Seen here serenading gravel, a water-boatman celebrates being the world's loudest animal (NOT largest testicled) in relation to body size. How do they do it? The same way you would if you could -- strumming their wieners. *performs Dueling Banjos with a bro*
Scientists from France and Scotland recorded the aquatic animal "singing" at up to 99.2 decibels, the equivalent of listening to a loud orchestra play while sitting in the front row.
Micronecta scholtzi are freshwater insects measuring just 2mm that are common across Europe.
The insect makes the sound by rubbing its penis against its abdomen in a process known as "stridulation".
Stridulation -- that's, uh, that's not what we call it. Playing the five-finger vagina, yes. Now, not to brag or anything -- and I've never actually set up mics, but my roommate's pretty loud when he rubs his wiener. Hold on, I'll put my laptop up to his door.
Told you so! Also, I room with Michelangelo.
Thanks to Rev Dr Dom, who took this opportunity to point out his can sing AND dance. Nice -- we're just a flea-circus away from a traveling show!