Oct 9 2009 NASA's Moon Bombing High-Five Fail
This is a short video from the live-feed at NASA showing the group responsible for bombing the moon celebrating after a job well done. Just watch red shirt there get snubbed by black shirt after initiating a high-five sequence. THEY EVEN MAKE DIRECT EYE CONTACT. Geez, talk about awkward. I've only aborted a high-five once, and that was because I knew the guy didn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. Seriously bro, I'm not touching your junk.
Thanks to Martyn, who has never been denied a high-five BECAUSE HE WILL RIP YOUR ARM OFF AND DO IT HIMSELF IF YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
Apr 10 2009 Mmmm, Brain-y: A Darth Vader Coffee Mug
I'm sure this isn't the first Darth Vader coffee mug, but it is the first I've seen with a removable cap that keeps your morning cocktail hidden from the prying eyes and noses of non-alcoholic coworkers.
Let Darth Vader watch over your coffee as you drink deeply from the dark side with the Dark Lord of the Sith! This attractive (and oh-so-shiny) black ceramic mug holds 24-ounces of your favorite beverage, but what's really special is that it features a removable helmet that keeps your drink from getting cold too quickly. Vader will use the Force to guard and keep it at the proper temperature.
The mug costs $17 and could only be cooler if it had a misshapen ceramic head inside that was slowly revealed as you drink your morning apéritif. And speaking of which -- I think the secretary is on to me. God, mind your own business, sugartits!
Thanks to Don Chi Chi's, who once drank jungle juice out of Vader's real helmet at a party and then threw up.
Dec 4 2008 Annoy Coworkers With The Annoyatron 2.0
The Annoyatron 2.0 is a little gadget that makes annoying noises at random so you can drive a very special coworker to the point of stabbing you and/or stealing your lunch from the communal fridge. The sounds are as follows:
-15kHz (Mosquito tone) (full volume)
-Cricket chirping (medium/low volume)
-IM Doorbell (low volume)
-Grating Electronic noise (full volume)
-Typical Electronic Beep (medium volume)
Just hide the little board in somebody's office, don your stab-proof jacket, and wait for the insanity to set in! Don't have a stab-proof jacket? Well you're in luck -- I happen to be selling them! They may just look like garbage bags, but you have The Geekologie Writer's personal guarantee they are real garbage bags.
Annoy-a-tron 2.0 Lets You to Slowly Drive Your Co-Workers Insane Just for Fun [gizmodo]
Thanks to 42 y/o undead warlock, who doesn't need an Annoyatron, because he's got warlock powers and shit.
Sep 16 2008 It's About Time: Anti-Theft Lunch Bags
There's nothing worse than nagging your mommy to pack you a really good lunch only to have it stolen by some dick of a coworker. Enter the Anti-Theft Lunch bag, a Zip-Lock with moldy looking splotches printed on both sides. Created by designer Sherwood Forlee, you can email him to be notified when the bags become available for sale. Or, I dunno, make your own. Another option is to just bring two lunches so if somebody eats one you've still got a backup.
UPDATE: Who the hell steals two lunches?
Hit the jump to see what a sandwich looks like inside. Spoiler: Moldy.
Sep 3 2008 Say No To Carpal Tunnel: Bloody Stump Wrist Rests Perfect For Halloween, Zombie Decoys
Worried about developing carpal tunnel? Get a job where you don't have to type. But for the rest of us, there are wrist rests. This $15 set includes one hand and foot and is sure to get a rise out of undead coworkers. Of course, if you actually do work with zombies you should probably chop their heads off before they eat your brain. As a matter of fact, The Superficial Writer and I had to take a fire axe to the secretary just this afternoon when we caught her eating an arm.
UPDATE: Haha, it was a meatball sub. I swear, that marinara can be deceiving. Well, long story short, we called the coppers and blamed it on The Iwatchstuff Writer.
Hit the jump for a few more pictures of the gore.
Feb 22 2008 Sweet Cannon Will Look Great On My Desk
If there are two things I wish I could do at work they would definitely be 1. drink (well, openly), and 2. fire a cannon. And now thanks to the 25-Inch Field Cannon one of my wishes can become reality.
This cannon features an automatic charger mechanism for rapid, multiple firing plus an automatic flint igniter. Weighing 7 lbs, it operates on the same principle as a gas engine in an automobile--using gas, fresh air, and a spark. Powdered calcium carbide "ammo" is added to the water in the chamber of the cannon. The auto flint firing mechanism creates the spark to give perfect combustion.
It costs $150 and I just ordered one. I can hardly wait. I'm going to fire it off in celebration any time I complete a job well done. Like successfully logging onto the computer, making a phone call, finishing lunch, sending an email, etc. The other cubies will probably hate me but they're a bunch of dumb a-holes anyway. Say, that reminds me of a funny joke. I just flew back from a business meeting in Detroit and boy are my arms tired because I had to punch the shit out out of a coworker for taking the window seat.
25-Inch Cannon Goes Boom [ohgizmo]
