Jun 4 2009 I Want: Turbo Heather XTreme Racedoll
Why didn't we have cool toys like this when I was growing up? I only had one toy. And now I have wolf palm and bottle-cap glasses.
Look out! Here come the Extreme Radio-Controlled Southern Belles! [dvice]
Thanks to whoever sent me this last week, hit me up again and I'll give you a proper what-for.
Sep 11 2008 Wait, What?: High Heels For Babies
Heelarious High Heels are your baby girl's first precious step to a life of stripping. Made for infants 0-6 months old, the $35 shoes practically guarantee a future in exotic entertainment. Okay, so they're actually just crib shoes that have a foam heel, but still, I think we can all agree this is fundamentally wrong. Thankfully, I'll never have a daughter -- I always insist my girlfriend be on top.
FUTURE UPDATE: Wow, three girls in a row. Seriously, this woman on top thing just isn't freaking working. So, to you parents of boys out there -- how did you do it? Is the secret in the butt? Just wink one brown eye if it is. I knew it!
Official Website
Thanks to Melanie, who grew up wearing rocket boots and is now an astronaut.
Sep 2 2008 11-Year Old Girl Field Strips And Reassembles AR-15 Rifle In Less Than A Minute
This is a video of 11-year old Mackenzie disassembling and reassembling an AR-15 in less than a minute. Her father made the video as a PSA to let any middle schoolers out there know that, if you break little Mackenzie's heart, she's gonna murder your whole family.
Once Again, We See That Girls Mature Faster Than Boys [gizmodo]
Mar 4 2008 Little Boy Calls Himself 'Magneto Man', Breaks Computers, Is Proud, Thinks He's Famous
Joe Falciatano III (of the Falciatano dynasty) is 12-years old and has broken 12 computers in his school's computer lab. They thought it had something to do with magnetism, but it's now believed to be a static issue related to his over-insulated shoes. Personally, I think it's because his mom banged Magneto while the X-Men were on vacation. That's just my theory though (which is correct). He even calls himself "Magneto Man", despite being 12-years old and unable to produce facial hair. Finally some brainiac, whose intelligence is undoubtedly up there with the likes of Einstein, suggested he wear an anti-static wrist strap. Lo and behold the problems stopped! Now, call me crazy, but why did it take 12 broken computers to finally get the kid to wear a freaking wrist strap? Wow, computer lab teacher. Wow. If a kid broke one computer in my lab they'd be wearing a lot more than a wrist strap. Namely a size 12 Puma up their ass. I love kids.
Video report after the jump.
Sep 14 2007 Zeno The Robot Boy Will Kill You
Zeno, a robot boy created by David Hanson, is scary as hell. David named the damn thing after his real 18-month-old son, Zeno (poor kid), and it is supposed to be available for commercial sale in the next three years (for $200 - $300). It stands 17 inches tall and weighs 6 pounds, and took 5 years to create. He comes equipped with facial recognition software, and will greet you by name when he recognizes you. He is controlled wirelessly via PC, and can talk, walk, and make eye contact. His face is made of "frubber", enabling a variety of facial expressions, which he uses himself because he has "his own moods" and makes "his own decisions". He is one scary little bastard. Is it just me, or does anybody else get the feeling that one of those decisions may be stabbing your f'ing eyes out one night?
A couple more frightening pics after the jump.
UPDATE: A scary as hell video added!
