See the little dent in the can? Yes, the one the red arrow's pointing to. It helps you open the beer without hurting your finger or chipping a nail. Plus, if you punch a key through it you can chug the beer faster. Yep, just another reason why Japan is better than us at pretty much everything except postponing the robot apocalypse. What do we have -- Miller Lite vortex bottles? What a bunch of non-functional shit! Besides, I don't want to create a make-believe vortex while I'm pouring a beer, I want to create lasting memories with good friends. Juuuust kidding! -- I drink alone and to forget.
Thanks to ultrapony, who's done nothing but complain about the lack of oats since I made him my new mount. Oh yeah? ANOTHER WORD AND YOU'RE GLUE, MISTER!