Feb 17 2010For The Ladies: Twilight Character Dummies
Tired of clutching a dog-eared copy of New Moon to your bosom to fall asleep at night? Well fear not, pathetic, because now you can buy $35 homemade Twilight character "manllows".
For all the twilight [sic] crazed lonely women in the world, Jacob Black is finally here to be with you and only you. Sleep with him, cuddle with him, use him as a neck rest, the Jacob Manllow is there to be your man and pillow all in one. Don't worry, in the Manllow world, all men are of age.
No. No no no no no. "Twilight dummy" jokes aside, you've got to admit these have nothing on my Legolas manllow. Isn't that right, my sexy little archer? You shot me right through the heart.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots of the travesty.
Worst Idea Ever: Twilight-Themed "Manllows" (Half Man/Half Pillow) [slashfilm]
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Reader Comments
1. Isaac - February 17, 2010 1:04 PM
This is a vast improvement on their regular appearance.
2. Richard McBeef - February 17, 2010 1:11 PM
I bet you can't keep them off of each other.
3. Intrepidpursuit - February 17, 2010 1:12 PM
@Issac I agree.
4. Dishy D - February 17, 2010 1:16 PM
I sleep with a XXX-large Yaddle pillow. Pull the string for pillow talk.
My Smurfette pillow was jealous at first, but now she's really into it.
5. your mom is my whore - February 17, 2010 1:18 PM
OMG NO!!!
6. Hunternight - February 17, 2010 1:19 PM
pu
7. PepperMonster - February 17, 2010 1:19 PM
dang! i want me one of dem Edwards. XD
no, seriously. I have a married guy friend who loves twilight, and this would 've the perfect gift for him. haha!
have I mentioned yet that these are creepy as f_ck?
just what Twihards need, more evidence that we are nucking insane and should be sterilized. yay!
I'll take two.
8. JJDeal - February 17, 2010 1:26 PM
more proof that GW is a twihard :/
something more interesting please! like Zeldallows!
also, now on sale, Zeldallows!! $50
what do you mean it's just a blow up doll in a dress?
9. LSDiesel - February 17, 2010 1:28 PM
Hahahahah, Twilight Dummies. I get it!
10. Closet Nerd - February 17, 2010 1:36 PM
@4 That is a hot smurffette!!!! I'd LOVE to get a smurf job from her.... just sayin
11. Mr. Stranger - February 17, 2010 1:38 PM
I wonder how many of these will be "modified" for dirty dirty purposes.
12. Neverwhere - February 17, 2010 1:39 PM
These atrocities were already mocked on Regretsy a few days ago :-P
http://www.regretsy.com/2010/02/15/pillow-biter/
13. brick - February 17, 2010 1:40 PM
FIRST!
14. GroxXx - February 17, 2010 1:49 PM
@8 I lol'd.
Also, this is shit u.u.
15. alioth - February 17, 2010 1:51 PM
What's with the ET necks...weird
16. cabbo - February 17, 2010 2:06 PM
I wonder how many mothers are going to catch their daughters dry humping these things?
Actually, I wonder how many daughters are going to catch their mothers dry humping these things.
@10 Pink smurfafice or brown smurfafice?
17. atheistgirl - February 17, 2010 2:15 PM
Gee, they look awful. Why would anybody want one of those?
If you're that sad and lonely buy a cat or 12.
18. Ollie Williams - February 17, 2010 2:16 PM
Can I get the chicks boobs as a pillow? Please?
19. Blastphemer - February 17, 2010 2:18 PM
Somebody hand me a bucket of stakes and silver bullets...I'm puttin this fad to rest right here, right now. - Van Blastphemer
PS. cabbo - as hot as that image may be...can girls really "dry" hump? Sorry...couldn't help myself.
20. Birr Murdock - February 17, 2010 2:43 PM
she sort of looks like my ex gf. except a little uglier. also, all asians look alike. also, i would like a full sized pillow made with my nude body printed on it.
21. AshleyGreenIsHot - February 17, 2010 2:47 PM
I'll bet these pillows act as well as Taylor Lautner. I swear that boy is made of wood (and not the kind your sister likes me to give her).
22. Pat - February 17, 2010 3:06 PM
@18 They have mousepads for that, you know.
23. Closet Nerd - February 17, 2010 3:07 PM
@16 i want to violate her blue smurfafice
and who is the dummy? the pillow? or the person who spends $35 on it?
24. fpelayo - February 17, 2010 3:33 PM
LOL, the Edward one appeared on Regretsy earlier this week.
25. St Cup o' Water - February 17, 2010 3:39 PM
the 2nd pic: Isn't that Charlie Brooker?
26. Blastphemer - February 17, 2010 3:48 PM
@25 looks more like Chuck Bass. NOT that I've EVER seen an episode of Gossip Girl, or anything!!! Holy crap...it DOES NOT get much gayer than that.
Please hand me my fail sword now...I must impale myself upon its blade yet again.
27. cabbo - February 17, 2010 4:00 PM
@20 I can see why she's an 'ex' girlfriend.
@25 No, it's satan, released from his binds, here to comfort little girls...
Oh my God. It all makes sense now. This twilight fad - it's not about chastity. Not about chastity at all - (*cuts open pillow) - It's not a Manallow - it's a Pedollow! Run! Tell the people! Save your daughters!
28. Dishy D - February 17, 2010 4:09 PM
(link: pic from regresty comment)
The neck+head is long enough to hide a jumbo ... er ... neck bone. The kind with batteries.
You just have to scissor off the head.
29. cabbo - February 17, 2010 4:43 PM
@28 Remove the head, or destroy the brain? Zombie vampire pillows?
30. iheartwood - February 18, 2010 3:51 AM
LOL..! they look dumb dumb in pillow forms. At $35?!?! no way
31. Laurenzio - February 18, 2010 4:39 AM
LOL Hell to the manllows, her headboard looks like battenburg cake! NOM NOM NOM.
32. Ickorus - February 18, 2010 5:29 AM
No offence to anyone with down syndrome (I know you don't want to be linked in any way to twilight) but the one on the left looks like he has down syndrome.
33. Ickorus - February 18, 2010 5:33 AM
The other one looks like Mafioso.
34. Jennifer - February 18, 2010 1:16 PM
But hey, at least the pillow version probably isn't allergic to vagina
http://www.celebitchy.com/91388/robert_pattinson_is_allergic_to_vaginas_seriously/
35. ciao - February 20, 2010 1:36 AM
they look like albino aliens wearing cheesy masks you get at those dollar trees.