Sep 8 2010Eh, The Honor Roll Is Overrated: Bumper Stickers For Parents Of Gamer Children
You know those "I'm a Proud Parent of a Honor Roll Student at Nobodycares Middle School" bumper stickers? Yes, the ones that make you want to key the car they're on. Oh you have one? Well it works for you. Seriously, it really ties the back of the minivan together. The little stick-figure family portrait too (I'll be back to pour sugar in your gas tank).
My son Dean is going to be out of beta in just over 3 months and I've got some preparing to do. I've never understood why parent stick the crap bumper stickers about their six year olds making the honor list in a grade where bladder control is part of the curriculum. So I decided to make some stickers that I would be proud to brag about to the world. And since my child will grow up playing games that build character (and OCD) they would look like this
'Geekolgie Writer for President 2012' aside, stickers have no place on a car. *ahem* I'm looking at you, failed inspection sticker! Speaking of which -- anybody here in the automotive industry wanna give me a pass for a cool $20 under the table? Maybe roll my odometer back 40K while you're at it? Haha, what do you mean "that's illegal"? Your face should be!
Bumper Sticker [zero-lives]
Thanks to Matt, who only puts sparkly and/or smelly stickers on his car because he's classy and that is textbook classy if I've ever heard it.
Reader Comments
1. weiner - September 8, 2010 6:25 PM
furst fags
2. Soundwav3 - September 8, 2010 6:26 PM
@1 your parents must have one of these virgin stickers on their ride too.
3. kevin - September 8, 2010 6:28 PM
SCHOOL IS FOR NERDS!!!!! DROp out like aviana dalllaaaalllll!!!!!!!
4. Ocelot - September 8, 2010 6:38 PM
Dental Plan!
5. blueZorro - September 8, 2010 6:50 PM
Sometimes I'm Woodman, if ya know what I mean.
6. Dishy - September 8, 2010 7:01 PM
Bumper sticker: I'm the proud parent of a kid with a 14-inch penis. (He takes after his mother.)
7. snoop - September 8, 2010 7:03 PM
@6 Mom? is that you?
8. Frolicking amongst the War Machines - September 8, 2010 7:21 PM
These are freakin' awesome.
More, I demand more!
9. Kelehendros - September 8, 2010 7:31 PM
major sticker win!
10. Rj - September 8, 2010 8:12 PM
Is your son unborn? He isn't in beta you douche! quit misusing terms you don't understand in an effort to appear more geek.
11. RJ Hater - September 8, 2010 8:16 PM
RJ you nitwit! Read!!!!
12. elaine12qw - September 8, 2010 8:31 PM
S c o t t says, "Time and tide wait for no man." I think " F a t e and l ov e wait for no one!" So I recently joined a ice platfom *****BlackW hiteC upi d.c000 m ***** to find my tr-ue LO-VE....Im lucky!! It is destined that you can also m-e-et your lo-v-e.....GO and have a try.....
13. Rj - September 8, 2010 8:51 PM
okay, so you think his kid is in preschool? That could qualify as beta.
14. miya - September 8, 2010 10:26 PM
earn money by doing nothing! all you need to do is join blogwebmail !
* once register, get $1.00 dollar!
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15. TPS - September 8, 2010 11:07 PM
One I have seen more than a few times is a simple black one that says "My child fragged your honor student".
16. mcfeely smackup - September 9, 2010 12:44 AM
what does this have to do with Star Wars?
17. Wedge Antilles - September 9, 2010 2:40 AM
Want to an easy way to get free stuff?
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fill out some offers, get your points, and use the to buy your prizes!
that easy!
18. Leftover got feathers in his ass - September 9, 2010 7:32 AM
Your honor roll student wants to save the trees, tell him to wipe his butt with an owl.
19. Rob - September 9, 2010 8:45 AM
Yeah because kids today still play games from the 80's.....
More like 'My child beat Fallout 3 and owned those shitty bumper stickers'
20. moonbabydragonfly - September 9, 2010 8:56 AM
DUDE! I <3 these- seriously, I want these. Like, I want to go get one RIGHT NOW. My kid cut his gaming teeth on Zelda: Ocarina of Time when he was like....4? Now he can get through any game faster than me- and I've been a gamer my whole life. *runs off to hunt gamer stickers*
21. Melonie - September 9, 2010 10:11 AM
So where can I get me one of them "Geekologie Writer for President" stickers? I'd totally put that on my car. Right next to my roller derby stickers and Flying Spaghetti Monster.
22. matt - September 9, 2010 12:37 PM
Woodman? Really? Crashman without the airbuster, sure that I'd be proud of, but woodman's cake. I'd be disappointed if my kids couldn't do it on their first try!
23. MegaBlor - September 9, 2010 4:49 PM
My child (insert VIDEO-GAME accomplishment here).
@22
Leaf Dude was cake.
24. MisterDeal - September 9, 2010 8:40 PM
My friend has this sticker on his car
sanshee.com/stickers/Little-Sister-On-Board
25. angelo spagnolo - September 11, 2010 12:41 PM
If my kid couldn't beat Wood Man on the first try I would beat him.