Seen here looking way less emoticon-y than he was in his Facebook post, 18-year old dummy Jacob Cox-Brown poses for his booking photo after being arrested following admitting to a drunken hit-and-run on his Facebook page. Drivin drunk: not so classic now is it, Jacob?
At 1 a.m. Wednesday, Riley responded to 1884 Fifth St. for a hit-and-run crash.
A white-colored Scion had been sideswiped, leaving significant damage to the car.
Later that day, Officer Riley received a private Facebook message from someone who wanted to report what Cox-Brown posted on Facebook - that he had been drinking, driving and involved in a hit-and-run.
They were also able to match pieces left behind at the scene of the crash to the vehicle registered to Cox-Brown.
Cox-Brown was arrested and lodged at the Clatsop County Jail. He was charged with two counts of failing to perform the duties of a driver.
Two counts of failing to perform the duties of a driver -- that's it? Can't we get some failing to perform at life charges thrown in there as well? I don't know, maybe some first degree dipshittery? Plus I vote he has to pay a yearly idiot moron tax and pick up all the trash in my yard (there's a lot).
Thanks to Pyrblaze and v, who agree if you're going to do something illegal, it's probably best not to post about it on social media. LOL, I'M SMOKING CRACK RIGHT NOW WITH THE MONEY I ROBBED FROM FIRST CITIZEN'S BANK. The one on Main Street. I robbed it on Saturday.