Aug 11 2009 Who Needs Humans?: One Program Makes Mario Levels, Another Program Plays Them

This is a video of an artificial intelligence program playing a Mario level created by another program that can create infinite variations of levels on its own. Obviously, this is how robots will entertain themselves after there are no more humans to torture. Well, this and massive oil-fueled orgies.

Infinite Mario AI [collegehumor]

Thanks to jimmy, who can design and play Mario levels flawlessly with genuine intelligence. None of that artificial crap for him.

Jun 17 2009 It's Been Fun: Teaching AI How To Kill Us All

In one of the sickest and twistedest announcements I've read in recent history, programmers attending the Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers symposium will attempt to program AI to destroy us all in a game of DEFCON.

Part of the symposium is a sort of "Turing Test" challenge, in which contestants program an AI to play a videogame. The objective is to try to trick a panel of human judges into thinking the AI is a human player.

This year's videogame is DEFCON, the brilliant nuclear war strategy game from indie developer Introversion.

A group of talented programmers will pitch their DEFCON bot against enemy bots in a series of one-on-one thermonuclear chess games. The winner is the programmer whose bot successfully annihilates its opponents and racks up the highest death count. IEEE is offering a $500 prize to the deadliest DEFCON AI bot competition winner.

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! Like I don't have enough to worry about without people programming artificial intelligence to kill us all. You KNOW the robots are behind this. And also, BEHIND YOU -- DUCK! *pew pew* I just saved your life. No need to thank -- actually, yes, sing my praises. *cocking laser blaster* DO IT!

Symposium will teach AIs how to wage nuclear war [fidgit]

Thanks Kenny, shall we play a game?

Feb 26 2009 Cleverbot: Arguably Clever, Wants Us To Die

Cleverbot is a stupid little AI website where you can go and converse with a moronic computer. I asked it all kinds of questions and it didn't know jack. One time I even asked if it wanted me to punch it in the teeth and it said yes! Granted, getting punched in the mouth by yours truly is an honor, but still. Anyway, Geekologie loyalist Josh was getting all philosophical with the bot when it turned on him. I hope this serves as an example for the rest of you: if you play with fire, you're gonna lose your eyebrows. Haha, you look funny.

Cleverbot

Thanks Josh, I'm sure they'll grow back.

Feb 19 2009 This Has Gotten Way Out Of Hand: Army Robots Will Require A 'Warrior Code'

How many times do I have to emphasize that I am not kidding about a robot apocalypse? Did the Terminator series teach us nothing besides Arnold Schwarzenegger should run for governor? Now, in a recent report by the US Navy, it has been suggested that robots participating in battle be programmed with a 'Warrior Code' to help prevent destruction of the entire human potato-sack race.

"There is a common misconception that robots will do only what we have programmed them to do," Patrick Lin, the chief compiler of the report, said. "Unfortunately, such a belief is sorely outdated, harking back to a time when . . . programs could be written and understood by a single person." The reality, Dr Lin said, was that modern programs included millions of lines of code and were written by teams of programmers, none of whom knew the entire program.

It's been suggested we use Isaac Asimov's Three Rules Of Robotics as a starting point for the 'Warrior Code'. Isaac's Rules were as follows:

1 A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm

2 A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law

3 A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law

Being the Geekologie Writer, I got a sneak peak at the Warrior Code in progress, and I've got to say, not good:

1 There is no warrior code

2 PEW PEW

3 PEW PEW

Military's killer robots must learn warrior code [timesonline]
and
Experts Warn of 'Terminator'-Style Military-Robot Rebellion [foxsnews]

Thanks to Bryan, Chris, timgrab, T6000 (what are you doing here!?), Matt, Sprite and Thumperchica, who are all smart enough to know this is life or death, but not smart enough to know I just stole their identities. Hello, credit cards!

Jul 30 2008 Sure, Why Not: Trees As Artists

British artist Tim Knowles ties markers and brushes to tree limbs and makes the helpless botanical bastards create art.

In collaboration with the wind and local weather conditions, calligraphic gestures and automatic drawing readings are recorded on paper. The amazing thing about Knowles' Tree Drawings is the unmistakable signatures that each drawing reveals as an indication of the unique characteristics and even genus/species of a specific tree.

Interesting. Ooooh, nice work Mr. Pine, another, um, turd. While I find the actual art of questionable merit (my maple could do so much better), I do love the photos of the trees painting. Regardless of my personal feelings, I do hope this style of art sells. Tell me I didn't just staple a Sharpie to my penis for nothing.

Hit the jump for several more pictures.

Continue Reading " Sure, Why Not: Trees As Artists "

Sep 18 2007 Delicate Touch Robot Hand Plays Nice

Intel scientists working at a Seattle lab have developed a technology they're dubbing "pre-touch", which consists of a number of electric-field proximity sensors. These sensors are used to determine the conductive properties of an object prior to touching it, to help assess what kind and how strong a grip is necessary. Just imagine that dangling ball in the picture to be, well, your testicles (or female equivalent). Now do you want that sexy robot hand to bear down on you like vice grips, or would you prefer the gentle caress of a spring breeze, and maybe a little tickling action? Exactly. If you answered one you're a sicko.

Delicate Touch Robot Hand Plays Nice [therawfeed]