Jan 21 2009 Beer Hoodie: Look, Bartender -- No Hands!

MORE: alcohol , beer , booze , bottle , cold , cold ones , cool ones , fashion , hands-free , hoodie , it might just be the booze talking -- but i love booze , look bartender -- no hands -- or tip! later sucker! , sure why not , transportation , warm ones

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I've got the feeling this has existed forever, but just in case it hasn't, here it is -- the $36 Beer Pouch Sweatshirt with Hood.

Finally! You can carry around a beer while leaving your hands free to high five a complete stranger in the stands, carry more beer, or operate your hands-free cellphone. The Beer Pouch Sweatshirt is perfect for sporting events, picnics, and really boring offices.


Features a 30 square inch pouch with elastic band and an insulating liner to keep your beer ice cold. The pouch can stretch to accommodate soda cans, bottled water, and even cans of soup and bottles of whipped cream.

Wow, I think that effectively convinced me not to buy one after all. Not that I was going to anyways -- I've already got a beer carrier. Isn't that right, wench? Wench?

NOTICE: Now hiring new beer wench. Must be able to lift 20 lbs, support 190. Large breasts a plus, penis a minus.

Product Page

Thanks to pirhan, who hand-frees beer the old fashioned way, with one of those beer helmets.

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Dec 31 2008 I Like Cold Beverages: The Cooper Chiller

MORE: alcohol , aluminum , bad ideas , beer , beer -- it's what's for every meal , can , cold , cold ones , cool , cool ones , cooling , deliciousness , drink , drinking , drinks , drunk , dumb , garbage , hot , mouth , no thanks , piece of shit , pos , room temperature ones , stupid , warm ones , whee!

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The $60 Cooper Cooler Rapid Beverage Chiller chills a beer down to 43 °F in sixty seconds. So, at the moderate drinking rate of one beer per 45 seconds, you only have 15 seconds of down time until the next beer is ready. Not too shabby. You just fill the P.O.S. with ice and water, and presto: it rotates your can, all the while hosing the aluminum bastard down with cold water. Of course, if you're looking for something a little more powerful -- something that can cool a beer instantly -- I've got two words for you: witch titties.

One Minute Drink Chiller Works Better Than A Fire Extinguisher [ohgizmo]

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