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Results for "condition"

  • October 4, 2010
    Melissa Peacock is just like every other 17-year old except she has a tube (not to be confused with the series that makes up the internet) connecting her brain and stomach to siphon off excess brain fluid and prevent migraines. So yeah, just your average 17-year old cyborg zom... / Continue →
  • April 14, 2010
    Some 24-year old chick in Britain fell off her Wii Balance Board and has become a sex addict as a result of the tumble. Hello, city council? This is the president speaking. I want you to repave all the sidewalks with Wii Balance Boards, pronto. It seems that, courtesy of th... / Continue →
  • October 28, 2009
    The Happiness Hat is a little beanie that senses if you're smiling and stabs you in the back of the head with a spike if you're not. It was designed by Lauren McCarthy to train your brain to smile, but it would probably just train my brain to leak out the hole it's made. You ... / Continue →
  • September 29, 2009
    Let's be honest with ourselves: our children, when first born, are ugly and their heads are all smushed cause they just got squeezed through a vagina like the last of the toothpaste. And by "our" I mean "your" because I don't have any kids. But now there's hope for your littl... / Continue →