July 4, 2010 - July 10, 2010 Archives
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This is a little video created by College Humor demonstrating what it would be like if classic video games all had a super-easy mode. Well -- what would it be like? Not fun. But you would leave the game feeling like a winner, which is key if you have low self esteem. Know w... / Continue →
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Remember Super Mario Crossover -- the Super Mario Bros you can play as different characters? Well like all great things, there's always some stuff that has to be cut out of the final product. Take the book I wrote for example: it's nothing but a dust jacket. But did that sto... / Continue →
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Apparently air traffic control at Xiaoshan Airport in China spotted a UFO on radar and was forced to divert flights until E.T. phoned the f*** home. Arcing over Zhejiang's provincial capital Hangzhou, the UFO appeared to glow with an eerie white light and left a bright trail i... / Continue →
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These are little homemade Hello Kitty pizza bites as baked by Flickr user LoveBones (I love them too -- especially the crushed and shattered ones of my enemies. MWHAHAHAHAHA!!). Any idea what the eyes and whiskers are made out of? Because I guessed mouse turds but that might... / Continue →
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This is a funny little video of Yoda doing his voice recording for the Star Wars series of TomTom GPS voices. I'm not even gonna lie: I giggled. Like a schoolgirl. Now you may be wondering, "but GW, how you gonna giggle like a schoolgirl if you don't have a plaid skirt and k... / Continue →
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I know that's not actually custard in the picture, but it IS instant pistachio pudding, which is not only delicious, but may or may not be stab-proof (you slather it on your chest -- I'll get a knife). British scientists have created a way to make bulletproof vests lighter a... / Continue →
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Great, now I want a Code Red. F***ing love that stuff. I'll even finish a bottle that's been rolling around in the backseat of my burning-hot car for fours days. You think I'm above that? I'm not above anything. This is the NSFW Workplace Safety Advisory System, it works j... / Continue →
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Jeff King and Chad Knight went and turned an iPad into a skateboard. But will it shred? You're gonna have to watch to find out! Or just keep reading. No, no it will not. Hit the jump for the video.... / Continue →
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This is a list somebody wrote allegedly explaining why geeks make superior lovers (which is 100% true). Some of the reasons I agree with, but most of it sounds like it was written by someone who's never seen a vagina before (is it true they look like baby crocodiles?!). 1. we... / Continue →
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We've all been there: you need to plug in the microwave to cook a Hot Pocket but you're in the bathtub getting all prune-y. What do you do? Go ahead and plug that shit in thanks to the $35 Wet Circuit water resistant power strip! (And toss a Kid Cuisine in for me while you'r... / Continue →
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Now I know what you're thinking, "PR2? I think I saw that in the theater -- I hate sequels". And that may be true, but I'm not referring to PR2 the fictitious movie sequel, I'm talkin' bout the beer-fetching robot, yo. Great idea, right? No. Don't come crying to me when yo... / Continue →
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You know what the problem with sandwiches is? They're too hard to transport. What they need to do is invent specially-sized bags to tote them around in. Oh they've got those? WHERE THE F*** HAVE I BEEN?! Anyway, if you're too lazy to make a sandwich or worry your canned Co... / Continue →
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This is a video of several Super Mario levels being played on a city sidewalk. Except they weren't actually played on the sidewalk, the video was motion-tracked and then the Mario levels were superimposed to appear as if they were played on the sidewalk. Which, I bet if you a... / Continue →
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When it comes to taking down perps, you don't always want to shoot them in the face and have their brains explode all over the wall. Wait -- you don't?! No, you don't. Sometimes you're gonna need to torture them first to gain vital information. Aaaaaah, right right right! ... / Continue →
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This is a video of the world's largest skateboard. How big is the world's largest skateboard? Bigger than a breadbox, smaller than the planet. That should give you a pretty good idea. Did I ever tell you I broke my arm trying to ollie over the recycling bin in my driveway? ... / Continue →
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DeviantARTist Anafuji went and made this Mario-themed chess cake for somebody's birthday. Or maybe a retirement party. Or just for fun. I don't actually know, but I felt guilty when I realized I might be lying to you. I want you to know I wouldn't do that because I really b... / Continue →
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This is a video of a stop-motion LEGO shootout. If I didn't know better, I'd swear it was pulled straight from a scene in a Hollywood blockbuster. And that I was on acid and my girlfriend's cat was telling me to kill the couple downstairs. DON'T YOU POUND ON THE CEILING WITH... / Continue →
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See this series of pictures? It's a deep sea squid. In the first picture it's just a normal-ass looking squid, right? Well in the second one its been dissected to see its johnson. It's the white tubular (but not in a gnarly, hang-ten kind of way) thing in the lower half of ... / Continue →
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Painter/stop-motion animator Blu (who did THIS amazing work featured awhile ago) is back at it with 'BIG BANG BIG BOOM', a 10-minute "moving" painting showing the evolution of the earth, from big bang to eventual nuclear destruction. Did I mention there were several minutes of... / Continue →
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Between the oil spills and hoversharks, I propose we go ahead fill the oceans with concrete. Not only will we never have to worry about tsunamis, but -- OMG, I JUST SOLVED THE OVERCROWDING PROBLEM! There, uh, was a population overcrowding problem, right? Who cares, I'm walki... / Continue →
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This is a giant cookie decorated to look like the Deathstar. Want to bake your own? Cool, here's what you do: 1) Make a big-ass ball of cookie dough and put it in the oven. 2) Poke it with a toothpick and lightly press it with a knife halfway through baking. 3) Pull it out of... / Continue →
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This video has been out for awhile and I saw it before it was even recorded, but it's making it's way around the internet again and I'm afraid I won't stop getting the tip unless I post it (ha, like that'll stop you!), so here it is for those of you who haven't seen it. It's a... / Continue →
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According to a recent report, Neanderthals had giant, Popeye-like right arms, possibly due in part to an all-meat diet. I call the heart! Remains of an early Neanderthal with a super strong arm suggest that Neanderthal fellows were heavily pumped up on male hormones, possessi... / Continue →
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I'm not even gonna lie: I've never made love on an airplane. Something about trying to get it on in the tiny bathroom an overweight businessman just spent twenty minutes vacating the fast food from his bowels in makes my penis want to shrivel up and hide in an overhead bin. B... / Continue →
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If there's one thing Zack loves, it's not paying for internet. If there's two, it's not paying for internet, and using said pirated webs to download videos of pr0n actress Amy Reid and leave them where they can be discovered by the ladies he's stealing his tubes from in the fi... / Continue →
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Steve Buscemi, best known for reminding everyone of the creepy uncle they don't feel comfortable being left alone with, is one interesting looking fellow. And by interesting I mean not attractive. If he were a children's story he would be 'The Ugly Duckling'. But instead of ... / Continue →
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Note: Video is after the jump because you can't not shit your pants. This is a video of what is allegedly the world's most realistic looking human face mask. It was made by the folks at SPFXMasks and is illegal for felons to purchase. Okay, I made that up. What I didn't mak... / Continue →
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Magnetic Thinking Putty is exactly what it sounds like if you replace 'Thinking' With 'Silly': $14 magnetic silly putty. BUT CAN IT STILL COPY THE FUNNIES?! Magnetic Thinking Putty takes regular "silly" putty and turns its awesomeness up to 11. Like any other putty, it can be... / Continue →
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Prince, best known for looking like a pretty lady with a skeezy mustache who tried changing his name to a symbol, claims the internet is beat and it's time to move on. Well damn, way to Purple Rain on my online parade! Unlike most other rock stars, he has banned YouTube and i... / Continue →
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To make up for that whole Back to the Future hoax, here's some hope that maybe by 2015 we actually will have all the stuff they did in the movie. Starting with: POWER WHEELS LACES! Plus they only require a giant proton pack strapped to the back to work! Technology! Inspired... / Continue →
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You'd think a company selling a $20K diamond-encrusted iPhone would be able to come up with a better looking picture. But what do I know? I'm just a man with limited Photoshop skills who's selling Bedazzled iPhones to stupid rich people. These phones are the shit, that's wha... / Continue →
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Due to a crappy Photoshop job of the DeLorean's time circuits (above), there's an internet rumor going around that in Back to the Future II Marty travels into the future to July 5th, 2010 (yesterday). WELL IT ISN'T TRUE. In reality, Marty travels to October 21, 2015. Which i... / Continue →
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Ever wonder what it would be like to be a turtle? Chug a canister of ooze wearing a ninja turtle costume. Trust me, I know how these things work. Oooor watch this video from the the TortuCam! WTF's a TortuCam? A waterproof camera strapped to the back of a turtle, dummy! G... / Continue →
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In honor of celebrating America's independence yesterday and my being released from jail without having to spend the entire night (4 AM), here's a pizza made the American way. What's the American way? Try two McDonalds cheeseburgers, an order of nuggets and a box of fries, al... / Continue →
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This is a 3:30 war movie made entirely with cardboard weaponry. It's incredibly well made though. Granted not as good as Saving Private Ryan or Band of Brothers, but if you expected it to be you obviously have zero grasp on reality. This video took about a month and a half o... / Continue →
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In news that shouldn't surprise anyone who's fallen head-over-heels for a twinkly-ass vampire only to find out that, not only is he pretending his hardest not to be gay, but he's gonna end up marrying a two-timing, wolf-loving floozy, watching Twilight Eclipse has claimed a man... / Continue →
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Readers, I though I'd take a second out of my busy schedule laying in bed to wish you all a happy and safe fourth of July. So get out there and grill something or whatever the hell people do to celebrate. And before you goobers begin the America trolling, remember: some coun... / Continue →

