Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial

June 20, 2010 - June 26, 2010 Archives

  • June 26, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I already had like six fanboys call me crying last night after the iPhone sniping. It was pathetic. Seen here looking remarkably like John Gosselin taking a pounding to the mangina (and loving it), Tom from Blendtec is back to wreck an iP... / Continue →
  • June 26, 2010
    Ever wanted a flip-flop that looks like a sandwich? Who hasn't?! I dream about that shit at night. And now you can thanks to this Briskit Flip Flop from Etsy seller SoleSensations. Plus it's only $295! For one! Perfect for that person in your life with a foot AND food fet... / Continue →
  • June 26, 2010
    With World Cup fever in full swing what better way to celebrate than jamming a vuvuzela up somebody's ass playing a little bathroom soccer? Enter the Klokicker, the urine-based sport that's sure to have you staring at another man's wiener. Football mania while urinating ! I... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because fanboys are already crying and this is only a picture. This is a video of the new iPhone 4 getting shot by a Navy Seabee with a 50-caliber sniper rifle. It's pretty cool to watch, even if dude does barely clip the thing. Now I'm not sayi... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    This ambigrammatic (FAKE WORD IS FAKE) tattoo reads 'art & science' when read in one direction, 'philosophy' when read in another and 'schools 4 fools' when read upside-down in a mirror while spinning around repeating 'Bloody Mary'. "Art & Science / Philosophy" -- designed by ... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    The latest in zombie apocalypse pie-charts, this one shows what you'll most likely be doing in the event of a zombie apocalypse. Not to brag or anything, but I'll almost certainly be in the little green pie-piece. Ooooor masturbating in my closet until I'm eaten. Things That... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I don't want you kids getting any ideas (yes, yes I do too -- you should try it with the tailgate down). This is a video of somebody's grandpa passed out in a La-Z-Boy in the back of a speeding truck. Actually, he might be dead. But if... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Finally, you can start that pr0n site you've always wanted and slap on a .xxx domain designation (i.e. http://www.dinoassbiting.xxx). I just pre-registered like 40 sites! (38 dino, two robot-torture fetish). The board of net overseer Icann [Internet Corporation for Assigned... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Wow, your editor is almost as good as mine (I don't have one is the thing). But seriously, I think we can all agree the future of newspapers is there aren't gonna be any. world's most futuristic newspaper [technabob] Thanks to Sally, who only uses newsprint for arson.... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Finally, the moment you've all forgotten about been waiting for: the winners of last week's Buckyball giveaway! I promised I'd give a set to the first person with a non-first related comment, and used a random integer generator to select from the more than 6,600 entries for th... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    Oscar the grouch kitty was sleeping in a field when his back legs got run over by a combine harvester. That story smelling fishy as shit aside, now he has bionic legs. His new kitten heels were designed with custom-made implants, which "peg" the ankle to the foot and mimic th... / Continue →
  • June 25, 2010
    EMILY may look like a porpoise wearing a Red Cross tent, but she's actually a robo-lifeguard. One that will undoubtedly turn a blind, robotic eye if you ever cramp up in the surf. This summer, EMILY (for EMergency Integrated Lifesaving lanYard) began patrolling Malibu's dange... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Because geeks like arguing about things to show off their intellectual superiority (think nerdy peacocks), here's a visual guide to lightsabers so you can prove you're right when arguing with a fellow Star Warser at the bar over a cold Mountain Dew. That's cool and all, but yo... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Comedy Central, best known for not giving me my own show despite asking nicely then threatening to blow up their satellite, will start airing BRAND SPANKIN' NEW (the best kind) episodes (with a 1-hour premier!) of Futurama tonight at 10PM/9 central. So yeah, tune in if you're ... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Note: This picture is small and I had to crop it click HERE to see the sadness in depressing high-resolution. This is a shot of a wave crashing in Orange Beach, Alabama. As you can see, it looks like absolute crap, which really got me thinking: there's probably a lot of whale... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Did you know Bosch makes more than just spark plugs? Me neither. But apparently they also make refrigerators and created this clever dinosaur meat marketing campaign to showcase how their VitaFresh appliances can keep foods fresher, longer. Thanks but no thanks, Bosch, I onl... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Do you like wine? I think wine is fine. As hell. I like pinot noir. Also, anything else with alcohol in it (except liver). And now you can buy wine by the disposable glassful! Hey -- lemme get a lil sippy-sippy. the inventor of this disposable stemware actually took it o... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I'm a firm believer in never-nudity. This is a video of a fit looking mom playing the Rock Band drums butt-ass naked in front of her children. Now I'm not saying I'm gonna befriend these kids so I can come over and join the band, but th... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Most people paint with paint. Me? I paint with the blood of my slain enemies. But San Francisco artist Chris Trueman painted this picture of his younger brother with the bodies of 200,000 dead ants. You sick bastard. "I found a guy who raises ants and sells them as horned... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Greg Peltz, best known for being the soldier half of this Team Fortress II cosplay team, has gone and created a small series of Victorian looking Star Wars portraits. This is Chewy here but there's Boba, C-3PO and a Vader after the jump. Except the Vader is a little more Civi... / Continue →
  • June 24, 2010
    Want to know how tall you are compared to a particular celebrity? Look them up on IMDB. Alternatively, get a 'Who Tall Are You' mirror. It's a mirror with famous peoples' names printed at their respective heights. I'm 1.5 Danny Devitos! Kidding, that would make me a m7.5' ... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Robots, uncaring how they destroy humanity just as long as they do, have resorted to sabotage in an attempt to pollute the world's oceans and kill off all our mermaids. Not Ariel! Earlier this morning, an undersea robot accidentally bumped into a venting system, which forced ... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I swore for a second it was an alien hatching so I beat my monitor with a beer bottle. Now I'm on my roommate's computer. Remember the giant spider crabs of Japan? Well this is a video of one molting. For those of you that don't know wh... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    This is Tōru Iwatani. He invented Pac-Man 30 years ago and still carries around his original "top secret" sketches of the game in a notebook. Me? I invented cool 28 years ago and still push my balls around in a wheelbarrow. Iwatani was a speaker at the recent Festival of G... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Some uber-Batman fan went and pimped out his golf cart Tumbler style. Good lookin'. Now I've never been good at golf because I have absolutely zero hand-eye coordination (one time I masturbated my leg for a half-hour), but I have gotten drunk and driven my cart into a water h... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    This is a cake somebody made to look like a Zerg Hive from Starcraft. It's most impressive and I would eat the whole thing AND smoke those crystals afterwards. Then, after staying up three days straight I'll eventually have a run-in with the po-po that leads to an inevitable ... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    This is a picture of somebody's (possibly a female's) hand they decided to desecrate to high hell with some robotic sacrilege. I just hope it's henna and not permanent because not only would I not shake your hand, I'D CUT IT OFF WITH A LIGHTSABER. Don't believe me? Ask Luke ... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Note: This picture is small and doesn't do the thing justice click HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE to see some nice, high-res pics. Remember the Millennium Falcon play-fort built as part of a Make-A-Wish wish granting for little leukemia-stricken Christian Bentley? Well it wa... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I already soiled the front page enough for the both of us. This is a video of 20 creepy-ass little robots all dancing in sync. And I mean in sync as in they all do the same thing at the same time, not 'NSync the talented boy band with all... / Continue →
  • June 23, 2010
    Note: This version is small and unreadable so click HERE or you're gonna die in world 8-1. These are the button-by-button instructions on how to beat Super Mario 3 in 11-minutes. I assume they work but I wouldn't know because I can't read and play video games at the same time... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Stand-up toothbrushes are toothbrushes with an integrated Weeble Wobble (read: weighted base) at one end so they always stand up and don't collect shit particulate laying on the bathroom sink (oh it's there -- you can't see it but it's there). Take one look at this brilliant d... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because Ke$ha sucks at music. Somebody (Youtube user MissSheenie) went and searched through original Star Trek footage to sync to Ke$ha's crappy hit 'TiK ToK'. This is the resulting music video. Admittedly, MissSheenie did a great job, but I can... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Thought KFC's Double Down sandwich was bad for you? Then think again. Because Friendly's just dropped the Grilled Cheese Burgermelt. What the hell's a Grilled Cheese Burgermelt? The sound of your heart trying to escape out your butthole. This is the BurgerMelt to end all ... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    So apparently Apple updated their terms of service and privacy policy (which you have to accept to continue downloading apps) yesterday to track your devices wherever you take them and use the information as they please. I probably should have taken a look before agreeing, but... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    And to think NASA blew $12M on every space suit when they could have been using $4 neon ponchos. You oughta be ashamed, NASA! Also, for not making me an honorary astronaut after going to Space Camp. Twice. What?! I rode the human gyroscope without puking!* *The first time.... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I can't have any of you that are lactose intolerant getting sick from your butt on the front page. This is Geekologie Reader Matt's stop-motion animation made using nothing but milk bottle tops (pogs, bitches!). It features a couple short... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Why anybody (except this person) would pay $33 for a 3-liter can of Hello Kitty motor oil is beyond me. Actually, why Hello Kitty motor oil exists in the first place is beyond me. I mean, Hello Kitty fanatics that change their own oil? There can't be more than two one of t... / Continue →
  • June 22, 2010
    Note: This is is small version of the picture, click HERE to see the thing in all its high-res glory and then make it your desktop background. Or don't. Stick to your nasty bikini chicks, I don't care. This is 'The Creation of Mario' featuring Shigeru Miyamoto giving life to... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    If I'm in the hospital the last thing I wanna see is a bunch of robots running around. I'd probably assume I've died and gone to hell. AND I AIN'T GOIN' OUT LIKE THAT. A hospital in Scotland is to become the first in the UK to use a fleet of robots to carry out day-to-day ta... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I just took a reading and there are unsafe levels of cuteness for the front page. This is a 1:12 video of a kitten catching a free ride on a turtle while the theme from Diddy Kong Racing plays. It's cute. Well, provided you don't think t... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Pepper Mouth is a little USB peripheral that monitors your typing and releasing a stinky-ass spray if you type dirty words. *poof* WHAT -- because I typed stinky-ass? *poof* Mmmm -- I love a good stink. This first version blasts its obnoxious peppery smell whenever it detec... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Oh yeah? Well I think YOU'RE the one that needs to Google it. Here, I'll even type it out for you: "laser tattoo removal". Good Thing "Look it Up on This Encarta CD ROM" Doesn't Fit on My Knuckles [ugliesttattoos] via Funny But Dumb: "Google It" Knuckle Tat [albotas] Than... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    LEGO is releasing a 2,504 piece Star Wars Imperial Shuttle this September for $260. For reference, that's four days' pay for me (plus two after-hour HJ's). This beast is bigger than my old model, at 28 inches tall (71 centimeters) and 22 inches wide (57 centimeters) when th... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because that amateur sketch doesn't have shit on the Alabama leprechaun. North Carolina native and self-proclaimed 'mountain man' (and possible moonshiner) Tim Peeler spotted a ten-foot tall Sasquatch trying to eat his dogs one night. Per Tim him... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Geekologie Reader Brandon of Little Mountain Productions recently helped build this Millennium Falcon play-fort topper for 9-year old Christian as part of a Make-A-Wish Foundation wish-granting. Good lookin', guys. Per Brandon: We are delivering this to 9 year old Christian ... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because these beats are far too fresh for the front page. I've been known to beat the occasional box before but only because I used to work for Fed-Ex and I was contractually obligated. This guy does it for fun. Admittedly, he does do an amazing... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    The GAEMS (learn how to spell, God!) suitcase doesn't carry travel-size toothpaste or soiled underwear -- oh no -- it carries a gaming console. A change of clothes? Where we're going we don't need a change of clothes. Enter the GAEMS Portable Console Gaming and Entertainment... / Continue →
  • June 20, 2010
    I swear, I don't know how you guys do it -- I can't even take care of myself. Just sayin', I almost burnt my entire apartment complex to the ground trying to boil hotdogs for lunch. What does that say about my potential parenting skills? Sharp as a tack, that's what. Kids l... / Continue →