Dec 9 2010Now That's How You Sell Refurb Ink Cartridges


Honesty IS the best policy.

As a guy who hides under his desk avoiding his real job and blogging all day, I've always been curious about the life of a product description writer. And thankfully, the writer of a UK-based refurbished ink cartridge retailer has finally provided some much needed insight. Apparently it's not as glamorous as one would expect. Shocking, I know. But I thought I'd still like to give it a go:

Remanufactured HP 300 - (CC640EE) Black

Remanufactured, just for you. Contains 8mL (NOT the Eminem movie) of the highest quality black-market squid ink laundered money can buy (we're actually a prostitution ring). Will print indefinitely without fading, streaking, or turning your fingers black. Can other ink cartridge refurbishers promise that? They could, but that'd make them dirty f***ing liars. One time I printed out nudie pictures of a celebrity with this ink and you'd swear her breasts were 3-D -- that's how good this shit is. Also great for huffing. You know what? I don't even want to sell it anymore -- I'm keeping it all for myself. If you add one to your cart and I'm high enough, I may send you a cartridge, but don't count on it. You CAN count on still being charged though. I'm serious, that's how badass this ink is -- it's worth taking a chance of not even getting to get.

*Printing important documents with this ink makes them legally binding, regardless of signatures.

**Printing 'LOST DOG' signs with this ink will retroactively make your dog not run away in the first place. Does NOT work for cats.

I dunno, I thought it was kinda fun.

Product Site (currently down due to traffic I think)
Ink Cartridge Description of the Day []

Thanks to Colin, who makes his own printer ink out of vegetable oil and herbs. WTF?! Do you even have electricity?

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Reader Comments


I would buy it just for that description alone

The man is a working class hero.

o i totally get it!

Louis of

for that being his job, hes really bad at writing

GW, you're hired!!!

I want to get drunk with this guy, then have sex with his wife after he passes out

I want to have sex with Shelbon after he passes out after having sex with this guys wife

Well, it's amazing enough how his writing skills landed him a job where he's required to write so much...

I just bought one based on that description. If it doesn't measure up? I'm complaining!!

Lol @ "This account has been suspended" on the product page xD

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..... *Sigh* Really?

Good for this man, its the small wins that make us free



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