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Yeah? Well I Huffed Axe Once: Edible Deodorant Candy

November 13, 2012 in candy, deodorant, eating things, for the ladies, i smell like ass and there's just no way around it, i tried using one of those natural deodorant crystals once before a job interview and i went in there sweating my balls off and smelling like a chili cheese dog with onions (i didn't get the job), perfume, smells, the future ladies and gentlemen (i'm joking the ancient romans probably did shit like this)

deodorant-candy.jpg

*snapping pictures* Perfect -- you're doing great. Now raise you arm to cover your boob a little. Awesome, now let me see those bright blue eyes and DAMMIT STOP EATING THE FLOWERS.

Deo Perfume Candy is a rose-flavored candy that's supposed to act as a deodorant. Specifically for ladies (think Secret, but edible) because the candy can allegedly make a 145-pound woman smell like perfume for up to six hours. What happens if a 190-pound man eats a whole bag? Stay tuned to find out!

Geraniol is a natural antioxidant and its fragrance, once consumed as a candy, leaves the body through its pores, creating a naturally sweet smell that can last for hours.

I guess Geraniol works the same way as alcohol because one time I was at work with a hangover and even though I'd showered that morning I started sweating and you could SMELL the wine coming out my pores. It was disgusting and I left at lunch that day.

Thanks to PYY, who told me rubbing Skittles under your pits does the same thing and now I'm sweating rainbows.

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There are Comments

  • It certainly passes the hype test!

  • Jonathan Slamko

    Better hope the people that try these are not allergic to insects, although geraniol can be a mosquito repellent ..its also produced from the glands of honey bees to mark flowers and the entrance to there bee hives....So I guess she will smell pretty sweet when SHE IS COVERED IN BEES.....

  • But I want to smell of sunlight.

  • One word: Cancer.

  • Turtle.
    Your go.

  • Shepherd Blue

    Xanax.

  • Lee Tan

    CTHULU!!!!!!

  • Sammich

  • I wonder who upvotes me whenever I say a number like that.

  • $18922249

    You got one from me, but if only to balance out the downs.

  • GW's writing style always cracks me up....

  • fourth

  • $18922249

    To down vote... or not to down vote... hmmmm.

  • Interesting approach on odor by masking it from the inside.
    oh well....candy is candy folks, even if it has some freaky science applied to it.
    As long as it doesn't cause zombification. ;)

  • $18922249

    I cant believe some of the shit that people get funded.

  • Well this isn't the worst one I've seen get funded.

  • Did anyone else imagine eating a stick of deodorant when reading this headline? Because that's what it kinda made the product sound like.

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