In news that would make anybody's blood boil who's spent two hours waiting to ride Pirates of the Caribbean with a bladder full of juice boxes, apparently rich Manhattan moms have gotten into the habit of hiring disabled tour guides to accompany their kids to Disney so they can... / Continue →

A 16-year old girl and her 15-year old BFF (and future cellmate) used prescription sleeping pills to lace the milkshakes of the 16-year old's parents so they would fall asleep and the girls could use the internet after their 10PM 'no internet use' curfew. Presumably to webcam ... / Continue →

These are the top 10 "trending" (search queries with the highest amount of traffic over a sustained period in 2012 as compared to 2011) global Google search and Google image searches for 2012. All in all, a pretty depressing collection. Surprisingly absent from the list were ... / Continue →

'Watching Cute Girl' is a depressing Japanese iPhone app that features a girl in over 180 pre-recorded videos where she just stares at you and says sweet things that nobody else ever will. It really makes me sad people use things like this instead of signing up for one of thos... / Continue →

First of all, the fact that sex tourism even exists depresses the hell out of me. I'll take a beach and a tropical drink over a prostitute aaaaaaany day. But that's just me, and I'm not a big ball of sadness, desperate to get his dangle-down played with. Enter robotic prosti... / Continue →

Seen here trying to look at both of us at the same time, this is a video containing "pretty much every denial" of Lieutenant Worf throughout Star Trek: The Next Generation. How he never goes Planet Express on everyone (get it? like going postal but in the future!) and kills th... / Continue →

OMG we're so embarrassed -- let's eat our hands! This is a video of some guy (he says he's a student but I suspect he's a prowler) traveling around a highschool asking some reaaaaaaaally basic trivia questions and all the kids getting them wrong. It's depressing. The though... / Continue →

Because men are constantly on the lookout for something that, if found by another human being, will forever brand them the saddest kind of pervert, somebody designed an iPad case with an integrated Fleshlight holder. For you innocent readers out there, a Fleshlight is a fake v... / Continue →

Dum dum dum! Bright Blinds (concept posted back in '07, now a real product) are blinds with a light behind them designed to look like a window. But when you yank the cord to actually see out the window, PRESTO! there isn't one. Nope, you're just staring at the hole you punc... / Continue →

"...he was here a minute ago." When you go how do you want your body finished off? I used to want to be shot out of a cannon but now I'm thinking I wanna be fed to sharks to kick off Shark Week one year. Pretty cool, right? "Whatever, just as long as you're dead." Damn y... / Continue →