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SOLID PLAN: Two Teen Girls Drug Parents With Sleeping Pills So They Can Use The Internet After Curfew

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A 16-year old girl and her 15-year old BFF (and future cellmate) used prescription sleeping pills to lace the milkshakes of the 16-year old's parents so they would fall asleep and the girls could use the internet after their 10PM 'no internet use' curfew. Presumably to webcam topless.

The parents woke up in the middle of the night feeling "really groggy" with "hangover symptoms," [Lieutenant Lon] Milka said, but had not been drinking.


Investigators later learned the girls crushed prescription sleeping pills and put them in the milkshakes so the parents would fall asleep and they could use the Internet past the 10 p.m. curfew.

The parents didn't end up drinking all of the milkshakes because it was "kind of gritty" and "really funny tasting," Milka said.

Milka said it was unclear what websites the girls accessed while the parents were asleep.

"It's the first I've ever heard of it," he said. "Kids are crazy these days."

Kids aren't just crazy these days, lieutenant, they're LUNATIC INSANE. I really fear for the future of society. Full disclosure: but only until I die, then I don't care what happens because IT'S NOT MY PROBLEM ANYMORE. I'm gonna be way too busy trying to find a way to ninja my way over the top of the Pearly Gates.

Video news report after the jump.

Thanks to The Great and Powerful Evil Ares, who's so great and powerful and evil his parents don't even question him when he's perusing the 'Casual Encounters' section of Craigslist after his bedtime.

There are Comments.
  • waf

    This is what happens when society bans parental disciplinary actions, watering them down to "time outs" and begging. It's not video games, it's not modern media, it's not social connectivity... it's the lack of the switch (or rod, or belt) that has kids so out of control today. Exacerbated by the entitlement society pushed at school and in the media.

  • AaaronG

    You've got to grind them up into a powder, not just crush them. This isn't your pill-intolerant pet.

  • LittleBigFace

    Her name's Milka. Coincidence or Illuminati?

  • JimmyThr

    The shit kids have pulled these days, they are lucky the little shits didn't kill them so they could have an orgy in the house.

    and fuck all of this for making me sound like an old man

  • Jadis

    seems like extreame measures just for internet use. Was it really about curfew or was it about doing things they shouldn't be doing anyway on the internet.

  • ogga

    Does anyone else notice that this whole, " drugging the milkshakes with sleeping pills" concept, is right out of the movie Rat Race? John Lovitz character, tricks his family into drinking milkshakes filled with sleeping pills so he can load them into the car and drive to silver city New Mexico.

  • Rick_McRockock

    Every time I tried this with my parents I couldn't resist the tasty milkshake and ended up drugging myself. What can I say I love milkshakes....

  • Matty Spinny

    good work girls. next time don't get caught. back in the 80's-90's this was acceptable behavior. however it was more for getting out of the house and not using the internet. whats happening to the world?

  • Kevin

    LON MILKA GETS HIS MILK FROM LON LON RANCH OMG EPONA

  • n_a_a_s

    ninjaing over those pearly gates is the only way to get in GW, I'll be doing the same

  • Steven Sanchez

    "the girls could use the internet after their 10PM 'no internet use' curfew."

    WTF Hold on for a minute, 10PM!? wow I had a feeling this article lied, I think they meant to say "12 year olds"

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    I am certain it was correct. the 10:00 PM curfew was probably in place due to previous issues with the teen. Not hard to imagine the issues these parents had with the kid seeing how the bottom-feeder was willing to drug her parents to fuck around on the internet. Lock the little shit up and then she can show her boobs off to all kinds of freaks all the time.

  • The article went on to state that this whole case left Lieutenant Milka shaken.

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