Nov 20 2009 Holy Grail? You Decide: A Bacon Chalice
I can't even imagine weaving bacon so tight as to not let liquid (well, molten cheese) through, but apparently somebody did. My hat oven mitts are off to you, bacon mug maker. Cause one time I tried weaving bacon and it didn't even make a solid placemat. It did, however, make a solid after-school snack. Kidding, I'm vegetarian. Did you feel that? That was your head imploding.
Bacon Beer Mug [thisisfreakingridiculous]
Thanks to Profound, mike469x, Dominican Joe, Freedom and KilgoreTrout XL, one of which is Kurt Vonnegut's plus-size alter-ego, the other three of which are fighting over who gets to eat the cup.
Nov 19 2009 I Smell Beer Pong!: Pick Your Nose Cups Prevent Spread Of Drinkborne Illnesses
These Pick Your Nose party cups from Fred are a set of 24 cups (2 each of 12 designs) with different noses printed on them. That way you can easily identify your beverage and not end up drinking from somebody's dipping spit-cup. WHICH HAPPENS. Plus, you you get to spice up your look a bit. Although I'm a little disappointed they didn't get a little more creative with the designs. What about a witch doctor's nose with a bone through it? Don't even tell me that's not a brilliant idea. Because I will shrink your head faster than you can say, "OOO EEE, OOO AH AH TING TANG WALLA WALLA BING BANG!" Now, go look in the mirror. Haha, of course I didn't actually do it -- I DON'T EFF WITH BLACK MAGIC. Now The Gathering, that's a whole different story none of your business.
Hit the jump for a woman drinking out of a man's nose model. A woman with a man's nose -- ha!
Continue Reading " I Smell Beer Pong!: Pick Your Nose Cups Prevent Spread Of Drinkborne Illnesses "
Oct 23 2009 CHOO CHOO!: A Little Superconductor Train
This is some French guy making a little superconductor train out of a bunch of magnets and a cup of magic potion. I have no idea what's in the magic potion but that won't stop me from chugging a whole chalice in the hopes of floating. Plus, it even works upside down which is super cool because I've always wanted to take a nap on the ceiling. I will drool on you!
Thanks to Rich the destroyer, who destroys because he's Rich the destroyer damnit, you know who he is!
Jun 22 2009 Go Plates: Stacking Food On Your Beer
Go Plates are reusable party plates (not to be confused with party hats) that sit on top of your beer can, bottle or plastic cup, allowing you a free hand for playing grab-ass with all your friends or whatever it is people do at parties (I've never been to one). A pack of 42 will set you back $48.50, which isn't too bad considering their reusable (read: I'll lay them all out on the floor and let the dog lick them before putting them back in the cabinet). Party at my house!
Thanks to Gino, who once choked on a hors d'œuvre and had to be given mouth to mouth by a very sexy lady.
May 27 2009 Runpee: It Is Now Safe To Leave The Theater
Runpee.com is a website database of movies currently in the theater with notations that let you know when it's a good time to run to the bathroom. As you can see, this is the runpee chart for Terminator Salvation, which features several opportunities to drain your dragon. Of course, some would argue any time is good because the movie sucked. I wouldn't know, I haven't seen it BECAUSE I HAVE ENOUGH TROUBLE SLEEPING ALREADY. Also, I don't like leaving my seat during a movie, so you know what I do? I use a catheter. Except I definitely don't because I would pass out from the thought before I even had my pants down. Which is why the last movie I saw in the theater was Cars. Not even kidding.
Thanks to Randi, who just asks for an empty cup from the concession stand.
Apr 10 2009 Mmmm, Brain-y: A Darth Vader Coffee Mug
I'm sure this isn't the first Darth Vader coffee mug, but it is the first I've seen with a removable cap that keeps your morning cocktail hidden from the prying eyes and noses of non-alcoholic coworkers.
Let Darth Vader watch over your coffee as you drink deeply from the dark side with the Dark Lord of the Sith! This attractive (and oh-so-shiny) black ceramic mug holds 24-ounces of your favorite beverage, but what's really special is that it features a removable helmet that keeps your drink from getting cold too quickly. Vader will use the Force to guard and keep it at the proper temperature.
The mug costs $17 and could only be cooler if it had a misshapen ceramic head inside that was slowly revealed as you drink your morning apéritif. And speaking of which -- I think the secretary is on to me. God, mind your own business, sugartits!
Thanks to Don Chi Chi's, who once drank jungle juice out of Vader's real helmet at a party and then threw up.
Apr 1 2009 Own A Plastic Box Of NYC Trash For $50
Nope, not April Fools either. Real boxes of "hand-picked" trash from the streets of New York City are available for $50 from greedy garbage tycoon Justin Gignac. You can also get limited edition boxes from Yankee Stadium or New Year's Eve for $100.
I sell garbage. I scour New York City streets picking up trash. After filling bags with subway passes, Broadway tickets, and other NYC junk, I carefully arrange plastic cubes full of the stuff. Each box is unique and won't leak or smell. The cubes are then signed, numbered, and dated, making them perfect for anyone wo wants their own piece of the NYC landscape.
Apparently Justin has already sold over 700 cubes in over 41 states and 19 countries. So, somebody start selling them for $10, and maybe I'll buy one. People buying trash off the streets of New York City, that is just amazing. Well, like the saying goes, "one man's trash is another man's free needle". I'm gonna try shooting glue!
Hit the jump for a close-up of a cube.
Feb 28 2009 Yes Please!: World Of Warcraft Beer Steins
Oh hell yes. Now that's what I call drinking like a king! A Lich King. ZA-ZA-ZA-ZING! These World of Warcraft beer steins come in three models: the Lich King (pictured here), the Blood of the Horde, and the Alliance United (go HERE to check those out). Each costs $90 and is far superior to a Solo cup, both in volume AND ability to be used as a weapon. KA-CRACK! -15 your skull.
Order Page
via
World of Warcraft: Wrath of The Lich King Beer Stein [uberreview]
Jan 20 2009 Admit It, You're Lazy: A Cup Noodle Machine
Why you'd need a vending machine for a product that only requires hot water and three minutes to be ready for consumption is beyond me. Yet, here it is, a Cup Noodle (I always thought it was Cup-O-Noodles) vending machine.
It's small enough to fit on a counter top, and includes a hot water thermos and storage for up to four Cup Noodle bowls with a dispenser. It even has an automatic timer that'll beep when three minutes is up and your food is ready to eat.
Jesus, it's called a microwave, folks. And who else has accidentally eaten part of the styrofoam cup while downing a Cup Noodle all drunk? Go ahead, admit it -- nothing to be ashamed of. HAHA, you freaking ate the cup! To your credit though, I wouldn't trust you with a fork either.
Nissin offers introverts compact cup noodle vending machines [tokyomango]
Thanks to Niki, who stopped eating Ramen in college because she got to look at some under a microscope and it looked too noodley.
Jun 5 2008 Self-Stirring Coffee Mug For The Fingerless
Are you a lazy bastard or a shop teacher that's had ten accidents? If so, this self stirring mug may be for you. The mugs are made by Gevalia, a company best known for convincing me to sign up for their coffee of the month club through the use of a well placed late-night infomercial featuring a sexy saleswoman with a sultry voice. Anyway, the $19 mug features a special base that runs on two AAA batteries and promises "to gently stir your beverage at the push of a button". Now call me crazy, but what kind of gentle stir creates a freaking whirlpool in your beverage? That picture looks like a blender set on the highest setting. You'd have hot beverage in your lap quicker than you could say "I'm suing you McDonalds because I'm a stupid asshole and the coffee you served me was hot." Still, I'm buying one. Mostly because, unlike that pussy James Bond, I like my martinis stirred -- and served in 12-ounce mugs. Suck it Bond, you couldn't even spy on your own girlfriend in the shower.
Stir Mug Does All Of The Work For You [ohgizmo]
Apr 4 2008 Ergonomic Coffee Mug Fits Your Lips
This is a coffee mug designed with a thin wall at the top that's slightly curved to conform to your lips. Now, you know how much I hate to brag, but I can drink like a grown up and don't have any problems with a regular mug. But if you're one of the people out there that can't manage to drink your morning coffee without spilling all over yourself, I have an alternative solution: Ask your mommy to get you a sippy cup the next time she's at the store picking up your diapers. Oooh, burn!
Dec 26 2007 Man Buys Most Expensive Starbucks Drink
Recently a man, who will now be known as Shaky Hands Joe, went to Starbucks in an attempt to buy the most expensive drink he could imagine. It turned out to be a 13 shot venti soy hazelnut vanilla cinnamon white mocha with extra white mocha and caramel, which will now be known as the drink that tastes like ass. It would have cost $13.76 with tax (ignore receipt), but the bastard had a coupon and got it for free. This story reminds me of the time I went on a date and ordered the most expensive bottle of wine the restaurant had. Not only did it not come in a box, it cost $600! After we had finished our meal I excused myself to the restroom and tried to escape out the window. Unfortunately I was too drunk and ended up passing out in a stall and puking on myself. See, very similar story.
Most expensive Starbucks beverage [core77]
Sep 21 2007 Beer Pong Device Ensures A Sweet Rack
Two college kids, who I imagine are sixth year juniors, started their own company (The Founding Collegians) and created The Rack, which is a device you put the cups in when playing beer pong. It's designed to keep a perfect rack, allow re-racks, and prevent spills. I've actually played with these things before and they work (the ball holders are a nice touch). It stops those jerks who think the object of the game is to just knock cups over. They cost $15 for two. Oh, and speaking of perfect racks, the Geekologie Perfect Rack Competition is now in full swing ladies, so keep those pictures coming via the tip line. The winner gets a free me staring at their hooters.
A video of trick beer pong shots for your mindless enjoyment after the jump.
Aug 16 2007 Connectable Coffee Mugs
Designer Jonathan Aspinall has developed coffee mugs that can be linked together to form a six mug chain that can (allegedly) be easily carried. Each mug has a plus shaped male connection on one side, and matching female on the other. Now I don't know about you, but if I was sporting these around the office one morning, I imagine they would be in a coworker's trunk by mid-afternoon. I'm sticking to my trusty urine sample cup. People don't even come into the cubicle, let alone think about stealing my mug.
Connectable Coffee Mugs [yankodesign]
Jul 2 2007 The Ultimate Coffee Cup
Designer David Pier believes he's put together the ultimate coffee cup, which he describes as:
The ultimate in ergonomic modern design. A unique and innovative cup that is as delightful to the hand as it is to the eye. Usually, original designs are different just to be different and therefore can be awkward to use, but this mug was designed to be superior in its function. Every convention was challenged during the design process; new techniques were even developed to accurately manufacture the unusual shape. Just as no time or effort was spared in the design, only the finest porcelain was used in the manufacture.
You can get them for $22 each here, though it's not nearly as ultimate as the designer would have you believe. I asked mine to pick up some groceries and all it did was crash my car into a tree. Ultimate my ass!
May 9 2007 Zippered Wine Glasses
For $99.99 you can get a set of four of these zippered wine glass which features a hand-painted zipper up the side and an actual zipper-pull attached midway. And if this isn't the coolest wine glass you've ever seen, you're a damn liar. Unless you're talking about that wine glass I made out of braided unicorn hair. Yeah, I guess that one was pretty spectacular.
May 2 2007 The Pessimist's Mug
Looks like somebody took this idea, and decided to translate it to English and turn it into a mug. The Pessimist's Mug is exactly what it looks like. Uh, unless you thought it was a beaker. Because that's what I thought it was. A really crappy one with only one measurement: half.
