Aug 18 2009 God Bless Ameriiiiiiiica: Preamble Of The Constitution In Vanity License Plates
This is the Preamble to the Constitution on license plates (all 50 states and Washington DC). And in case you aren't hip to special needs L337 speak, here's how it reads:
We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.
USA! USA! USA! Truthfully, this piece is actually OLD. It was created by Mike Wilkins in 1987 and is on display at the Smithsonian. Which I might have actually seen if I didn't always shoot straight towards the museum of natural history. BUT ONLY BECAUSE THE STREET VENDORS AROUND THERE HAVE THE BEST FALAFEL. I kid, I kid, I bang the dinosaur skeletons. Also, which ever one of you jerks keeps stealing my 'GK WRITR' license plates better stop before I give it to you. And I don't mean 'the business' either. Yes I do. BUT LIKE IN PRISON.
Preamble [ordinaryfinds]
Thanks to Matt, who tried to recreate the Gettysburg Address in license plates but stopped at 4 SCR. Valiant effort, Matt.
Jul 21 2009 American Robots Are Celebrating Today
Be quiet for a second. You hear that? It's your Roomba singing "Oh Happy Day" because today marks the 25th anniversary of the first robotic death in the United States. That's right -- on July 21st, 1984, a factory worker was crushed to death by a robot in Jackson, Michigan. A moment of silence, please. Now, a moment of yelling. I HATE YOU YOU STUPID METALLIC ASSASSINS I WANT YOU ALL TO DIIIIIIIIIE! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE, GHAAAAAAA!!! Okay, so I think I just popped a blood vessel. Also, a boner. Yelling makes me so hot!
July 21 [wordiq]
Thanks to Mike, who will be holding a candlelight vigil/Roomba burning party/kegger tonight in honor of the first U.S. victim.
Jun 16 2009 Death Is No Match For Captain America
That's right folks, like a phoenix rising from the ashes of a burnt comic, the original Captain America is coming back for more ass-kicking action.
"REBORN is the next chapter in the larger story that I've been building in [CAPTAIN AMERICA] since issue #1," explains the writer, who launched this current volume in 2004. "This is a chance to really explore how things have changed in the years since Steve's death and really delve deep into who Steve Rogers is and why he became Captain America. It's a really a [story] with two or three different plotlines that all intertwine, which is a lot of fun and allows us to have [both] in-your-face action and quiet character moments."
"We've been planning the story of Cap's return virtually from the moment that he died"
Wow, does nobody stay dead anymore? I mean, Jesus. Seriously, you started this.
Reborn Revealed [marvel] (click for a much more detailed look at the series)
Thanks to FDSY, who plans to zombie it up himself someday.
May 19 2009 *PEW PEW* GLUG GLUG: The Beer Gun
As a man-child who's no stranger to chugging beers and puking on himself and then losing a shoe and cell phone only to find them both in the kitchen trash the next morning, I love beer. Like, love it, love it. But only bottles, not cans (cut me once, shame on you, cut me twice SHAME ON YOU AGAIN, YOU ARE A TERRIBLE LOVER!). Also, I really like guns because the very heart of George 'Sawed-Off' Washington beats inside my chest. So anyway, this 22 Machine Gun Glass stands 18-inches tall and is by far the coolest thing to drink out of besides boobies. *ahem* Ladies -- I'm a little parched over here. What? I WANT STRONG BONES!
Submachine gun beer bong, a weapon for those who must be forced to guzzle [coonessroundup]
