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Results for "healthy"

  • August 2, 2011
    $9 Soylent Green crackers: not made with people, but with a made with people pricetag. That's a little questionable. But they are packed with spinach and "high energy plankton", so you can at least get your Popeye on knowing you're doing The Krusty Krab a service. Soylent Gr... / Continue →
  • September 1, 2010
    According to a recently completed 20-year study, moderate drinkers (1-3 drinks/day) live longer than heavy drinkers (4+ drinks/day), but even the heavy drinkers live longer than non-drinkers. Haha -- I knew it! See you at your own funeral, teetotalers! But why would abstai... / Continue →
  • August 16, 2010
    Note: I had to cut the graphic to make room for my bulging belly biceps, click HERE to see the whole thing. Just like the little fat boy said so eloquently, "bacon is good for me", and here's the informational graphic to prove it. So bac-on my rotund little friend, but rememb... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Thought KFC's Double Down sandwich was bad for you? Then think again. Because Friendly's just dropped the Grilled Cheese Burgermelt. What the hell's a Grilled Cheese Burgermelt? The sound of your heart trying to escape out your butthole. This is the BurgerMelt to end all ... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    This is a chart comparing Kentucky Fried Chicken's new Double Down sandwich to other fast food offerings. So looking at the top of the chart, a Panera Chipotle Chicken sandwich is the equivalent of eating 1.49 Double Downs. But a Wendy's Triple Baconator is the equivalent of ... / Continue →
  • March 31, 2010
    Soap, as you may well know, is an integral part of cleaning yourself unless you're European. And what better way to keep your gooch minty fresh than a giant D-20 soap on a rope? Plus no more prison shower sex! Kidding, kidding, still plenty of prison shower sex. Anyway, Ets... / Continue →
  • January 26, 2010
    Looks like the larger of the two just had a fairly significant meal as well. Just sayin', give it a couple hours and she'll only be a 246 pounder. Also, I highly don't recommend it but if you look hard enough I think you can make out their vaginas. So, yeah -- have fun with ... / Continue →
  • January 20, 2010
    New research suggests that sitting for extended periods may lead to future health risks. Wow, scientists, wow (what did you really do with all the grant money?). Research is preliminary, but several studies suggest people who spend most of their days sitting are more likely t... / Continue →
  • December 9, 2009
    Apparently "20 hard-boiled eggs wrapped in bacon and covered in sausage meat and breading, baked whole." Damn. If the internet really is a series of tubes (and I suspect it is) then this is just the thing to clog its arteries. Oh -- oh -- could it be? Am I really mastering ... / Continue →
  • November 23, 2009
    This is a fast food flowchart you can use to determine where to eat if you can't make up your mind and/or don't care about eating healthy. Larger version HERE. And speaking of larger versions -- there's gonna be one of you if you follow this flowchart everyday! Also, soda ha... / Continue →
  • November 12, 2009
    This is probably entirely fake and a giant hoax but I don't care because, well, breasts. Also -- don't question my journalistic integrity or I will swell your eyes shut so bad you'd be lucky to squint a nipple. According to German research published in New England Journal of ... / Continue →
  • October 30, 2009
    Germaphobe? Worried about the bovine flu (it's coming, you watch)? Tired of operating a keyboard when you're 99.98% sure The Superficial Writer was touching with himself while using it? Enter the $899 Vioguard self-sanitizing keyboard. The Vioguard keyboard is aimed at medi... / Continue →
  • July 17, 2009
    Inspired by the "Taco Town" Saturday Night Live skit I haven't seen, this Pizza Crepe Taco Pancake belongs in my belly. Go on, get in there -- the tequila wants company. The layers are a crunchy beef taco with nacho cheese, lettuce, tomato and a southwestern sauce; a soft flo... / Continue →
  • May 11, 2009
    This is the world's smallest (and cutest) combo meal. It consists of a little cheeseburger with all the fixins, a very small fry, and a miniscule soda. It's all real too. Hit the jump to see just how small it is (burger is about 1" round), along with a link to more pictures ... / Continue →
  • April 25, 2009
    This video is like two years old so if you've seen it, congratulations, free Geekologie bumper sticker. Just leave an 'OLD' and your bank account info in the comments and I'll have it transferred first thing Monday morning. Anyway, did you know that in an emergency situation ... / Continue →
  • April 21, 2009
    Remember Toby Jones of Jones' Big Ass Truck Rental & Storage? Well he's back with another genius business idea, this time in the form of Jones' Good Ass BBQ & Foot Massage. As you can see from the video, they even have fried dinosaur. Which, at least in my opinion, is just p... / Continue →