May 17 2009 XBox 360/Zune Mashup Device Coming?
Is Microsoft working on a device that combines functionality of the XBox 360 and Zune? I don't even know what the hell that would be, but maybe.
The project, codenamed "xYz," is said to feature a WVGA touchscreen and a way to play music and movies on both the device as well as the Xbox 360. Basically, it's going to be a connected handheld gaming system with rich multimedia features.
Eh. Also, "xYz" -- what a horrible codename. I can already think of like a million better ones. Including, and pretty much limited to, "Project Zune Liquidation".
Jan 10 2008 Taser Features MP3 Player, Hooker Styling
Taser, a company that focuses its efforts on developing products that shock people, is releasing a new line of tasers and had them on display at the CES. The Taser C2 features an MP3 player holster that stores 1GB of music, so you can get your groove on while you watch a would-be attacker wriggle in the street. While this may appeal to some, I have a few bones to pick. First of all, if you're listening to music you're going to be a lot more susceptible to attack, seeing how it would be easier to sneak up on you. And secondly, I tried this system and ended up jolting my penis with 50,000 volts when I tried to skip a song.
Introducing the Taser mp3 player [metro]
Thanks to Sebastian, whose story will never end, for the tip
Jan 8 2008 The 5 Friend MP3 Player Headphone Splitter
Well it looks like I'll be living vicariously though others' posts of the CES due to my wife being a cheapskate and pissing our money away on stupid stuff like "the mortgage" and "food" instead of buying me a plane ticket like a responsible woman would. Up next from the show: the Belkin Rockstar, a headphone splitter that lets you plug up to 5 sets into one MP3 player. The thing comes out in March and will go for right around $20. Why it's called the Rockstar is kind of a mystery to me, unless it's because the thing is star shaped. Because I'm pretty sure real rockstars can each afford their own damn MP3 player. Still a handy device though if you need something for pumping sweet Michael Bolton tunes to the participants in your next circle jerk. Which, I might add, I have never participated in. There were only three of us so it was more a triangle than a circle. Ah, dorm life.
Rockstar MP3 player headphone splitter draws a crowd [dvice]
Sep 27 2007 MP3 Player Cures Acne
It just makes sense. Take an MP3 player, add some sort of facial cleansing ionizer, and boom, best product ever. The Mpion is a 128 MB (!!) MP3 player that you rub on your face to release acne cleansing ions. I love rubbing electronics on my face as much as the next guy, but this thing is ridiculous. I bet it doesn't work. AND it costs $181. "Are you making out with an MP3 player?" "No, I'm cleansing my face and preventing acne." "You're wasting your time." "Damn, you're right. I'm one beat up bitch."
Aug 16 2007 Wind Up Media Player
Wind-up radio inventor Trevor Baylis is now dropping a wind-up media player very cleverly named the Trevor Baylis Eco Media Player. It can be charged via USB or hand crank, and (although I don't believe it) one minute of cranking powers the device for approximately 40 minutes. It has all the features you would expect from a media player (except maybe this one being the size of a brick) and retails for around $350. Someone come up with a gerbil wheel mod for this thing and then you'll be onto something: a media player with a damn gerbil attachment that I still won't buy. Maybe.
Wind Up Media Player [tech.co.uk]
Jul 26 2007 Transformers Bumblebee Speakers
Brando is selling these dancing Transformers Bumblebee speakers for $58.90. The Bumblebee speakers will actually dance to your music and even play it back with Transformers sound effects.
In a twist of customized cool, Bumblebee takes your tunes and plays them back to you with TRANSFORMERS sound effects! Touch Bumblebee to mix beats with your music, or sit back and watch it dance!
The dancing sounds neat, but why would anybody want Transformers sound effects in their music? It'd be like buying a speaker to take a crap in your ear.
Product Page [Brando via Gizmodo]
Jul 5 2007 Tiny Hardwood Speakers
These are tiny little wooden speakers which are made in Korea and cost about $45. Each speaker gives about five hours of playback, although at 1.5 watts per channel they aren't exactly the most powerful speakers on the market. They are, however, the most wood-like. Unless you count the ones I built. Although those are aren't really speakers, they're more like blocks of wood.
