Feb 8 2010Mechanical Bull: Red Bull's Conceptual Bike
This is a conceptual Red Bull motorcycle as designed by Barrend Massow Hemmes. Riding it makes you look like you're boning a giant red bull from behind, which, I suspect, is the reason the internal combustion engine was invented in the first place. Is there anything sexier? Yes, but it involves mermaids and a wet t-shirt contest and....God, I got the shivers just typing that. And by "shivers" I mean "garden hose from the garage". Tell your sisters, Ariel. Cash prizes.
Hit the jump for two more pictures, including the original sketch.
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Reader Comments
1. Jedi - February 8, 2010 12:48 PM
WANT
2. Chuey The Rock N Roll Midget - February 8, 2010 12:54 PM
Can you imagine what you look like riding this?? You'll be driving down the freeway...looking like you are dry humping a bull...in the butt!!
3. mobedda - February 8, 2010 1:01 PM
This looks horny and angry
4. LSDiesel - February 8, 2010 1:02 PM
@2, I think that's what sold it for me.
5. STOMPY - February 8, 2010 1:02 PM
we'll make a trex version for you GW....
6. Barney Stinson - February 8, 2010 1:03 PM
That´s really not cool.
@2 Agree!!!
I guess bouncing a bull wasn´t the designers idea.....
7. black jesus - February 8, 2010 1:04 PM
im always horny and angry, so - good fit
8. Asperflux - February 8, 2010 1:17 PM
Long live the robots.
9. Christina - February 8, 2010 1:21 PM
@2 Why do you think the bull looks so darned angry??? lol
10. your mom is my whore - February 8, 2010 1:21 PM
@2 TRUE
but i would hump the shit out of it with a smile
11. your mom is my whore - February 8, 2010 1:22 PM
maybe if they pulled the horns back and made it a low rider
how about that idea??
12. Ed - February 8, 2010 1:23 PM
Cool, I want! :3
13. gforsi - February 8, 2010 1:28 PM
They hopefully build the exhaust pipe into the bull's nose.
Think about it.. hitting the gas pedal and flames shoot out of the nose.
EVIL Deluxe²
14. glace neuf - February 8, 2010 1:41 PM
i'd hit (ride) it
15. GiNa - February 8, 2010 1:54 PM
If poeple were always trying to stab pointy stick things for fun into yur back yu'd be angry also. Stupid matadors id like to stab you a couple of time rite in the balls just for fun.
16. jimmydogballz - February 8, 2010 1:54 PM
where are the wings?
17. GiNa - February 8, 2010 1:55 PM
Also, i laughed cause i imagined Ariel n her sisters @ Atlantis spring break in a wet t-shirt contest ha!
18. the black penny - February 8, 2010 1:57 PM
be great working for this site,,getting pad to be rude,,,wow...nice.
and what does a mermaid wet tshirt contest have to do with red bull?...
and he is as broke as anything,,using his garage water hose too....
...and even odder...i dont think he is even on drugs ...
great work
19. r k - February 8, 2010 2:00 PM
i totally agree, while this bike looks cool in the photo, riding it would make you look like you were giving the bull some butt lovin'. --no matter how tough you look, you could not possibly pull off looking cool while riding this.
20. Steal This Webcomic - February 8, 2010 2:03 PM
Dude, King Triton is going to cut off your b*lls for writing that.
21. Pat - February 8, 2010 2:40 PM
This is the best they could come up with? They should have contracted the project out to West Coast Choppers.
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Visit my site to read my newly published story, "Ragnarok."
22. Whatever @ Pat: That's Pat!!! - February 8, 2010 3:52 PM
Screw that Pat, let's see what you come up with? Hmmm. On all the shows of custom Choppers that I've seen, they start looking alike pretty quick- fancy pipework, interchangeable tweaks to the various parts of the bike; past a certain artistic flair they start to look a lil "cookie" cutter besides all their "badassery".
And all you freaks that wanna dry-hump a red bull, start with the can first. ;-P
@ 16: You get your wings when you wipe out on that monster!
Hey, it might be funny if the guy riding this was the Angry Chicken from Family Guy.
23. Milkman - February 8, 2010 4:32 PM
pretty neat but it has a feces dildo stickin out of its arse
24. i saw your mom naked - February 8, 2010 9:44 PM
i would def ride this just for the odd looks ide get from PETA members!
25. Graf Zeppelin - February 9, 2010 1:21 AM
is that a combustion engine between your legs or are you just generally happy to run me over with your burning rubber while straddling a giant red bull?
26. atheistgirl - February 9, 2010 7:57 AM
More dangerous than a normal mechanical bull.
27. Jaded Icon - February 9, 2010 9:25 AM
Looks like the bull from "The last of the Unicorns" movie.......was I not to know about that?.....
28. Wendy - February 9, 2010 2:34 PM
lol I looked at it and said to myself..."damn that looks cool" and then I read the comments, scrolled back up and looked at it again. *crinkles nose* I agree, creepy and gross.
29. MT - February 10, 2010 10:14 AM
I'd just put in my big loft living room for decor... if I only had one (a loft living room, of course).
30. Tyler - February 10, 2010 10:56 AM
Wow nice, looks sweet
31. Willie Dixon - February 10, 2010 11:58 AM
This is EXACTLY how you look riding this thing:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzg0rcMvypM
They actually had to turn off the comments from this video because everybody kept saying "why are you boffing that cat?" and claiming to report the guy to PETA.
32. John - February 12, 2010 8:05 PM
Why doesn't it have wings?