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May 1, 2011 - May 7, 2011 Archives

  • May 7, 2011
    You know what the problem with current smartphones are? They're not easy enough to lose. Enter the PaperPhone, a paper-thin smartphone capable of doing everything your current phone can except have a color screen/take high-res photos/not accidentally get thrown away like a ha... / Continue →
  • May 7, 2011
    ♫ The best part of waking up is a f***in' demon in your cup ♫ Admittedly, the barista responsible clearly has some froth-art skills. Unfortunately, he also had to sell his soul to the devil for them and is limited to drawing pentagrams, demons and penises in people's coff... / Continue →
  • May 7, 2011
    Forget cat ears, I wanna know more about that hunk on the poster! This is a pair of mind-controlled cat ears designed by Neurowear. Basically, when you're not concentrating (which is always for me), they lay down. When you focus, they perk up. If you try wrapping your head ... / Continue →
  • May 6, 2011
    Hey guys sorry for the slow posting today, something's come up (NOT my period) and I have to run out for awhile. Hopefully I'll be back to post this afternoon, but if not I'll make it up to you this weekend with some Saturday and Sunday posts. "Plus a goodie bag?" NO -- THIS... / Continue →
  • May 6, 2011
    These are some cute assed (LITERALLY!) Hello Kitty pants etsy user Mazter knit for her daughter. Only catch is, she isn't selling the pants themselves, just the pattern. So you'll just have to order the pattern and then ask your mom to PICK UP THOSE NEEDLES AND GET CRACKIN CAUS... / Continue →
  • May 6, 2011
    You know me: I like dino pr0n, eating all the marshmallows out of my roommate's Lucky Charms (f*** you Derek!), and writing my name using the ink of my own urine. Enter the Thermochromic Urinal, which is exactly what it sounds like. Basically like a mood ring (currently mine'... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    So you know how a SEAL team raided Bin Laden's hideout and killed him? I know, I just heard about it too. Also, that there was a specially trained dog on the raid team. Yes, seriously. Anyway, I would have taken him alive. Crippled as a one-legged spider, but alive. But e... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword drops later this year and I'll be dragging my Wii out of the back of my closet to play it. Theeeeeeen I'll probably sell it on eBay after signing it 'Miyamoto' in Sharpie because I'm a dirty swindler. Anyway, this is some of composer Koji Ko... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    This is a Throwbot. Throwbots can be thrown (just like the name implies!!!!!11) or shot out of a cannon, then roll around recording video so you finally put to rest how your roommate keeps his privates trimmed (I'm on to you!). This particular model features magnetic wheels a... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    When you hire Marcus Nispel, the director of the reboots of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Friday the 13th, to remake something, you shouldn't be too surprised when the result is a dimly-lit recreation that neither does justice to the original nor particularly offends it. He is th... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    Chess, a game best known for ending with me sweeping all the pieces off the board and threatening to stab my opponent, is played worldwide. Including while at war in Afghanistan. But what do you do if you're stationed there and don't have a set? "Make one out of dead spiders... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    I know a guy that'd give you $1 to sniff that pit. This is a parody of that annoyingly get stuck in your head song 'Like a G6'. Except this one's all about D&D and not a twin-engine business aircraft. As you can see from the screenshots, there's a chick involved so all dudes... / Continue →
  • May 5, 2011
    The Crovel is like the Swiss Army Kite of shovels. "Knife -- not kite, numbnuts." Yeah, whatever. It packs 13 different tools into a single unit (reminds me of my last kegger!). "What tools" you ask? LEMME TELL YA: Shovel Crowbar Pryer/Nail Remover (hey that's just pa... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Wicked Lasers, a company best known for selling me the laser I accidentally blinded my little brother with (sorry Geordi!), just released the first in a new series of 'Sith' double-ended dildos laser light sticks in honor of Star Wars Day. The $600 pew-stick packs 1W of power ... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    This is a seemingly magical chair created by Peter Bristol appropriately titled the 'Cut Chair'. At first glance your head might explode as to how it stands but, SPOILER: on one leg -- not unlike performing the flamingo on a lova. The only one that's actually a full leg is at... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Warner's last minute thought that mayyyyybe they should start promoting next month's Green Lantern release, instead of just discreetly slipping it out there and seeing how it goes, has already resulted in one new, CGI-filled trailer. Now there's another that shows off even more... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Note: Video after the jump possibly NSFW on account of some naughty words for private parts. This is Pokemon the musical. If you really love Pokemon and can't catch(!!!!!!11) enough of the franchise, you might like it. But if you think Yu-Gi-Oh is the shit and Pokemons are j... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    'Cause you can get anything you want at Alice's Restaur-- no? Wrong Alice? Woopsie doopsie. This is a shot from 'Alice of Magic World', an Alice in Wonderland themed restaurant in Tokyo they should have just named 'Alice in Wonderland' because I'm pretty sure the copyright i... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Not mine -- mine are hypnotizing. This is a video of one of those swinging ball desk toys (aka Newton's Cradle) but with different length droopers (mine drag on the floor), creating all sorts of crazy-ass designs. I just watched it twice back to back (the second time with my ... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    This is a tattoo of a t-rex with chainsaws for arms. You can tell they're actually attached and he's not just holding them BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL A T-REX COULD EVER HOLD CHAINSAWS. Grudges, yes. And as sexy a beast as he is, you know what my favorite part is? Trying... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Today, May the 4th, is Star Wars Day. Why? Because of the popularity of the pun, "may the fourth be with you." Embarrassing as shit, I know. Kidding, I'm just jealous I didn't come up with it. Or did I? *firing up time machine* "Go back and kill Jar Jar while you're at i... / Continue →
  • May 4, 2011
    Wimpole Home Farm (wimpole's have homes?!), a national trust farm in Britain, will allow up to 10,000 online farmers vote to make key decisions in the operations of the farm (whether to grow weed, kill Wilbur, etc.) for a £30 annual fee. Everything's gonna die! Subscribers w... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    Somebody's old-ass grandma in San Diego is making a fortune selling $60 suicide kits online designed to enable a person to constantly inhale pure helium gas (not included) and die. Me? I plan on accidentally inhaling a mouthful of titties when I'm like 400 and choking to dea... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    Note: This is a super-scaled down version with all the info cut out, click HERE to see the whole thing and get your birthyear learn on. This is the Geek Zodiac as created by James Wright and Josh Eckert. I was born in 1981 so I'm an astronaut. Honestly, I was kind of hoping ... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    This is a video of what it might be like to play Super Mario in real life. It's pretty cheesy and looks like it may have been rendered as somebody's first school project in 3-D modeling. I GIVE IT A C. Just sayin', the scale is way off. Also, I don't remember any handguns i... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    The Prism 200c is a bookbag designed by James Bond's Q Cambridge Consultants that can see through walls. All you have to do is lean against a surface and, PRESTO -- you're loitering and somebody's probably calling the cops. Using ultra-wideband signals the device is able to s... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    Note: Full-res version HERE in case you're a giant pervert. These are two earth ladies dressed up as Leela and Bender from Futurama. Or is it Leela and Bender from Futurama moonlighting as two earth ladies? I have no clue, I just know Leela's eye is freaking me the f*** out.... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    Because vampires are so hot right now, two guys decided to create a line of perfume based on the four major human blood types (A, B, AB and O) to sell to 'Twilight' fans. Me? I BATHE IN THE BLOOD OF MY ENEMIES. Ooooooor with bath salts and aromatic candles. What?! I like t... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    Seen here trying to lure in a passenger with the promise of an HJ (despite having every intention of mangling a wiener), a robotic driver beckons a man into its death trap. Pretty scary, right? I'm glad there are still companies out there (okay, maybe only Dodge) that give en... / Continue →
  • May 3, 2011
    That's gonna feel great in your ass. Apparently tactical pants are a real thing. Personally, I think MacGyver would argue any pair of pants can be tactical with the right tools in your pockets, but what do I know? I'm just an ex-CIA operative a guy who cut a hole in a pair o... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    How about we just show each other our privates and call it a Skype? Seen here reaching previously unknown levels of sadness, a user demos Kajimoto Laboratory's Kiss Transmission Device. The devices were designed to simulate the kiss of a lover (or webcam stripper!) across the... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    WARNING: Video may contain spoilers I have no idea I'm grounded and can't play video games. You played through that new Portal game yet? I haven't, my therapist doesn't want me playing any games with guns. "But it's not even a real gun!" I know, that's what I keep telling h... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    Stussy, a company best known for producing the jeans I wore in high school (JNCO too!) apparently didn't go under after I went off to college and started wearing khakis. Khakis, ha -- I've never even owned a pair! Capris, absolutely. Anyway, the company has teamed up with Ma... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    I'm pretty sure that's an animal's penis. You know what the problem with touchscreens are? Nothing. Well, except when you want to use one in the bathtub but can't because your hands are all wet from playing submarine penis hunter or whatever. I sometimes use my touchphone ... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    This is a video of jumping Jello cubes shot at 6,200 frames-per-second. It's pretty soothing. Unfortunately, it's hard to imagine they're titties doing all that jiggling because 1. they're red see-thru 2. cherry flavored (the closest I've tasted is a buttery nipple) and 3. squ... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    That's right folks, I'm calling it. Sometime on or before May 30th. The world may end in 2012, but it all starts in 2011. BOOM, movie concept. Get that made by fall -- I want Shia Laboof attached. If you get up any morning for the next few weeks, you'll be treated to the s... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    You're never gonna fly if you don't spread your wings! Seen here mid-bellyflop, a beer thief prepares to shotgun two cases of Bud Light cans with his chest. HARDCORE, BRO! The incident happened around 6:37pm on Wednesday at the E-Z Food Store, located at 15 Acuff Road in... / Continue →
  • May 2, 2011
    Hit him in the eyes! This is the Rollin' Justin. He can catch two balls thrown near him at the same time. Say hi to all the readers, Justin. "beep boop bzzt DESTROY." Oh shit! ...the robot is able to position itself within two centimeters of where it needs to be in a time... / Continue →