Sep 21 2009 Not For Airline Travel: Ninja Kunai USB Drive
A dangerously metal USB drive shaped like a ninja knife, it just makes sense. The 2GB Ninja Kunai drives cost $125 and are in no way, shape or form safe for airplane travel. Or train. Now that I think about it, I wouldn't even drive anywhere with one. Because I used to keep a little pen knife on my keychain and now I push the gas with a peg. Which brings me to an important point: Pirate for hire. Now I know what you're thinking, and yes, I do bachelor parties.
Ninja Kunai USB Drive: the tech equivalent of getting a foreign language tattoo [engadget]
Thanks to Harrison, who once stabbed a foe with a traditional USB drive and lost all his data.
Aug 22 2009 High Security: USB Drive Has Number Lock
Worried about somebody getting at the precious files on you flash drive? Try keeping it in your pocket and not leaving it on the bus. But if you're really worried you should handcuff it to your wrist like a briefcase filled with pirate treasure. Alternatively, get a Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive ($99).
[The drive] features a built in num keypad that requires you to enter a pin code before you can access your data. It is the 256bit encryption, if someone try to access your data by forcing access, the Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive will automatically destroy all data stored on the drive. However, if you do worry that you'll forget your PIN you can back everything up online, and there's also an optional PIN replacement assistance service available too.
Wow, that seems pretty intense. You must have some seriously serious files in order to require this much security. What are you, a spy? And, if so, how about hooking me up with a bow tie camera?
Personal Pocket Safe USB Drive [likecool]
Thanks to Ste, who keeps his data protected the old fashioned way: with hungry lions.
Aug 18 2009 I See You, Little Stuff!: A USB Microscope
Hey guys I'm getting kicked out my hotel (which is fine because it's a shithole and caught fire yesterday) so I have to relocate. I'll be back this afternoon with more posts though, I promise. In the meantime, here's a $130 USB powered microscope.
This week e-Supply Japan announced the EEA-MAN1011, an digital USB microscope to use with a PC. It's powered by a 2Mpix censor manufactured in by Sanyo Japan with a 5x to 150x zoom.
Oh man, I want one. Remember the first time you ever looked at something under a microscope? What was it? Mine was a scab. And no, I didn't eat it afterwards. It's not eating if you swallow something whole!
e-Supply Japan's New USB Microscope [akihabaranews]
Thanks to naas, who once looked at a fingernail clipping under a microscope and never bit his nails again.
Jul 27 2009 Eye Candy: Luke Skywalker USB Drive
This is a custom made Luke Skywalker (circa Empire Strikes Back) USB drive. I assume it's painted modeling clay, but honestly it could be made out of unicorn tears for all I know. What an amazing job the artist did though -- such an expressive face. It's like you can hear him screaming, "WHY'D SHE HAVE TO BE MY SISTER!?!"
Hit the jump for several more shots of the expressiveness.
Jun 19 2009 It Was Only A Matter Of Time: 128GB Flashes
That's right, the folks over at Kingston are about to drop a 128GB flashbomb on the world. Available next month, the 128GB DataTraveler 200 will cost a staggering $547. SO DON'T WASH IN IN YOUR JEANS. Still, 128GB -- do you realize how much porn that is? *ahem* Me neither.
Kingston's Flash Drives Hit 128GB [uberreview]
Jun 18 2009 Eye Of The Tiger, Baby: Rocky III USB Drives
Looking to add a little homoerotic flair to your computer? How about the characters from Rocky III performing sit ups in a USB port? Available in Apollo Creed, Rocky and Clubber Lang (who's making the best face) varieties, the $30 port-humpin' fools are sure to get a rise out of coworkers. Or should I say, a sit up. Rise? Okey-dokey.
Rocky III USB drives sadly missing Burgess Meredith version [engadget]
Thanks to STOMPY, Julian, MoD and thedevine1, who all received the Presidential Fitness Award in middle school.
Jun 9 2009 USB Microwave Is World's Smallest, For Beans
The Heinz Beanzawave is being billed as the world's smallest microwave and measures a scant 7.4 inches tall by 6.2 inches wide and 5.9 inches deep. It's equally suited for heating a can of beans/soup at your desk or frying your nuts so you can't have children.
The mini microwave is being developed as a partner to Heinz Snap Pots, baked beans in single-serving containers. The Snap Pots, available in the U.K., fit perfectly into the Beanzawave. But the $160 device will only be released commercially if consumer feedback is positive and if component prices drop in the near future.
Well you can count me on board. I'M ON A BOAT! Just kidding, I wish I was though. No, right now I'm just laying in bed topless braiding my penises. Now where'd I put that scrunchie?
Beanzawave: The World's Smallest Microwave [fastcompany]
Thanks to scottsc, who cooks his beans at work the old fashioned way: on a campfire in the boardroom.
May 23 2009 Delicious: The Spoonful Of Cereal USB Drive
This is a USB drive that looks like a spoonful of cereal. And, just like Mary Poppins would say, "a spoonful of cereal helps the....WHY ARE THERE GRAPE NUTS IN MY LAPTOP, YOU LITTLE BITCHES?!?"
Hit the jump to see a video of the cereal in action.
Continue Reading " Delicious: The Spoonful Of Cereal USB Drive "
May 19 2009 More Than Meets The Eye: Transformer USB Drive Is Awesomest I've Seen In A While
What do you buy for the man who has nothing? While you ponder that nugget of vast intellectuality, I'll tell you about this 2GB Transformer memory stick (which is way better than these ones). Probably the awesomest USB drive I've seen in forever, the unit transforms from a normal looking USB ding-dongle into Ravage, a fierce jungle cat Decepticon (which some believe to be a dog, WHICH HE IS NOT YOU WILL NOT RUIN MY CHILDHOOD). Available fro pre-order from the BigBadToyStore, this piece of badassery will set you back $43 and ships in September. But the question remains: shouldn't you avoid trusting a Decepticon with your porno?*
*Does Optimus Prime piss transmission fluid and wipe his ass with corrugated steel?**
**Bumblebee says so!
Product Page
via
Transforming Ravage Flash Drive [ohgizmo]
Thanks to Tank and Julian, who once convinced a Decepticon it was human and then broke its heart with a backhoe.
May 18 2009 Geekologie Reader Make USB Gluestick
Young Geekologie Reader Izzy Slypig went and made himself a 1GB gluestick flashdrive. It rotates up and out of the container as you twist the bottom. That is all. But, if you've ever wanted to steal computer files from preschool, now's your chance.
Hit the jump for three more shots of the drive in various states of twist.
Mar 31 2009 Puff Puff Pass: USB Smokeless Cigarettes
Need a nicotine fix but can't leave your cube? No problem! Puff on a Health E-Cigarette from Thanko! Identical to pretty much ever other electronic cigarette out there, the $30 device "uses a heating element to vaporize a nicotine solution to supposedly give you a purer smoking experience", which is just fancy marketing jargon for, "short-circuit and burn your office to the ground". Trust me folks, I hold a Master's in Marketing. And also, Lovemaking. You see this? You see this move I'm doing right now? Senior thesis, baby.
Thanko's USB-powered Health E-Cigarettes sound healthy [engadget]
Thanks to Julian, who once got caught smoking a tampon in the boy's room because some upperclassmen told him it was a cigar.
Mar 15 2009 Guy Loses Finger, Replaces With Flash Drive
Jerry Jalava is a hacker who lost half his left ring finger in a motorcycle accident and decided to replace the digit with a USB drive. So now he sports a rubber half-finger with thumb(!)drive inside. Awesome. Plus, if he ever has to wear a wedding ring it won't count because it's not a real finger. Am I right? Because that's why I cut mine off. Just kidding, I was really high and trying to make a bong in shop class.
Hit the jump for three more shots of the digital digitry.
Continue Reading " Guy Loses Finger, Replaces With Flash Drive "
Mar 3 2009 I'm Having A Heavy Day: USB Tampon Drives
These flash drives are real products from meninos that look like tampons and come in several sizes so you get just the right fit for your particular data flow. Having a light day? Go with 1GB. Flowing like you've been shot? That's a 16GB day. Available soon, the drives will sell for an undisclosed amount of money. Of course, you could just make your own. But that would involve stealing tampons from your girlfriend. And that's a problem, seeing how you don't have one. BURN! Wait, me neither. Ladies? I have no problem running to the grocery store to buy feminine products. Just sayin'.
meninos shop
via
This is like a "What I did over the summer" essay except it's about giant labias [thebloggess]
Thanks to carolinemichelle, who suggests they make a 32GB variety.
Feb 18 2009 Universal Cell Phone Charger Here By 2012
The major cell phone manufacturers (Apple excluded) have agreed to adopt a universal microUSB charger for cell phones by 2012. And I think I speak for all of us when I say I say, "it's about freaking time!" And also, "can you hear me now?" *slamming balls in dictionary* Jla`#@82[wa;g@!h.!! I deserved that.
As a result of the universal standard, smartphone makers may well end up incorporating both a micro USB adaptor, and a proprietary one for specialist data transfers to their devices. That'll require at least an extra lead or two in the box, losing some of the environmental benefit, and placing a constraint on product designs. Maybe that's why those cellphone makers who agreed to the standard have only promised "the majority" of cellphones will use the connector by 2012, and avoided a binding agreement.
Wow, that seems kind of ridiculous. I hate to break it to you, folks, but I can charge cellphones with my mind. Don't believe me? Take your cell phone out of your pocket and look at it. Does it have a charge? I did that. Now call me, I've got rollover minutes about to expire.
Cellphone Makers Agree on Universal Charger, But is it a Good Idea? [fastcompany]
Thanks to mike and Klye, who charge their phones the way God intended, like a bull.
Jan 14 2009 I'll Take Three, Please: USB Hooter Heaters
I really don't have too much more information on these except they're USB powered boob burners. I think they cost this much: 1,980円. I dunno, they freaking heat your hoo-hoo's, what more do you want from me? Wait a....also, they're a fire hazard. Yes, very dangerous. Funny story, ladies -- I was born with naturally warm hands. And also, a nipple on my back. Too much information?
Product Site
and
Boob Warmer! [rinkya]
Thanks to Laurel and ClaMs, who keep their breasts warm the way God intended, with good old fashioned lightning.
Jan 2 2009 DIY: Make Your Own SNES Cartridge Wallet
Some guy went and made a wallet out of an old SNES game cartridge (that shit better not have been A Link To The Past). The cartridge comes packed with emergency LEDs, videogame sound effects, and enough room to carry cash, cards, keys and a USB memory stick. Granted, it's not the coolest wallet I've ever seen, but I'm biased since I made one out of an entire Wii console. Plus, if i rock it in a front pocket, it makes my junk look bigger. And rectangular-er. Which, according to my latest poll, 6 out of 5 women on the bus find freaky deaky.
Hit the link for a picture of the insides and a link to the Instructable.
Continue Reading " DIY: Make Your Own SNES Cartridge Wallet "
Nov 11 2008 Design Contest Mimobot Flash Drives
Mimoco, the company best known for making cute USB drives (particularly the Star Wars series), recently held a contest in which fans were encouraged to design their own Mimobot and submit them for voting. Well the ballots were cast, and these are (five of the) six winners, each made into a real Mimobot. Available in 1, 2, 4 and 8GB capacities, they'll set you back $25, $35, $50 or $80, respectively. I really want the Russian Cosmonaut myself. And not just because I'm building a rocketship and blasting off to the moon (although I totally am). Nope, I'm just a man that loves good Russian vodka. You ever broken the top off a bottle so you have to finish the whole thing in one sitting? Mmmm, something about the broken glass really makes your stomach bleed.
Oct 6 2008 USB Light Up 'You've Got Mail' Indicator
This is a little $17 USB gadget that lights up whenever you receive new email. It can turn green, blue, or red to indicate which account the mail is from and looks like a little envelope. Neat. Oh, it's blinking! Oh boy, oh boy!
Date: Mon, 06 Oct 2008 07:04:33 +0000
From: "ives abdulkaf" mail@camelbak-deals.com
Subject: Upsize your hotdog into a french loaf
To: tips@geekologie.com
Top 10 sellers for organic pharmacology today
Hell yeah French loaf, I'm starving!
USB webmail notifier lights up your life when you've got mail [engadget]
Thanks to Julian, who receives his email the old fashioned way, by horse.
Oct 1 2008 USB Ferris Wheel Ferrises When You Type!
The USB Key-controlled Ferris Wheel is a little USB peripheral that spins around whenever you're typing and sends a couple cute little animals on a happy fun slide. Thanks to the marvel of modern technology, it can sense when you've stopped typing, and ceases movement. It costs $29 and is guaranteed entertainment for all ages.*
*Ages 5-80 excluded, small parts may pose a choking hazard for the elderly.
Sep 12 2008 Burn Whatever You Want Onto Your Toast. Cha-Ching, eBay Fortune Here I Come!
Similar in concept to the Note Toaster, comes this little marvel of bread heating technology. The brainchild of industrial designer Sung Bae Chang, the Scan Toaster connects to your computer via USB and can burn pretty much whatever the hell you want onto your bread.
The toaster utilizes a network of toasting "modules" -- hot wires that rotate within a 30 degree radius -- that burn the image or text you have selected onto the delicious slice of your choice.
Awesome. Crank out a Virgin Mary or Large Hadron Collider and start raking in the dough on eBay. Or, if you want to get really creative, a giant member spewing butter or jam. Just saying, sex sells. Unfortunately my condo doesn't -- somebody buy this freaking dump already.
Scan Toaster puts the power of 'miracle toast' in the hands of mere mortals [engadget]
Thanks to Julian, who's looking for a lovely lady to butter his bread. And also, make him an omelet.
