Nov 14 2009 Transfurniture: Couch Turns Into Bunk Bed

Ever wanted a couch that transforms into bunk beds? Me neither. I do want one that turns into a fighter jet though. Okay you got me, I do want a transformer bunk bed. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE SENTIENT OR I WILL DRAG THAT SHIT OUT INTO THE YARD AND BURN IT.

A SOFABED THAT DOES DOUBLE DUTY, Mobelform's Doc folds out into not one, but two twin sized beds stacked one atop the other: in short, a bunk bed. Included are the necessary mattresses as well as a ladder and short rail to prevent mid-night tumbles.

This reminds me of the time my cousin was spending the night and my parents let him sleep in my bunk bed and made me sleep on the floor. Well, he rolled out of the bed in the middle of the night and fell five feet to the ground and didn't even wake up. I thought he was dead. He might have been dead.

Hit the jump for another bed making the transformation.

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Oct 31 2009 Guy Needs 1M Facebook Fans And Girlfriend Will Let Him Turn House Into A Pirate Ship

First of all, the only Facebook group you really need to join is Geekologie's (and NOT The Superficial's). But if you're into joining every group possible you can join this guy's, whose girlfriend has agreed to let him pirate-theme their house if he gets 1,000,000 fans.

I've always wanted to be a pirate, and the onlyway I can truely do this is to live aboard a pirate ship, as I am tied into a house and a mortgage with this house, and I dont live anywhere near the sea, the only thing I can do is to turn my house into a massive pirate ship.

I already have enough money to buy some wooden slats from B&Q, I just need to get my girlfriend to agree to remortgage the house so that I can afford decking, and masts, and eventually sails.

If 1 million people joined this group it would help her understand that this isnt such a bad idea, and lots of people would do it as well, and it would help my dream come true.

If you can leave a piratty message on the wall, it would also help.

I was going to join but then I saw dude already has 988,756 fans, so he's practically there. And by 'there' I mean on my shit-list. NOBODY OUT PIRATE-HOUSES ME!

Facebook Group

Thanks to Nikki, Dan, AJ and Lemrin, who all live in ninja-houses and have vowed to burn dude's pirate house to the ground to prove their stealthy supremacy.

Oct 16 2009 Wicked Transformer Halloween Decorations

This is a video of some guy in Cleveland that made giant Bumblebee and Optimus Prime Halloween decorations. They are most impressive. Granted, some teenage jerks in the neighborhood are gonna wreck them, but they're still cool while they last. Not unlike snowmen. Which, funny story: last winter I saw one with a hotdog for a nose! I mean, who doesn't have carrots?!?! I suspect his eyes were dog turds.

Youtube

Thanks to kat, Dave and Paul, who are all ready to transform and trick-or-treat the hell out.

Oct 12 2009 BEEP BOOP Arrrr!!: Transformer Pirate Shirts

These Piratron shirts come in Autopirate and Deceptipirate models and are perfect for showing your support for both high seas plundering AND vehicles that turn into talking robots at the same time. Each shirt will set you back a cool $20, and I recommend getting one of each just in case, well, I don't know why. Just do it. No I don't profit from these. But seriously, you can't have enough. Buy like thirty. Million. DO IT NOW!

Product Site

Thanks to tim, who agrees that in the battle of pirates vs. robots, the ninjas will prevail.

Oct 2 2009 eBay: Amazing Optimus Prime Action Figure

Up on the auction block is a $45 Hasbro Optimus Prime action figure that's been meticulously modded and painted to match the leader of the Autobot's appearance in Revenge of the Fallen. The level of detail is amazing. Unfortunately, so is the price: bidding is currently at $730 with just under six hours remaining. So yeah, bid away if you want to blow a cool grand this afternoon. But if you want to blow up a cool air mattress, let me now -- I have guests coming to stay the weekend. Now transform and blow till you pass out!

Hit the jump for several more shots, including what the toy looked like before modification.

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Sep 29 2009 I'm Not Sitting On It: Real Robotic Transformer

This is a real-life Transformer (OmniZero.9, the brainchild of Takeshi Maeda) that can morph from a humanoid robot to a humanoid robot that can carry a person, to a wheeled cart. Just watch how scary it is when it moves. If I didn't know better, I'd swear there was a little person in there. But there isn't! Just wires and servos and a metallic heart of death. Which, true story, only beats for the destruction of the human race. And speaking of which: One time I competed in a three-legged race solo.

Hit the jump for a video of the robot battling another, much smaller one.

Continue Reading " I'm Not Sitting On It: Real Robotic Transformer "

Sep 17 2009 Cardboard Optimus Prime Costume On eBay

Well folks, Halloween is right around the corner, and you all know what that means: another night of standing in the corner a sad Ninja Turtle while you watch the Zombie Nurse of your dreams make out with a guy dressed as The Crow. :( Also, fun costumes!

A couple of years back I went slightly mad for 3 weeks and spent every evening and weekend carefully constructing an Optimus Prime costume for a summer party. Summer party came, the costume won me first prize, and hasn't seen the light of day since.

This auction is for that costume (pictured). If you've got a Fancy Dress/Halloween party coming up, this costume will impress - and not just impress Transformers geeks. The time I wore the costume easily equates to that 15 minutes of fame time we're all supposed to get - applause from the packed balcony of random pub goers, women who wouldn't normally give me a second look wanting to have their picture taken with me (the benefit of wearing a cool mask eh...) ;)

Current bidding for the cardboardbot is £11.06 (~$18) with three days remaining. Unfortunately, the costume is for pick up only because "the costume doesn't transform into a lorry and move by itself, so you'll need to come and collect". BWAHAHAHAHA! But seriously, what do you mean it doesn't transform?

eBay Auction

Thanks to Sam, who is selling a cardboard Voltron costume that will get you laid quicker than you can say, "wait, didn't I meet you in the men's room?"

Aug 20 2009 Sweet Costume, Bro: Bumblebee Transformer

If you've been reading Geekologie long enough you may recall the homemade Transformer costume videos I posted way back in October '07 (the dark years). Well this Bumblebee costume is similar, just not made out of cardboard (skip about halfway through to see the transformation). Apparently it's being worn by some poor sap at a car dealership in order to hype some sort of 'Transforming Deals!' promotion. The point is, I need you to help me whip this guy's ass and take that costume. I'm tired of always being a ninja turtle. Psyyyyyyyyche -- TURTLE POWER!

Youtube

Thanks to Yopoleo, who once wore a gorilla suit to promote a mattress store and whistled at girls as they drove by.

Aug 4 2009 Voltromas The Transforming Tank Engine

I like trains, and not just because they go CHOO CHOO. I also like the hobos that jump on them! THAT'S ENOUGH FOR ME, OKAY? Anyway, this is a Thomas the Tank Engine/Voltron mashup toy available from Singapore for around $8. It is in no way shape or form licensed or legal. But it is cool. Everybody's calling it a Transformer but it is clearly a throwback to Voltron. Who, despite being a robot, I still liked as a child because he was rainbow colored and, damnit, I'm a sucker for a rainbow. One time I even got a girlfriend to dress up as Rainbow Bright on Halloween. And not to brag, but she did go home with the handsomest pirate at the party. I was one sad ninja turtle. :(

Hit the jump for a couple more shots.

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Aug 4 2009 Folding Bike Fits Within Circumference Of Tire

24-year old inventor Dominic Hargreaves has designed and built a bike that folds up to the size of the bike's wheels. Not as impressive as a bike that folds up into its own squeaky horn, BUT NOT EVERYONE IS THIS GENIUS.

"I couldn't find a folding bicycle I liked...I wanted something that could take a bit of punishment and that you could have fun with. So I made one myself."

Mr Hargreaves has been in contact with various manufacturers and hopes to get the bike into production soon.

Cool. I've never ridden a folding bike before because I value my safety, but I have ridden a bike with no seat before. It was good times. For both of us.

Inventor's Bike Folds Into Its Own Wheel [yahoonews]

Thanks Pete, now get your top men on a folding jetpack STAT.

Jul 25 2009 Way To Blow Your Cover: Batman Cufflinks

Listen, I know you're classy -- but are you BATMAN CUFFLINKS CLASSY? I think you are, and I'm not just saying that to get in your tux. These cufflinks are made by Etsy seller finkstudio and will set you back a cool (or crumpled -- BUT NOT ROLLED UP) Jackson ($20). Coupled with a 3-Keyboard Cat Moon t-shirt (just tape the links to your wrists), you will enter an all new world of magical magic -- where wizards and mermaids coexist and you are your own boss. Yes, a world where you can still get laid with cufflinks taped to your hands. I've been there. I've seen it.

Hit the jump for some of the other cufflinks available, including Transformers and Spiderman.

Continue Reading " Way To Blow Your Cover: Batman Cufflinks "

Jul 21 2009 Guy Huffs Gas, Gets Tasered, Catches Fire

In a tale of spontaneous human combustion, a man who had been huffing gasoline (real Transformers drink it) was tasered by police and went up in a ball of flames. Sweeeeeet.

Police said they were responding to a complaint at a house when (36-year old Ronald) Mitchell ran outside carrying a cigarette lighter and a plastic bottle containing what they believed was fuel.

When he refused to stop running towards them, one officer Tasered him, police said.

The man was immediately engulfed in flames, but the officer threw him to the ground and smothered the blaze with his hands, the statement said.

Mitchell was charged with assault to prevent arrest and possession of a sniffing substance.

An 18-year-old woman threw rocks at the officer as he tried to help and he was later treated for a cut on his head and burns to his hands, police said.

Ha, that chick brought rocks to a taser fight, what an idiot. And also, am I gonna get arrested for possession of a sniffing substance for this can of gasoline? Because, sorry coppers, that ain't happening! *glug glug glug glug glug* Transform and 7x7 is 35!

Tasered 'Petrol-Sniffer' Bursts Into Flames [yahoonews]

Thanks to Thumperchica, Justin, Jon, Stephen and Ptentacle, who wanted to roast marshmallows on him.

Jul 20 2009 Kid Drinks Gasoline To Be Like Transformer

Some 14-year old kid in China has been drinking gasoline since he was 9 to become more like a Transformer. Unfortunately, he's become more like an idiot moron.

The youngster was so impressed that he began drinking fuel on a daily basis to "obtain energy" and become a mighty warrior like the Transformers.

"Since my son start to drink gas, his intelligence quotient dropped sharply and he couldn't figure out addition and subtraction of sums within 100," the father said. "Before that, he was a very smart boy, and he could even repair the television. But now he doesn't know the answer of 7 plus 17."

To the boy's credit, I don't know what 7 plus 17 is either (87?). Still, I love the smell of gasoline as much as the next guy, but actually drinking it? That's just crazy talk. I love robots. So was that.

Transformers fan drank gasoline to gain energy [russiatoday]
via
Optimus Prime Cocktail [runawaytheologian]

Thanks to Anthony, who once drank bleach to be more like a washing machine.

Jul 13 2009 Come On, 20!: Small Gallery Of Geeky Cakes

This Dungeons & Dragons themed cake and all the others after the jump (including some Zelda, Wolverine, Mario and Transformer action) were created by DeviantART user cakerific. And cakerific they are! I would even go as far as caketastic. And, as the sign on the door said, "Absolutely no outside food or drink permitted in the bar". OH YEAH, THEN HOW'D I JUST MIX A COCKTAIL IN THE BATHROOM? Sense: I make it.

Hit the jump for five more, all of which would look real good in my stomach right now mingling with the sushi. Well hello Mr. Eel Roll, how are you? Spicy.

Continue Reading " Come On, 20!: Small Gallery Of Geeky Cakes "

Jul 6 2009 KILL IT!: Transformer Robot Really Tranforms

Miss me? I missed you. I hope everyone had a safe yet explosive weekend. Amazingly, I'm still alive and fingerful. Let me tell you: it wasn't easy. Now, let's return to our regularly scheduled program, shall we?

NASA, who I used to respect, wants to build a bunch of transformers to do their dirty work. *shaking head* And I used to want be an astronaut.

NASA wanted a robot that could start as 100 blocky modules dropped from an airplane to a desert, reconfigure into a rover that could drive to a sand dune, and then change again to "grow" legs and climb up it. Once the blocky robot reached the top, it would transform into a greenhouse that could protect a group of seeds for two weeks.

Only 20 of the modules were built during an ambitious project more than two years ago. But together, they are known as Superbot.

Now repeat after me, "All hail Superbot!" ZOMG -- A COUPLE OF YOU ACTUALLY DID IT! You make me sick.

Hit the jump to see two of the robot's other configurations.

Continue Reading " KILL IT!: Transformer Robot Really Tranforms "

Jun 20 2009 Pew Pew!: Guy Builds Bumblebee In Yard

As most of you probably know, the original Bumblebee was a Volkswagen Beetle. And as very few of you probably know, I still have the original toy around here somewhere because I'm gangster.

Tom Rhodes likes Transformers. So, naturally, he built an 18-foot-tall, 1,200-pound Bumblebee robot out of an old Volkswagen Beetle.

As you can see, Bumblebee protects Tom's windmill from the Decepticons. Because, fun fact: Decepticons HATE clean energy. Transform and recycle!

Man builds gigantic Bumblebee Transformer in his front yard [dvice]

Thanks to FDSY, who once tried switching the bodies on two of his old Transformer toys but it didn't work BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT G.I. JOE'S.

Jun 18 2009 Eye Of The Tiger, Baby: Rocky III USB Drives

Looking to add a little homoerotic flair to your computer? How about the characters from Rocky III performing sit ups in a USB port? Available in Apollo Creed, Rocky and Clubber Lang (who's making the best face) varieties, the $30 port-humpin' fools are sure to get a rise out of coworkers. Or should I say, a sit up. Rise? Okey-dokey.

Rocky III USB drives sadly missing Burgess Meredith version [engadget]

Thanks to STOMPY, Julian, MoD and thedevine1, who all received the Presidential Fitness Award in middle school.

Jun 3 2009 Just Doing My Job: 2009 Pole Dancing Contest

NOTE: Probably NSFW just because most employers frown on videos of dancers working the pole, but there is no nudity or even thongs, so yeah, use your own discretion (read: push play).

No need to thank me folks, just doing my job. Also, I saw things happen in this video that I didn't think were humanly possible (mostly towards the end). Beautiful things. Think a family of unicorns cresting a double rainbow on the first day of spring, but then replace that with a stripper throwing her hooha around a pole and you've got it.

Youtube

Thanks to Party Kid Transformer and Julia, who can perform all these stunts without the pole because they're both powerful sorcerers.

May 19 2009 More Than Meets The Eye: Transformer USB Drive Is Awesomest I've Seen In A While

What do you buy for the man who has nothing? While you ponder that nugget of vast intellectuality, I'll tell you about this 2GB Transformer memory stick (which is way better than these ones). Probably the awesomest USB drive I've seen in forever, the unit transforms from a normal looking USB ding-dongle into Ravage, a fierce jungle cat Decepticon (which some believe to be a dog, WHICH HE IS NOT YOU WILL NOT RUIN MY CHILDHOOD). Available fro pre-order from the BigBadToyStore, this piece of badassery will set you back $43 and ships in September. But the question remains: shouldn't you avoid trusting a Decepticon with your porno?*

*Does Optimus Prime piss transmission fluid and wipe his ass with corrugated steel?**

**Bumblebee says so!

Product Page
via
Transforming Ravage Flash Drive [ohgizmo]

Thanks to Tank and Julian, who once convinced a Decepticon it was human and then broke its heart with a backhoe.

Mar 16 2009 They're After Our Skinny Coke Whores!: Japanese Unveil Robotic Fashion Model

Developed by Japan's National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology (JAJINAS), HRP-4C is a robot designed to walk, talk, and work a catwalk like the sexy little vixen harbinger of death that she is.

Standing at just over 5-feet tall and 95-pounds....the she-bot features 30 motors spread throughout its body with an additional eight motors in its face for expressing general boredom and disgust with the help. Its main purpose is entertainment and to attract crowds much like its fleshy counterparts -- so don't expect home cooked meals and laundry service should you take the $200,000 robot home.

As is evident from the photo, that guy is a demented pervert. IT'S A ROBOT, BRO -- HER ASS IS METAL. Some people, I swear. So anyway, like I was saying: I hid in a bathroom stall at the Museum of Natural History this weekend until it closed and then had my way in the Hall of Dinosaurs. Best weekend EVER.

Hit the jump for another picture and a video proving why this is the worst model ever.

Continue Reading " They're After Our Skinny Coke Whores!: Japanese Unveil Robotic Fashion Model "