Remember the Shake Weight, the only piece of exercise equipment than can guarantee you'll be able to milk a bull 4x faster with only six minutes of use a day? Well originally it was only targeted at the womens. But not any more -- now there's a men's model! I ordered two last week, one for each hand, and admittedly: I can already feel the difference. Mostly because I tore my penis off.
Hit it for the commercial but, WARNING: It's gonna make you hotter than a volcano.
Thanks to Sean, who shake-weighted his way to Olympic bronze in the clean and jerk. Wocka wocka wocka!