Excuse me miss, I think you forgot something. "Yes?" A scrunchie!
Wrangler, a brand best known for conjuring up images of tight-assed cowboys whenever you think of them, is releasing the world's first line of moisturizing jeans for ladies. Hey -- I like my legs to feel soft too, you know. Moisturizing isn't just for women. Fun fact: sometimes I like to sit in the dark and rub my legs pretending they're a lady's. One time I even got so into it that when I accidentally brushed against my crotch it freaked out for a second. I'VE BEEN HAD!
The Denim Spa jeans [£85, ~$135] come in three finishes - Aloe Vera, Olive Extract and Smooth Legs, which aims to prevent cellulite. Hydrating properties include of natural oils and butters, such as apricot kernel oil, passion fruit oil, rosehip oil, shea butter and monoi de Tahiti - a Polynesian ingredient made using Tiare flower buds soaked in refined coconut oil.
The effects of the ingredients last up to 15 days, but a reload spray will also available to buy - meaning that the formula lasts between 67 and 95 wears.
Alternatively, just squirt a bunch of lotion down the waist of your existing jeans like I just did. "GW? It's soaking through in the crotch and makes it look like you pissed yourself." Pissed myself, or saved $135? "Pissed yourself." It does, doesn't it? I'll go change.
Thanks to Rob, who told me urine also has moisturizing properties but I think he was just trying to get me to pee in the water the next time I take a bath (which I will).