Oct 14 2009 Live Action Mario, Lou Albano, Dies At 76

Some of you whippersnappers may be too young to remember the awesomeness that was the Super Mario Bros. Super Show, a 52-episode series that come out in '89. But I do, because it was on tv, and tv was my only friend (plus on Fridays there were Zelda cartoons!).

Wrestling fans know him as the WWE Hall of Famer who managed more than 50 wrestlers in his day, with more than two dozen championships won by athletes taken under his wing. 80's music fans might remember him from his appearances in many Cyndi Lauper music videos, including "Girls Just Want To Have Fun", "She Bop", "Time After Time" and "The Goonies 'R' Good Enough." As gamers, we of course remember him as the best live-action Mario of all time.

Sadly, Lou Albano passed away today at 76. He will be missed.

Opening credits to the show on Youtube HERE.
Entire show HERE.

Live-Action Mario Dead At 76 [kotaku]

Thanks to Doctor Steel, Aisha and Gabriel, who promise to send flowers to the funeral. Good looking, guys -- but they better be fireball flowers and not Piranha plants.

Oct 1 2009 Looks Safe To Me: A Power Line Bridge

This is a picture of Philippine residents using power lines as a bridge in wake of the recent Typhoon Ketsana (bitch). EDIT: It is sad and Geekologie wishes everyone affected the best. Plus jetpacks.

Using Power Lines as a Bridge Seems Incredibly Dangerous [gizmodo]

Sep 28 2009 Sadness: LEGO House Gets Demolished

The LEGO house built by James May for his BBC program Toy Stories was recently demolished after nobody stepped forward to buy and preserve the plastic abode. I would have, but I don't have the money. Or pants (pants? where I'm going I don't need pants). I'm going back to the past! Anyway, this is a little gallery of the demolition. Allegedly the blocks (which were actually donated by LEGO) are going to be used for charity builds in the future. So yeah, that's a silver lining. But not a silver panty liner! Which, haha, HORF HORF HORF HORF HORF.

Hit the jump for several more shots of the sadness.

Continue Reading " Sadness: LEGO House Gets Demolished "

Sep 22 2009 WoW Freakout Kid Versus Grandmother

This is a video of the infamous WoW freakout kid arguing with his grandmother, who's been sent over to watch him and his brother for the weekend. Now I really wanted to believe that these videos are real, but this one's the nail in the coffin for being fake. And not just because octogenarians are notoriously bad actresses (and will shit themselves on set), but she actually references him trying to jam the tv remote up his ass. Now I know how you're feeling, and yes, it's like Santa isn't real all over again.

Tough Granny Teaches Grandson a Lesson [break]

Thanks to Adam, who plays BINGO with his grandma on Tuesday nights and she always has him sneak a bottle of booze in. Fun lady!

Aug 24 2009 Sadness: Father Leaves Copy Of Call Of Duty: World At War For Fallen Soldier Son

So yeah, this is sad. Private Richard Hunt, the 200th U.K. soldier to die in Afghanistan, was buried over the weekend. He would have been 22 yesterday.

His father Phillip, enjoyed playing Call of Duty: World at War with his son. He left a copy of the game at his grave.

"Happy Birthday 'Hunty'. Play you again one day. Dad."

Wow, that tore me up.

Dad's Tribute: Call of Duty on Soldier Son's Grave [kotaku]

Thanks to Solozaur, whose single tear splattered F10.

Jul 22 2009 Sadness: Lost iPhone Prototype Drives Chinese Factory Worker To Suicide

And in a bit of sad news, a Chinese factory worker jumped to his death after losing track of an iPhone prototype he was responsible for shipping to Apple.

The dead worker, Sun Danyong, 25, worked in product communications at Foxconn Technology Group, a Taiwanese firm that makes many Apple products at a massive factory in the southern city of Shenzhen, near Hong Kong.

Sun was responsible for sending iPhone prototypes to Apple, and on July 13 he reported that he was missing one of the 16 fourth-generation units in his possession, the newspaper reported. His friends said company security guards searched his apartment, detained him and beat him, the paper reported.

Apple Inc. responded Wednesday by saying its suppliers are required to treat workers with dignity and respect.

Blood phones, just sayin'.

Chinese Worker Kills Self Over Missing iPhone [foxnews]

Thanks to Gino, who would have just burned the factory to the ground to cover up the loss. Smart thinking.

Jun 30 2009 Blocky Moonwalky: Michael Jackson As LEGO

This is Michael Jackson in LEGO form. And, because I'm actually made of solid gold classiness, I'm not going there. And by there I mean Michael Jackson jokes. And by not going I mean I heard they're going to burn the body so he can be the king of snap and crackle now too. *moonwalks self in crotch*

Michael Jackson - Moonwalk [mocpages]

Thanks to naas, who danced his ass off one time. Literally, both cheeks, gone.

Jun 30 2009 Miss You: The Pirate Bay Has Been Sold

The Pirate Bay, one of the world's best known torrent search portals, is being sold to some Swedish firm. It will no longer be so piratey.

Global Gaming Factory X AB, a Swedish firm that runs Internet cafes and game centers, plans to buy The Pirate Bay for 60 million kronor (~$8 million), twice the fine that was slapped on The Pirate Bay defendants by a Stockholm court earlier this year.

...the new owners plan to make it a legal service that allows "content providers and copyright owners [to] get paid for content that is downloaded via the site."

"Legal service"...."paid for content"....they better change the name.

Pirate Bay sold, to become more like Carnival Cruise Lines [arstechnica]

Thanks to Thumperchica and Zombie Pirate LeChuck, who agrees this isn't even Disney Pirate's Bay any more.

Jun 29 2009 Billy Mays Has Left The Infomercial Set

Billy Mays, a man best known for kicking Vince "Shamwow" Shlomi's ass in a no-holds-barred cagefighting match, died over the weekend following a freak head injury heart blockage. He was 50.

Police said Mays told his wife he didn't feel well when he went to bed Saturday night. Earlier in the day, he said he was hit on the head when his airliner had a rough landing at Tampa Bay's airport.

But the airline said no passengers reported any serious injuries, and Mays himself cheerfully recounted the landing for a local TV station.

Wow, that's pretty scary. Life is short folks, fight stains while you still can.

R.I.P. Billy.

Autopsy planned for TV pitchman Billy Mays [yahoo]

Thanks to everyone who sent this in. Stay clean guys, stay OxiClean.

Jun 26 2009 R.I.P.: Michael Jackson Has Left The Building

Michael Jackson died of cardiac arrest yesterday. He was 50. *performs crotch grab in remembrance* Rest in peace, Michael.

Hit the jump for some video tributes.

Continue Reading " R.I.P.: Michael Jackson Has Left The Building "

Jun 4 2009 UPDATE: David Carradine Found Dead

In case Geekologie is the only site on the interweb you visit (good for you), David Carradine, best known for his role as Shaolin priest Kwai Chang Caine in Kung Fu and Bill in the Kill Bill series, was found dead by alleged hanging in his hotel room in Bangkok. He was 72.

Carradine was in Bangkok to shoot a movie and had been staying at the hotel since Tuesday.

In all, he appeared in more than 100 feature films with such directors as Martin Scorsese, Ingmar Bergman and Hal Ashby. One of his prominent early film roles was as singer Woody Guthrie in Ashby's 1976 biopic "Bound for Glory."

Hi-ya, David, hi-ya. R.I.P.

UPDATE: Hanging was allegedly accidentally and the result of some eroticness gone wrong. Hey, it's how I want to go.

Actor David Carradine found dead in Bangkok [yahoonews]

Thanks to Gem, Rosswell, Steven, Freddy and Matthew, who have all taken the day off to partake in a Kung Fu marathon.

May 29 2009 No, No, No: Japanese Killer Construction Bot

Wow, they're not even trying to make them look cute anymore. The Japanese born ROBOTOPS is a construction robot whose name is spelled in all caps because IT MEANS BUSINESS. The killing business.

The four-legged, two-armed robot is actually a kind of automated mobile crane with 29 functioning joints for picking off humans, and of course the occasional piece of construction material.

Using a high quality three-chip CCD camera, the robot can be operated remotely for particularly dangerous jobs.

And no, I didn't alter that quote at all. Finally, people are starting to get the picture. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one that sees a problem here. Seriously, Japan -- you know I love you (manga, sushi, worn panty vending machines), but this shit has got to stop. Because if not, well, Godzilla. Just sayin', we share a special bond (read: intercourse).

Japanese construction firm unleashes insectoid robot crane on humanity [dvice]

Thanks to cougar78, Aaron and John, who know the only good robots are the little guys from Batteries Not Included. Am I right? No, that was a test and you all failed.

May 14 2009 We're As Good As Dead!: Boston Dynamics' Latest Robastard Is An Accomplished Climber

In Boston Dynamics' unending quest to cut humanity's reign on earth short, the company continues to develop new robotic death machines. In this case, a climber named RiSE (who I have briefly touched on before). As is evident from the video, the apocalyptic bastard makes pretty short work of climbing a telephone pole. So I'm pretty confident it could scurry across the floor, shimmy up my leg, and have my change purse in its razor sharp mandibles before I could utter, "but they just dropped".

RiSE Version 3 Prototype [kodlab]

Thanks to beefytee, Art and biggity2bit, who just informed me we're no longer safe in the tree fort. Quick -- to the zip line!

May 7 2009 Duke Nukem Forever Is Not Happening :(

In news that should surprise no one, apparently Duke Nukem Forever, the much anticipated follow up title in development since 1997(!!!), is being scrapped. I guess that's what happens when you take 12 years to develop a game.

Game On just received a somewhat cryptic form-email from development studios Deep Silver and Apogee Entertainment (a legal alias for 3D Realms) stating, simply, that "Deep Silver and Apogee Software are not affected by the situation at 3D Realms" and that "Development on the Duke Nukem Trilogy is continuing as planned." No further details were offered, or reference made to what the "situation at 3D Realms" actually is.

The situation, I suspect, is pissing money into a game for 12 years and seeing no return. I mean, I'm not financial analyst or anything, but I do know I want to ring the bell at the NYSE someday.

Duke Nukem For-Never? 3D Realms Shutting Down [pcworld]

Thanks to JMR and Nathan, who remember Duke when he was just Duke Napalmem.

Apr 1 2009 Awesome New Products From ThinkGeek

Squeeze Bacon and a Tauntaun sleeping bag, it's about freaking time!

This high-quality sleeping bag looks just like a Tauntaun, complete with saddle, internal intestines and glowing lightsaber zipper pull. Use the lightsaber zipper pull to illustrate how Han Solo saved Luke Skywalker from certain death in the freezing climate of Hoth by slitting open the belly of a dead Tauntaun and placing Luke inside the stinking (but warm) carcass.

Awesome!

Squeez Bacon® is fully cooked 100% bacon, it requires no preservatives or other additives. Each serving is as healthy as real bacon, and equivalent to 4 premium slices of bacon! You can put it on sandwiches, pizza, pastas, bacon, soups, pies, eat it hot or cold (warm Squeez Bacon® on toasted rye is to die for), substitute it for bacon in your recipes, or even eat it right out of the tube like we do!

The Tauntaun bag will set you back $40, and a tube of Squeez Bacon® will cost you $8. Unfortunately, they're both fake and you can't buy either one (April Fools!). Still, ThinkGeek is pretty foolish for not actually making these. So who knows, maybe they will (at least the sleeping bag). Because if they don't, I'm going to. I'd just prefer they do it because I'm lazy. I haven't even left the bed today! Seriously, I'm running out of dry spots.

Squeeze Bacon
and
Tauntaun Sleeping Bag
via
ThinkGeek (with several other April Fools products)

Thanks to Chrissy Poopy Pants McBacon Lover, brittany and xring, who would totally scarf some Squeez Bacon® while nestled at the bottom of their Tauntaun sleeping bags while reading comics by flashlight.

Mar 1 2009 What An R2-D2 Boombox Might Look Like

This is artist Bill McMullen's concept of what an R2-D2 boombox might look like if George Lucas had actually marketed some cool Star Wars merchandise instead of all the crap I still bought anyways. Unfortunately, this R2-Boom2 doesn't actually work, making it infinitely less useful for breakdancing. That sucker needs to pump some fresh beats! And also, project a holographic Leia that strips to the music. Best idea ever, or best idea ever -- you be the judge.

R2D2 Boombox, Now That's Art [uberreview]

Feb 23 2009 Yes!: Google Maps Spots Lost City Of Atlantis

That's right folks, you're looking at the lost city of Atlantis, buried under the ocean off the north-western coast of Africa (the country*).

This location is awfully close to one of the spots Plato, Legendary Smart Dude, had pinpointed as a possible resting place of Atlantis. In addition, the site is about the same size as Plato described.

Google claims that the lines are remnants of the sonar traces left by boats as they surveyed the area. Plus, Plato described Atlantis as being designed as a series of concentric circles, not a grid.

Now I hate to call Google a bunch of dirty liars, but that is clearly Atlantis. Haven't you ever heard that circles look square when viewed underwater? Yeah, it's called refraction. It's the same principal that makes a toot smell worse if you do it in the bathtub. Science, folks, you can't argue with that.

Atlantis Found on Google Earth, Official Explanation Is Dubious [gizmodo]

*Stop emailing me, I'm fully aware Africa is a continent.

Jan 26 2009 FunSlides: Damn You And Your Spaceage Plastic, Where Were You When I Was A Kid?

When I was a kid there were no FunSlides, we rode down the basement stairs on a baking sheet. And, goddammit, we hit the wall at the bottom and loved it.

Product Site

Thanks to Patrick, who glides across berber and shag with equal dexterity. Ladies?

Jan 22 2009 Wear Your Effing Wriststrap!: Woman Hits Dog With Wiimote, Killing It, Neighbor Revives

Kathy White hit her five-month old miniature Sheltie, Ozzy, in the head with a Wiimote when she was bowling with her daughter. Note: she didn't actually throw the remote, she was still holding it.

"We had just got the Wii for Christmas," explained owner Kathy White, "so we were trying it out, and that's when Alexis and I were bowling and Ozzy was standing by me and he jumped up and I hit him in the temple and killed him instantly."

Her first instinct was to call her neighbor Pene Honey for help.

Thankfully, Pene managed to come over and revive the dog with a little mouth to nose action.

Now she knows you have to be careful when playing a Wii.

"I just want people to be aware of their environment," White said, "especially small dogs and children so this doesn't happen to them. Because it was a horrifying experience and I don't want anyone to go through this."

I take it you didn't read the instructions before playing, did you, Kathy? No? Didn't notice the warning screen either? Jesus, how have you not died in a kitchen fire? Kathy White: astonishingly still alive after 40 years of not following instructions.

Hit the jump for a video report that will make you want to call animal services.

Continue Reading " Wear Your Effing Wriststrap!: Woman Hits Dog With Wiimote, Killing It, Neighbor Revives "

Jan 21 2009 Guy Makes Portal Gun, I Plan To Steal It

Holy crap somebody went and made the gun from Portal. I have absolutely no shame in telling you all I am going to steal the device, and then use it to rob a bank and escape the po-po.

Developed by Aperture Science, this Handheld Portal Device is an extremely limited edition (dare I say, one of a kind?) portal generator. Illuminated with blue ad orange LEDs, the entire gun runs off of only one 9V battery and needs no ammunition.

*donning pantyhose mask* See you in a bit!

UPDATE: HOLY SHIT I'VE GOT IT! I even managed to escape without detection, so I don't even know if the thing works yet. *pointing at bedroom wall* Well, here goes nothing! *PEW* OH MY GOD IT WORKS! Aaaaand there's my sister. Aaaaand she's naked. Quick, portal me in the eyes!

Hit the jump for a couple more views.

Continue Reading " Guy Makes Portal Gun, I Plan To Steal It "