NOTE: I was summoned for jury selection today so I have to go in and do that. I'll write what I can, but I'm pretty sure my day is gonna consist of eight hours of sitting around with no phone or any other way to entertain myself besides practicing crying in different keys. Th... / Continue →

Because what good is the internet if we can't use it to waste government resources and increase taxes, a petition to start construction of a Death Star by 2016 was proposed on the White House's website. And, since the petition garnered nearly 35,000 signatures, the White House... / Continue →

This is a presumably fake-ass video of a Bigfoot sighting in Provo Canyon, Utah. I'm not positive what the hell I was looking at, but I'm pretty confident it was either a bear, a dog burying some turds in a hole, or a person in a gorilla costume. And is it just a coincidence ... / Continue →

Because the internet is running drier than a cat's tongue, here's a Chewbacca-centric post featuring a themed messenger bag (ThinkGeek product site HERE), armpit tattoo, and "sexy" Chewbacca cosplay. "Jesus, GW." Haha, I know man -- it's BAD. Unless something magical appears... / Continue →

Rich Dewberry, who, despite his name is allegedly straight, was recently falsely outed on Facebook by a Best Buy employee who was supposed to repair his phone but instead posted a message on Rich's already-signed-in Facebook account. The Geek Squad: maybe not as professional a... / Continue →

Thought KFC's Double Down sandwich was bad for you? Then think again. Because Friendly's just dropped the Grilled Cheese Burgermelt. What the hell's a Grilled Cheese Burgermelt? The sound of your heart trying to escape out your butthole. This is the BurgerMelt to end all ... / Continue →

Seen here demonstrating how to properly milk a bull, Dr. Mark Gasson implanted a computer chip in his hand to raise awareness about just how little it takes to call yourself a scientist these days. God, there used to be standards. Gimme that lab coat! It allows him to open s... / Continue →

Because Avatar has effectively rendered 2-D obsolete, this month's Playboy will feature a 3-D centerfold. Just don't forget to take the glasses off before leaving your bedroom or we'll all know what you were doing in there! "What would people most like to see in 3-D?" asked P... / Continue →

Still think it's cool being a fanboy? You're one of him. iDouche [cheezburger] Thanks to cookies 'n cream and Professor XXX, both of whom sound like porn stars. One possibly disabled.... / Continue →

I don't know if China has even seen a drawing of a Yeti before but they never look like this. And they're also never in pink cages popping an angry squat while their picture's being taken. Glaring inaccuracies aside, this is the "oriental yeti". The creature was snared in Si... / Continue →