Apr 23 2009 Uh-Oh: Doctor Claims He Can Clone Humans

Just look at all those cute little babies. Really makes you consider wearing a condom next time, doesn't it? Yeah it does. Anyway, Dr. Panayiotis Zavos, a controversial fertility doctor, claims he's gonna be cloning humans within two years.

[The] doctor has claimed he cloned 14 human embryos and transferred 11 of them into women's wombs. Dr Panayiotis Zavos carried out the work at a secret laboratory thought to be in the Middle East.

"Dr Zavos saw vigorous growth in 30 cell embryos before he transferred them into the womb and that is why he is optimistic that a human clone baby will be born within two years," he said.

"This has reached an advanced stage and is potentially a viable form of infertility treatment."

The article goes on to discuss the ethics of a woman who wants her 10-year old daughter, who died in a car crash, cloned. Which, wow, sounds like the worst idea I've heard all morning. Seriously -- and I had an offer to go play in traffic. No, when it comes to cloning, there's one very simple rule: dinosaurs only.

Could Cloning Bring Dead Girl Back To Life? [skynews]

Thanks to jigga, Thumperchica and Christina, who all want GW clones but I told them no. I've seen Multiplicity! Okay, I haven't -- but I did see the commercial where the dumb one tries to stick pizza in his wallet.

Feb 2 2009 Jurassic Park Here I Come!: Scientists Clone Extinct Species, Dinosaurs Hopefully Next

That happy little camper is a Pyrenean ibex. He's from Narnia. And sadly, he's dead. Along with all the other Pyrenean ibexes. But scientists just cloned one from frozen cells but then it died too. So there aren't any more. Which is a real shame, they look delicious.

Using DNA taken from these skin samples, the scientists were able to replace the genetic material in eggs from domestic goats, to clone a female Pyrenean ibex, or bucardo as they are known. It is the first time an extinct animal has been cloned.

Sadly, the newborn ibex kid died shortly after birth due to physical defects in its lungs. Other cloned animals, including sheep, have been born with similar lung defects.

t has also increased the possibility that it will one day be possible to reproduce long-dead species such as woolly mammoths and even dinosaurs.

Did you read that last bit? I didn't make that up, somebody actually wrote that. Dinosaurs, baby, get excited. Speaking of which, The Geekologie Writer's Heavy-Petting Zoo is currently seeking financial investors. Facebook message me if you're rich. Or want to exchange naked pictures.

Extinct ibex is resurrected by cloning [telegraph]

Thanks to Adam and Mark, who will each receive a free Woolly Mammoth ride.

Jan 29 2009 Yay?: First Commercially Cloned Dog In US

Ed and Nina Otto are two rich crybabies that just couldn't deal with the cancer death of their dog Sir Lancelot Encore in January, 2008. So what did the couple do? Be happy with their eight other dogs? Adopt another one from the pound? Hell no, that would be too logical. Instead, the Otto's paid $155,000 to have Sir Crapalot cloned by South Korean company BioArts International.

"He's back with me," said Nina, "in terms of the essence of him, as much as you could probably expect to ever get back someone who died."

This is Sir Lancelot, as he was, when he was nice and healthy," said Nina Otto, "probably around the time that we actually took his DNA and froze it."

"I know that to a lot of people spending that much money is ridiculous. I've heard some of my friends say 'On a dog?', but it wasn't just a dog. It was Lancelot."

No, he was just a dog. And, despite his name, he probably couldn't even wield a sword. And who's to say this one isn't going to get cancer too? Smart thinking. And on a side note, I have news for you folks: your dog isn't special to anyone but you -- everybody else thinks your dog is plain. Some of your friends probably even think it's sub-plain despite what they tell you to your face. No, the only truly special dog in this world is mine. Ooh, and that one that can walk on its back legs.

Pair Pay £100k To Clone Dead Pet [sky]

Thanks to Clint, whose efforts to clone his favorite turtle have failed.

Nov 6 2008 Scientists Still Hope To Clone Extinct Species

Scientists, spurred on by the passing of Michael Crichton, have kicked their efforts of cloning extinct species into high gear. And I think I speak for all of us here when I say, sex with dinosaurs: it's about freaking time.

Japanese scientists have produced clones of mice that have been dead and frozen for 16 years -- a feat that could lead researchers to one day resurrect long-extinct species, such as the mammoth.

Researchers had thought that frozen cells were unusable because ice crystals would have damaged the DNA. That belief would rule out the possibility of resurrecting extinct animals from their frozen remains. But the latest research -- published in the journal, Proceedings for the National Academy of Sciences -- shows that scientists may have overcome the obstacle.

Yes please! Now tell me somebody's got some frozen dinosaur remains around here somewhere. If not, we're going to need to go back in time and get some. Damn, sometimes my profound logic amazes even me.

Scientists hope to clone extinct species [cnn]

Thanks to Jonathan, who fears for a dinosaur apocalypse. Which, incidentally, is my dreamworld.

Jan 30 2008 PX-3600: Thanks, It's Just What I Wanted!

While many of you probably got Wii's, PS3's or 360's for Christmas, my loving parents got me a, um, PX-3600. I know, I know, you're jealous. And rightfully so, this is a next generation console, and I have it now. The wicked PX-3600 comes with two old-school 9-pin controllers (one of which vibrates), and, well, that's about it. Thanks mom and dad! It's just what I wanted. Hey, the disk tray on top doesn't open. How am I supposed to put games in? What's that? All the games are built-in? Wow! Talk about future technology. I'm gonna start playing right now! post this on eBay immediately.

A picture of the system out of the box after the jump.

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