Nov 17 2009 BURN IT DOWN!: The Bender Head House
The Bender House looks like Bender's dome from Futurama. If you've never seen Futurama I'm going to assume you don't have a television or internet so you probably aren't even reading this. Unless they print out copies of Geekologie and distribute them in Africa, which, I think we can all agree, is the best idea you've ever heard. Anyway, I'm gonna go ahead and start taking bets on how many beers it takes me to crash out of Bender's right eye and lay bleeding in the driveway -- oh -- oh -- *crash* Fourteen and a couple buttery nipples. Now somebody call 911 411, this guy needs a pizza.
I want this house [warmingglow]
Thanks to Marcie, who used to live in a house that looked like Robbie the Robot but it mysteriously burnt down. *whistling* Weird.
Nov 13 2009 Yeah, No: Video From Top of The Burj Dubai
This is a video taken from the top of the Burj Dubai, the tallest building in the world, at 2,684 ft. Jesus, that's half a mile. Can you believe humans are even capable of this? I can't -- I shit my swim trunks on the high dive once. But, to my credit, I did do one hell of a cannonball.
This Video From the Tip Top of the Burj Dubai Makes Me Sick to My Stomach [gizmodo]
Thanks to Rick, who has dived off higher platforms into a cup of water. I mean, he died, but he did do it.
Oct 21 2009 Holy Amazing: POP-UP Book LEGO Scene
This is a LEGO scene constructed in the form of a pop-up book. It's absolutely amazing and has a giant pagoda that folds together in the middle. I couldn't even imagine building something so impressive so I'm just going to hang my head in shame and cry into this pile of DUPLO blocks. Yes, DUPLO -- I'm not allowed to play with LEGO. IF YOU DON'T WANT ME TO CHOKE ON THEM THEN WHY DO YOU MAKE THEM LOOK LIKE CANDY?!
Thanks to david and Lee, who once popped out of a pop-up book at a birthday party and scared a bunch of children.
Sep 28 2009 Sadness: LEGO House Gets Demolished
The LEGO house built by James May for his BBC program Toy Stories was recently demolished after nobody stepped forward to buy and preserve the plastic abode. I would have, but I don't have the money. Or pants (pants? where I'm going I don't need pants). I'm going back to the past! Anyway, this is a little gallery of the demolition. Allegedly the blocks (which were actually donated by LEGO) are going to be used for charity builds in the future. So yeah, that's a silver lining. But not a silver panty liner! Which, haha, HORF HORF HORF HORF HORF.
Hit the jump for several more shots of the sadness.
Sep 17 2009 Unlimited Possibilities: LEGO Baseplate Shirt
The LEGO Brick Construction Shirt from ThinkGeek is a $18 shirt with a LEGO baseplate fashioned to the chest. You can build whatever the hell you want on the front of that bitch. I'm gonna build a functional rocketship on mine!
Take your favorite construction blocks of choice (LEGO™, PixelBlocks, Mega Bloks, K'NEX Bricks™ are all compatible) then start building. You can write messages, incorporate minifigs, build 3-D structures with gears, add motors... the mind boggles. The only limit is your imagination and the amount of weight you can deal with on the front of your shirt.
I figure I'm good for a solid 40lbs of weight on the front of my chest. And not just cause I carried a baby raptor full-term, but I totally did. Sucker burst out of my chest like an alien and ate the cat! I swear, what a little rascal.
Product Site
via
Lego Baseplate Shirt May Be the Dorkiest Shirt Ever Made [gizmodo]
Aug 2 2009 You Did It Wrong: Building Demolition Fail
This is a video of a building demolition in Turkey (arguably my favorite country on rye) gone horribly wrong. Now I'm not saying I could have done better, but I totally could have. With fireworks.
Thanks to Lord Tarl, who once imploded a building simply by looking at it funny (and secretly pushing the detonator).
Jul 24 2009 Man Climbs Building With DIY Vacuum Gloves
This is a video of inventor Jem Stansfield climbing the exterior of a BBC building to show off a pair of vacuum gloves he made out of an old vacuum. Amazingly, he gets to the top, but I question how much assistance he got from the rope holder. Also, if those gloves are that strong and made out of a crappy old vacuum, imagine Dyson-powered vacuum gloves. It would suck the paint off a building! And, God willing, I would eat those paint chips.
Man climbs building with vacuum gloves [bbcnews]
Thanks to Ross, who once made vacuum boots but didn't tie them tight enough and plummeted eight stories.
May 29 2009 46-Foot Long Self-Supporting LEGO Bridge
In an attempt to create the world's longest self-supporting LEGO bridge, a group of LEGOphiles in Australia have constructed this 46-foot long behemoth as part of the 2009 Australia Model Railway Expo. Now I'm not suggesting we start building real bridges out of LEGO, but I mean, we definitely should. And, to give you an idea of just how large this thing is, it's 46-feet. That's like ten of my penises laid out. Widthwise. Lad-- no?
Hit the jump for two more shots.
Continue Reading " 46-Foot Long Self-Supporting LEGO Bridge "
May 14 2009 How To Quit: The Best Resignation EVER
Now you see folks, THAT is how you quit a job. Remember: the goal whenever leaving an organization is to ensure it crumbles behind you as you walk out the door. So, at that very moment, your employer realizes just how under-appreciated you were. And then is crushed under the rubble.
Hit the jump for three more resignations, which were all part of Cracked's 'I Quit' Photoshop contest.
Jan 7 2009 Casting Call For New Discovery Science Channel Game Show 'Catch It Keep It'
Remember the last time I announced a casting call for a show? Did any of you actually apply? Is 'Super Testing' on the air? Has it started yet? I have no idea, I only watch educational programming. Sexeducational programming. HIYO! Porn basically. Anyway, here's the chance for you Geekologie readers to prove yourselves, and show the billions of [fact check this] Discovery Networks Science Channel viewers what you're made of!
Producers for a Discovery Science Game show are looking for contestants. Contestants can be a gonzo engineer/scientist or just a high-energy, creative, fun, builder!
They are looking for garage warriors (builders, scientists, inventors, engineers, carpenters, welders, mechanics, architects, etc...) who love to invent new gadgets, build robots, racing power tools, weld together bizarre machines that drive, fly, climb, shoot flames or launch projectiles.This Game Show is for thinkers, dreamers and doers, who are eager to let their inner MacGyvers be seen and ready to collaborate with a team of other builders to beat the clock in order to "save" the big prize!
Holy shit, I'd be perfect for this! I can hardly wait! I'm gonna be building the coolest stuff. All LEGO too! And there's a big prize involved! I love big prizes! Well, as long as they're not in the form of penises. Oh boy, oh boy! Do you think it's gold bullion? Cold hard cash? I don't know but I can hardly wait to find out! Pick me, pick me! Oh, wait, there's more.
Consumption of alcohol prohibited during challenges.
F*** that. It might just be the booze talking, but I love booze.
Dec 23 2008 Building A Low Carb Gingerbread House
With meat instead of gingerbread! And not just any meat -- deliciously processed meat. Mmmm! The whole abode is held together with a delectable mortar, which you can make yourself using the following recipe:
Wifezilla's Low carb "Meat House" Mortar2 8oz packages of cream cheese
1/4 cup palm oil
1 package onion soup mix
Blend all ingredients together until smooth and creamy. All to sit in the refrigerator for an hour or so to let the onion flavor blend with the cheese.
Mix that shit up, throw some sausage logs and Slim Jims together, and BAM! -- your very own meat cabin. And speaking of which, I once stayed with twelve other dudes in a single room on a ski trip. It was homoerotic to say the least. A full blown orgy complete with ski poles and goggles to say the most.
Hit the jump for a couple more of the yummy.
Dec 23 2008 60,000 Piece LEGO Hoth Battle Diorama
Sorry for the unusual lack of postage in the past few days, folks. I've been traveling my ass off (read: cover up for male enhancement surgery) and had to post via message in a bottle. But I'm back and ready to Geek the ologie. Look out! Anyway, Mark Borlase went and built himself a wicked Hoth battle diorama out of 60,000 LEGO blocks. Sure most of those are contained in the massive cave, but still, damn.
As the headline says, the 5′X10′ diorama is comprised of 60,000 Lego bricks. It cost creator Mark Borlase about $3,000 and four years of construction time to complete.
There's also the 50 LED lights that illuminate the Echo Base hangar and bacta tank with a soothing blue. Motorized AT-AT wenches and a fully operational hanger door top off this gorgeous pile of eye candy.
Four years of construction! The freaking Egyptian pyramids were built in less time (note to self: verify this). Seriously though, Mark, great freaking job. Mind if I come over and PEW PEW with the diorama a bit? Oh come on, I'll bring cookies. Laced cookies. Haha -- you got me, they're just doilies.
Hit the jump for a couple more pictures and a link to the massive Flickr gallery.
Sep 3 2008 Robotic Spider To Destroy Liverpool On Friday
A 50-foot robotic spider, which has been sitting dormant on the side of an office building since last night, is going to come alive on Friday and destroy the everliving shit out of Liverpool.
Weighing 37 tons and standing 50ft high, the spider is currently clinging to the side of Concourse Tower in the city.
The huge insect spotted in Liverpool is in fact entirely mechanical and part of a new piece of street theater organized to mark its year as Capital of Culture.It is thought the insect will come down from its current position tomorrow and then 'wake up' on Friday before starting to explore the city.
Tens of thousands of visitors are expected in Liverpool over the three days to try and see the mechanical arachnid.
Make that tens of thousands of soon to be dead visitors. Seriously, would you rather take your chances trying to catch a glimpse of a giant robotic spider or, I dunno, live? You're still gonna go see it aren't you? Haha, I can read you like a graphic novel.
Hit the jump for several more pictures of the last thing a buch of Liverpudlians will ever see.
Continue Reading " Robotic Spider To Destroy Liverpool On Friday "
Aug 26 2008 A Million Person Pyramid To Be Built?
Well, we've seen London's 100,000 person tower concept, and Japan's 1,000,000 person pyramid of doom, and now, unsurprisingly, Dubai wants in on the action. Dubai-based architecture firm Timelinks has developed plans for a million person ziggurat. What the hell's a ziggurat? "A ziggurat was a temple tower of the ancient Mesopotamian valley and Iran, having the form of a terraced pyramid of successively receding stories or levels. Some modern buildings with a step pyramid shape have also been termed ziggurats."
It may sound like just another concept that'll never be a reality, but Timelinks already set about patenting the design as well as the technology that would make it possible. The structure, nearly a whole square mile by design, would use a combination of steam, wind, and other alternative energy-gathering methods to keep itself entirely off the grid. There would also be "green spaces" that would provide the pyramidal city with agricultural space, to provide food and green-based commerce.
Hey, I'm all for a million person pyramid. But how about some $25,000 pyramid?
"You're a failure. I want to sleep with my cycling instructor. Your penis is four sizes too small."
Things my girlfriend tells me, FTW!
The Dubai Ziggurat: 1 million living souls in a pyramid, entirely self-contained [dvice]
Aug 19 2008 Eye Candy: The Burj Dubai Nears Completion
The Burj Dubai tower, tallest building in the world, is soon to be completed. So photographer David Hobcote took a bunch of high-res pictures from the air to commemorate the 2,087 ft structure. As you can see, the results are breathtaking. And, if you don't start again, potentially lifetaking.
Hit the jump for several more of the ridiculousness.
Continue Reading " Eye Candy: The Burj Dubai Nears Completion "
Aug 14 2008 Taj Mahal: Largest LEGO Set Ever Created
Dwarfing even the 5,195 piece Millennium Falcon, comes LEGO's newest, and largest, set ever: The Taj Mahal. Weighing in at 5,922 pieces, the $300 set ships mid September. But the thing that gets me is that it's only 20" wide and 16" tall. That's not very big.
The famous Taj Mahal palace of India is known all over the globe for its incredible beauty and elegance. Now you can recreate this modern wonder of the world for yourself! Designed for experienced builders, the LEGO Taj Mahal model features advanced building techniques, rare elements and colors, and realistic details of architecture. With over 5,900 pieces, the Taj Mahal makes an awesome addition to any LEGO collection!
As I'm sure many of you know, Taj Mahal is actually a mausoleum built by Emperor Shah Jahan for his favorite wife. Touching, I may build this set in remembrance of a favored pet. But the wife -- Pfft -- she'll be lucky to get a DUPLO grave marker.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots and a link to the product page.
Continue Reading " Taj Mahal: Largest LEGO Set Ever Created "
Aug 14 2008 That's Freaking Huge!: Scale Model Shanghai
This is a scale model of what Shanghai will look like in 2020 if they complete all the buildings slated to be up by that time. The model takes up over 1,000 square feet and resides on the third floor of the Shanghai Urban Planning Museum. Pretty impressive Shanghai, but I completed a much larger scale model years ago. It was 1:2 scale replica of one of my nuts. Sadly, it was too big to display in the backyard. And that, students, is where the moon came from. This concludes your astronomy lesson for the day, tomorrow: how I invented black holes.
Hit the jump for several more worthwhile shots of the model.
Continue Reading " That's Freaking Huge!: Scale Model Shanghai "
Jul 24 2008 LEGO Sushi, It's What's (Not) For Dinner
Ever had a really crappy day at work only to come home to a nagging wife and a burnt grilled cheese sandwich? Well multiply that by 1,305 and you'll have an idea what the last five years of my life have been like. Can a man not get some LEGO sushi and a carafe of peace and quiet for once in his God-forsaken life? Apparently not. And that, my friends, is why I'm jumping.
UPDATE: Damnit, I think I rolled my ankle. When it's better I'll try again. And this time I'm stacking a chair on top of the doghouse.
Hit the jump for some delectable closeups.
Continue Reading " LEGO Sushi, It's What's (Not) For Dinner "
Jun 25 2008 Rotating Skyscraper To Be Built In Dubai
A rotating skyscraper is slated to be built in, wait for it -- Dubai! The structure, designed by Italian architect David Fisher, has floors that can each rotate independently of one another. Allegedly the building will be powered entirely by wind and solar energy via outer solar panels and wind turbines between the floors. I'm curious to see how that works out. I'm also curious how you and your neighbors decide who gets the ocean view and when. I'm guessing it involves threats and/or a good amount of weapon brandishing. Condos are currently going for about $3,000 per square foot but don't bother calling to ask -- I already did and the bastards aren't selling 1' x 1's.
Hit the jump for a VIDEO including some computer animations of the buildng and an interview with the architect.
Continue Reading " Rotating Skyscraper To Be Built In Dubai "
Jun 24 2008 The 730-Ton Ball That Keeps The Taipei 101 Earthquake Tolerant Is Pretty Big, Heavy
The Taipei 101, once the world's tallest building, sits a paltry 600 feet from a fault line. So is the structure doomed? Nope -- it's rocking a uni-ball of steel.
To counteract the forces working against it, architects installed a $4 million, 730-ton tune massed damper, which is a big ball 18 feet in diameter, made of 41 steel plates, and suspended by strong cables 3 1/2-inches think. It's said to cut down on the swaying of the building by almost 40%.
Pretty cool stuff there. Anything that keeps buildings standing and people safe during an earthquake is A-okay in my book. Even if it is a 730-ton ball. Which, incidentally, explains why I've never taken a fall. *wink* Ladies?
Hit the jump for some more pictures, an animation of how the damper works, along with a video of the ball in action during the recent Chinese earthquake.
