Nov 19 2009 Modern Warfare 2 Crybaby's Music Video
NOTE: Video slightly NSFW due to adult language from a blimey 14-year old.
You ever wonder what else is going on in the world of a kid who will cry and punch the wall about a video game not living up to his expectations? Apparently a budding music career. And by budding I mean rotting. On the vine. You will never sell those tomatoes! Still, I did find myself kind of bobbing my head from 1:15 - 1:30 (the best part, plus I'm so high I feel like I'm typing with claws). But don't say his name -- he'll knock you out! Probably with rotten-tooth breath. BRING IT NANCY!
GuitarJono1170's Youtube Channel (with a ton of other crappy videos)
Thanks to Matt, who knifed this kid in Modern Warfare 2 and had him crying for days.
Nov 16 2009 WTF WAS THAT?: Boy Loses His Cool, Cries And Punches Wall Over Modern Warfare 2
NOTE: NSFW DUE TO LANGUAGE. WATCH IT WITH HEADPHONES ON OR THE VOLUME LOW.
There's rock bottom, and then they're webcam-ing yourself crying and punching the wall over your disappointment about Modern Warfare 2. Jesus, kid, fix yourself a spot of tea and calm the f*** down. Oh, and for the love of God: lose the milk mustache.
Thanks to kweks, who had a meltdown about the new Super Mario Bros. for Wii but was smart enough not to tape it.
Aug 27 2009 Cry Baby: Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat (R.I.P.)
NOTE: Video possibly NSFW due to cussing (GD) a couple times.
This post originally started as a tribute to Keyboard Cat, who I just found out passed away earlier this year (around May). But then I saw the play him off video featured above of a kid crying about a hockey game and filming it for his Youtube channel when his dad walks in and yells at him for being such an idiot moron. It is amazing. Not that I'd know anything about filming myself crying because sex tapes don't count, right? There was something in my eye!
Hit the jump for another classic play him off from Walker, Texas Ranger (it's even more f'ed up).
Continue Reading " Cry Baby: Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat (R.I.P.) "
Jun 22 2009 Fake?: Boy Freaks Out Over Cancelled WoW
This is a video of a boy losing his shit because his mom canceled his World of Warcraft subscription. I have my doubts about it's genuineness, but he does try to stuff a remote control up his ass at 1:10, so it could be real.
Thanks to Amanda, Ed, Miriam, Chase, Jon and MoD, who are cool as cucumbers in a bowl of hot sauce.
Jun 14 2009 Childhood Fears Recreated As Photographs
Joshua Hoffine is a photographer who recreates scenes of childhood fears. They are scary.
My images are not photoshop collages.I use photoshop to finesse details and to adjust color and contrast for printing.I use friends and family members as actors and crew.Everyone works for free. We do it for fun.
Wow -- I know one guy who's gonna be sleeping with his light on tonight. His fleshlight. God, I can't believe I even know what that is. No, no I'm not.
Hit the jump for several of my favorites, then hit the link for a bunch more.
Continue Reading " Childhood Fears Recreated As Photographs "
Apr 15 2009 6-Year Old Finds Pron On New PSP, Cries
A six-year old found a bunch of nudey pictures on the PSP his mother purchased for him from Walmart and got all upset about it and cried to his mommy.
Tamatha said she found a memory card inside the PSP containing hundreds of pornographic pictures. She claimed it's not hers and it was in the PSP before she opened the box.
She then called the store wanting to speak with a manager about the problem. "I explained the situation and his response was, 'well, bring the machine down and we'll let your son pick out a new game,'" she said. "And I was like, no I don't think you heard what I said."
Tamatha is demanding a new gaming system, apology, and written promise her son won't grow up to be gay. Good luck with that Tamatha, but I've got news for you: he's been that way since birth. I mean, he cried when he saw a naked woman. What? Well, yeah, but I only do it sometimes.
Mom Finds Porn on New PSP [myfoxboston]
Thanks to Chris and Asiantom, who would have felt like they just won the fapping lottery.
Apr 2 2009 Today's Awesome Failure Award Goes To....
Well, actually, it's a tie. First, a liquor store robber who probably had his mommy drive him there while he finished his juice box.
Police say a 19-year-old who tried to rob a liquor store sat down and cried after 76-year-old owner locked him in the store. The man was accused of trying to rob Sykes Liquor Store in Trenton Monday night. Police said the owner, who was behind the counter, triggered the lock after the man grabbed a bottle of Hennessy cognac and bolted for the door.
The man then allegedly pulled out a handgun and demanded to be released. But the owner said he saw that the gun was a fake, refused to unlock the door and called police.Police said the suspect threw away the gun, slumped to the floor and was crying when officers arrived to arrest him.
Wow, that is both sad and awesome at the same time. Kind of like the first time I had sex, but without the -- oh wait, he was crying. Yep, exactly like that then. Next, an idiotic failure at life who called 911 after "locking" herself in her car.
A woman called Kissimmee police to say she was locked inside her car at the Walgreen's on John Young Parkway near Poinciana.
"My car will not start. I'm locked inside my car," the unidentified woman said. "Nothing electrical works. And it's getting very hot in here, and I'm not feeling well."The dispatcher asked the woman if she was able to manually pull the lock up on the door. The woman said she would try, and then, she said, "Yes, I got the door open."
Can we please get that woman's license revoked? And also, oxygen supply. If only she hadn't gotten reception....damn you, Verizon network!
Man cries after attempt to rob liquor store fails [yahoonews]
and
Woman to 911: Help! I'm locked inside my car [orlandosentinel]
Thanks to Joemo and Jason, who have never cried because when they feel a tear coming they just punch themselves in the eye until it goes away.
Mar 12 2009 Superman: Perhaps A Little Too Strong
Been there. Was not super.
Action Comics Fail [failblog]
Sep 30 2008 Dorky Self Defense
This is an instructional video about how to defend yourself in the likely event that someone is attacking you because you looked at them funny. I tried a couple of the moves out on a coworker, and I must admit: there was some definite arousal.
Youtube
Thanks to P05TMAN, who'll get your shit delivered even after the Large Hadron Collider destroys the planet.
