his robotic prosthetic turns on him and rips his penis off.
Dec 17 2008 I Am Stupid, These Are Better iPhone Gloves
Okay, so apparently that last pair of gloves I posted for using touchscreen devices suck because your fingers get all cold. Boy was that a stupid product design. But apparently these DOTS gloves will still work AND keep your digits nice and toasty. They work via those magical little dots on the tips of the fingers. A knit pair will set you back $15, wool $20. Despite contacting the company, I received no word on what the dots are actually made of, which begs the question -- angel nipples?
Thanks to egleaves and David for pointing out that the other gloves are for nose-pickers, not iPhoners.
Dec 15 2008 Are You Even Surprised?: iPhone Gloves
The $23 Etre Touchy gloves are handwear designed for using your iPhone or other touchscreen device in the harsh months of winter. They're just gloves with the index fingers and thumbs cut off. Which *SPOILER ALERT* you can do yourself to any pair of gloves, even $5 ones. Ha, but not while you're wearing them you stupid idiot!
Etre Touchy gloves won't let winter spoil your texting fun [dvice]
Oct 29 2008 Circular Saw Won't Cut Fingers, Hot Dogs
The SawStop is a circular saw designed to prevent you from cutting all your fingers off. Personally, I think fingers are overrated.
The blade carries a small electrical charge. This charge is continuously monitored by a digital signal processor. When contact is made, the human body absorbs some of the charge, causing the voltage to drop. The drop in voltage triggers a quick release aluminum break. A heavy duty spring forces the brake into the teeth of the spinning blade. The teeth dig into the aluminum, stopping the blade cold. The blade's momentum forces it to retract below the table, and the motor is automatically shut off.
Wow, that's great. Except in the video, they only use hot dogs. If it works so well, why not use a real finger? F*** it, I say the inventor put his junk on line.
Thanks to Jeff, who makes beans & weenies the old fashioned way, with a table saw.
Oct 28 2008 Tuttuki Bako (aka The Fingerbang Game)
Tuttuki Bako is a new video game where a player interacts with the device by sticking their finger in a hole. Your finger then appears on the LCD screen, and you can make contact with the characters in the game. If you can even call this a game -- all I saw was some chick fingerbanging a plastic box. Which was totally awesome in its own right. And its own wrong. Mostly wrong. Still, I think we can all agree that by the time you read this you've already considered sticking your penis in it.
Hit the jump for two more game videos.
Jun 5 2008 Self-Stirring Coffee Mug For The Fingerless
Are you a lazy bastard or a shop teacher that's had ten accidents? If so, this self stirring mug may be for you. The mugs are made by Gevalia, a company best known for convincing me to sign up for their coffee of the month club through the use of a well placed late-night infomercial featuring a sexy saleswoman with a sultry voice. Anyway, the $19 mug features a special base that runs on two AAA batteries and promises "to gently stir your beverage at the push of a button". Now call me crazy, but what kind of gentle stir creates a freaking whirlpool in your beverage? That picture looks like a blender set on the highest setting. You'd have hot beverage in your lap quicker than you could say "I'm suing you McDonalds because I'm a stupid asshole and the coffee you served me was hot." Still, I'm buying one. Mostly because, unlike that pussy James Bond, I like my martinis stirred -- and served in 12-ounce mugs. Suck it Bond, you couldn't even spy on your own girlfriend in the shower.
Stir Mug Does All Of The Work For You [ohgizmo]
Jun 4 2008 Handwrench Is A Real Hand Wrench, But Not A Real Hand, Or A Real Practical Wrench
This is the Handwrench by designer Paul Julius Martus. It's a hand wrench, with a little hand on the end. BWAHAH HA HA HA! Some people, so clever. I'm pretty sure it's just an art piece though, seeing how your little fingers would probably break off if you were trying to bust a real serious nut loose. Still, Paul gets clever points for being clever with the little hand. But I get 2x clever points for that bust a nut thing I said.
Handwrench [notcot]
Thanks Shawn, you wanna come over and help me build a deck?
Jun 2 2008 Geek Side Is The Best Side: Geek Gang Signs
Here are some geek gang signs that some nerds came up with when they were working on a secret handshake. As you can see, they're pretty questionable. But not nearly as questionable as the leftover red beans and rice I just had for lunch. Half the beans jumped out of the bowl and tried to stab me with my own fork while the rice just sat there and watched. Long story short: I had to go hungry, which sucks because all I had for breakfast were two hits of paper and four bonghits.
Geek Gang Signs [accordianguy]
Thanks Shawn, now lets come up with a super-sweet Geekologie handshake. Got any ideas?
May 27 2008 Finger-Regrowing 'Pixie Dust' Is At It Again
Remember the story we posted about the man who regrew the tip of his finger after having it cut off in a model airplane propeller? Yeah, that guy totally shouldn't have been allowed to work in a hobby store. Well now the infamous "pixie dust" is being used again -- this time in an attempt to regrow a soldier's finger that was lost in a bomb attack.
A key to the research dedicated to regrowing fingers and other body parts is a powder, nicknamed "pixie dust" by some of the people at Brooke Army Medical Center. It's made from tissue extracted from pigs.The surgery is part of a major new medical study of "regenerative medicine" being pursued by the Pentagon and several of the nation's top medical facilities, including the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center and the Cleveland Clinic. So far nearly $250 million has been dedicated to the research.
Awesome. I guess the only remaining question I have about this treatment is this: How ethical is it to cut off you junx and hope to regrow a bigger one?
Salamander-inspired therapy may aid injured vets [cnn]
Go here if you want to watch a graphic video about the procedure.
Thanks Patrick, lets steal Tinkerbell's fairy dust so we can fly
Apr 30 2008 For Real: Man Regrows Finger With Pixie Dust
Lee Spievak cut his finger off and then regrew it using pixie dust.
"I put my finger in," Mr. Spievak says, pointing towards the propeller of a model airplane, "and that's when I sliced my finger off."
Wow, Lee, wow. Reminds me of the time I stuck my tongue in an oscillating fan.
Today though, you wouldn't know it. Mr Spievak, who is 69 years old, shows off his finger, and it's all there, tissue, nerves, nail, skin, even his finger print. How? Well that's the truly remarkable part. It wasn't a transplant. Mr Spievak re-grew his finger tip. He used a powder - or pixie dust as he sometimes refers to it while telling his story. Mr Speivak's brother Alan - who was working in the field of regenerative medicine - sent him the powder.
The pixie dust, or more appropriately "pigsy dust", is actually made by scraping the cells from the inside of a pig's bladder, treating them with acid, and turning them into a powder. In addition to smelling like urine, the magical substance can regrow fingers lost in the propellers of model airplanes. Scientists hope that within 10 years we will be able to regrow arms and legs. Cool, scientists, but let's think outside the box for a second. How about you grow me a sweet pair of wings or a tail? That's what I want. Seriously though, I'm a little skeptical about this whole thing. I smoked a little angel dust once and I didn't grow a penis out of my forehead. I just felt like there were worms burrowing under my skin.
An uncensored picture of dude's severed finger (GRAPHIC), along with a link to the BBC article (which includes videos), after the jump.
Continue Reading " For Real: Man Regrows Finger With Pixie Dust "
