Oct 27 2008 Oh God, No. No, No, No: Robot Determines Humans Taste Like Bacon, Are Delicious

MORE: apeshit , apocalypse , bacon , bad , can i at least have one dinosaur before i go? , cannibals , damnit , damnit when will people stop programming robots to kill us , eating , eating your brain , food , great , ham , happy , human body , humans , meat , robots , run for your life! , sausage , shitsteak , the opposite of good , uh-oh , wonderful , wrong , zombies

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Great. NEC's Tasting Robot, the diminutive bastard originally designed to assess wines, has now assessed humans -- and determined they'd taste delicious.

It's all pretty straightforward tech: stick a bit of nosh in front of the robogourmet's infrared spectrometer and it analyzes the reflected light to determine the chemical composition of the sample. A nice trick, although it can only be programmed to accurately identify a few dozen wines.


Innocent enough, you may think. However, when NEC demonstrated the cybersommelier to a reporter and snapper from Associated Press, the robot claimed the former's hand tasted of prosciutto ham, while the latter apparently had the unmistakable whiff of bacon about him.

Great, so it looks like we might end up fighting the robot and zombie apocalypses simultaneously. Wow, could today get any better? Not unless I get hit by a delivery truck. Oh shit -- or see a boob.

Humans taste of bacon, says gourmet robot [theregister]

Thanks to Birchie, king of ruining my day.

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Aug 11 2008 Weapon Wielding Wobots Worry World

MORE: apocalypse , bad decisions , bad ideas , break it's arm off! , damnit when will people stop programming robots to kill us? , destruction , doomsday , great , jerks , knight in robotic armor , mace , oh great we're all gonna die , oh shit , robot , robots , run for your life! , stupid , sword , we're all gonna die! , weapons , wtf were you thinking?


This is one of the most disturbing videos I've seen in a long time. It's two robots going at it with medieval weaponry. I have no idea why they exist, or what they're demonstrating, but I can't believe some shmuck programmed robots to swing weapons. WTF were you thinking? Like I don't already have enough to worry about. This is definitely gonna give me nightmares and daymares. But hopefully not a rash. I just got over the last one and can finally sit down on the toilet again. I freaking hate hovering.

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Thanks Brian, I love fearing for my life.

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