Feb 22 2009 Roll One Up, America: Obama Sushi Rolls

These are apparently sushi rolls made to look like US president Barack Obama. I think I speak for all of us when I say: the president has never tasted so good. Haha, shut up Monica -- your opinion doesn't count! HIYO.

Hit the jump for a couple more pictures including one of a massive Obama sushi display.

Continue Reading " Roll One Up, America: Obama Sushi Rolls "

Feb 8 2009 Bond Would Be Ashamed: A Lighter Spycam

Ever wanted to covertly record six-hours of the inside of your pants pocket? Well now you can thanks to Ajoka's Real Lighter DVR Lighter Camera Hidden Digital Video Recorder Micro Camera. Jesus, hell of a product title there. The thing costs about $150 wholesale and "discreetly records 640 x 480 or QVGA in AVI format at 30 frames per second and supports microSD up to 8GB. It's got a lithium ion battery for 6 hours of filming and is charged via USB." Interesting, but I've tried smoking before and nope: the girls still run screaming from the locker room.

Cigarette lighter camera shows there's nothing more patriotic than espionage [engadget]

Thanks to Justin, who wasn't really that into Miss Moneypenny but double-oh sixty-nine'd her anyways just to spite Mr. Bond.

Jan 26 2009 Interchangeable Ties: An Obama Action Figure

This presidential action figure is certainly a step above Chia Obama. Available in Japan, Action Obama comes complete with interchangeable ties, hands, and weaponry. He can hold an American flag, microphone, gun, katana, and even a lightsaber. He cannot, however, hold a bachelor party for shit. WHERE WERE THE STRIPPERS, BARACK? I swear.

Random Japanese Obama Action Figure [buzzfeed]

Thanks to Jacen, Ray, MechanicalApe, John and Brit, who are all too old to play with action figures but still do because they're that cool.

Jul 16 2008 Tempest Storm, Born 1928, Still Stripping

Tempest Storm was born in 1928 by some other name and was stripping by 1950. And guess what -- she's still at it. And, oh, I just puked a little.

"I don't just get up there and rip my clothes off," she says.

Indeed, the 80-year-old burlesque queen takes her clothes off very slowly.

Her act is a time capsule. She knows nothing of poles. She would never put her derriere in some man's face. Her prop of choice is a boa, perhaps the occasional divan.

It takes four numbers, she says adamantly, four numbers to get it all off. To do it classy.

I disagree Tempest, three minutes is about all the class I can stand. Anyway, the geriatric Storm claims she dated Elvis and regularly danced for the likes of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Mickey Rooney, Nat King Cole, and The Geekologie Writer's great-grandfather. Okay, the puke dribble has developed into a full fledged projectile vomit, so I'm gonna have to wrap things up here with another quote.

Oh my God, I'm emptying my whole stomach.

Ha, I quoted myself. Hit the jump for two more pictures, but a warning: one is from the back (waist up) and shows her in her stripping outfit. It's definitely suitable for work, but not for a mere mortal's eyes. You have been warned. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I WARNED YOU. WARNING, WARNING! DANGER, WILL ROBINSON! F*** it, lose your sight, I don't care.

Hit it if you're cool with blindness.

Continue Reading " Tempest Storm, Born 1928, Still Stripping "