Pull String For Taytays: The Variable Cleavage Bra

You could have at least Photoshopped her face to look like different pictures you know.

Apparently Wonderbra's Variable Cleavage Bra was originally introduced in 2000 and this is just a limited time re-release, but I barely even knew what a tit was twelve years ago and now, well, they're easily in my top five. You know that song 'My Favorite Things' from The Sound of Music? Mine would be like dinosaurs, beer, video games, boobs and sleeping. Ooh -- and Cinnabon.

It has a cord between the two cups which, when pulled downwards, draws the two sides of the bra together and creates a push-up effect.

The design allows women to stick to a modest cleavage during the day, then create a more glamorous look in the evening.

Rachel Haddon, 24, a 34B model from West London said: 'There's a noticeable difference in my cleavage as soon as I pull it tighter.

'I could wear it all day, although I'd put it on the lowest setting for daytime. Then, when I go for drinks, I'd pull it tight to give my boobs a good boost.'

Call me a traditionalist, but I still like to mash my tits together the old fashioned way: with my hands. *mushing man-boobs together* Go on -- stick your head between these pillows and motorboat yourself to Fantasy Island. "Jesus, you smell like B.O." Just try to ignore it, I'm gonna pick up some deodorant after work.

Thanks to Ali, who caught me duct-taping my man-boobs down in the parking lot before coming into work with the hopes my coworkers will stop calling me Chesty McButtsex (long story).

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