Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial

November 15, 2009 - November 21, 2009 Archives

  • November 21, 2009
    Trading in worthless gold for cats: 14K genius. Say -- can I see that ring? Cats For Gold Thanks to catsforgold, Seth, Alex and mary91, who, hey what happened to my necklace? Oh that's right I TURNED IT INTO CATS.... / Continue →
  • November 21, 2009
    You know the new Tony Hawk: Ride game that comes with a skateboard peripheral? This is a dog playing it -- and he's pretty good (except the 360 was obviously FAAAAKE). Which brings up an interesting question -- what is it with bulldogs and skateboarding? They love that shit ... / Continue →
  • November 21, 2009
    A passenger plane headed for an airport in eastern Congo overshot the runway (spider solitaire) and ended up crash-landing in lava. Wicked! Of course, I'm making this cooler than it actually was because it wasn't molten lava and it wasn't in the middle of a volcano. Truthful... / Continue →
  • November 21, 2009
    They're slippers. They're made out of bread. You can wear them then eat them. But you won't, because that's disgusting. I jest, knowing you you probably will. Freak. Just remember to take them off first. Martynas Birskys of the Vilnius-based design studio DaDaDa sells sl... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    Google toilet paper: made with 100% virgin pulp and available in Vietnam. Per a questionable translation of the text on the bag: "Very long, soft, smooth. Of high vacuum, because you always!" HIGH VACUUM, OF COURSE I ALWAYS! Dingleberry free, just sayin'. This Google's made... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    WARNING: NSFW VIDEO IS NSFW This is the highly, highly, HIGHLY NSFW music video for the Flair's 'Truckers Delight'. I can't even begin to describe to you how dirty I felt after watching it. Unless you've ever swam in pig shit and then showered in vomit afterward. In which c... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    Want to look like you're a cyborg or some shit? I couldn't imagine why (unless you want me to brain you with a crowbar), but if you do, just glue an on/off switch to the back of your head like Dominic Wilcox did. But, WARNING: your hats won't fit the same! Neat idea, Dominic... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    I can't even imagine weaving bacon so tight as to not let liquid (well, molten cheese) through, but apparently somebody did. My hat oven mitts are off to you, bacon mug maker. Cause one time I tried weaving bacon and it didn't even make a solid placemat. It did, however, mak... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    The Humunga Stache is a $12 piece of molded rubber. One side's a ball, and the other is giant freaking mustache. So when your dog bites the ball, guess what happens! (Hint: you take pictures and post them Facebook with clever captions). Add some low-cost laughs to your fre... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    In a mash-up of universes that's about to make my head explode, it turns out Tusken Raiders love Scooby Snacks. And speaking of which -- I'd like to see Scoob and the gang try pulling THAT dude's mask off. Ruh-roh is right -- you gonna die! Sand People like Scooby Snacks [tk... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    Mass We Pray is a video game to get that Holy Spirit all up in your system and have fun with the whole family at the same time. With fun interactive mini-games like 'Conduct the Choir' and 'Genuflecting', you're sure to make Jesus proud (who's ALWAYS watching, BTW). Looks fun... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    How would you like this creepy little bastard staring at your ass when you're performing squats? Or maybe holding your feet while you do crunches? Or maybe you've got to be out of your got-damn mind! Bandit is helping the University of Southern California Center for Robotics... / Continue →
  • November 20, 2009
    The latest in a string of taco-related violence, a masked marauder in Illinois held up another man at machete-point and demanded the poor chap's tacos. Admit it -- if you'd have had a machete you would have done the same thing! Elgin Deputy Police Chief Jeff Swoboda says a lo... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    We saw another steering wheel desk here on Geekologie quite some time ago, but I think we can all agree this is a much improved model. First of all, you can write/type at a normal angle and not the angle of the actual wheel. As a matter of fact, I'm using one now, and I've go... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    Wonder what the Gorn and Salt Vampire that were supposed to appear in the new Star Trek's deleted Rura Penthe Klingon prison scenes looked like? This. Good lookin', but I'll take a steroid abuser in a dinosaur mask any day. I'm serious, just show up. J.J. Abrams' Version Of... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    NOTE: Video slightly NSFW due to adult language from a limey 14-year old. You ever wonder what else is going on in the world of a kid who will cry and punch the wall about a video game not living up to his expectations? Apparently a budding music career. And by budding I m... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    These Pick Your Nose party cups from Fred are a set of 24 cups (2 each of 12 designs) with different noses printed on them. That way you can easily identify your beverage and not end up drinking from somebody's dipping spit-cup. WHICH HAPPENS. Plus, you you get to spice up y... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    I like this clock. I can't exactly say why but I think it's because it costs $2,338 and is definitely something my son team of highly skilled artisans could recreate for a fraction of the cost, ultimately saving you, the sucker, a bundle. one of our favorite wall clocks, the ... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    Looking for the latest and least greatest in iPhone apps? Check out the $1 "Blower" app. It sucks blows sucks and blows is f***ing stupid. Thanks to the new "Blower" app, iPhone owners will now be able to blow out candles with their handset. Just "switch on your app, turn th... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    Because soon everything will be available pork-flavored, J&D's is selling bacon-flavored popcorn. I assume it's just regular popcorn with their bacon-salt added to the bag, but what do I know? Besides everything because God and I are like this *crossing fingers to show extreme... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    Yay, two laser posts in a row! The $17 FroliCat BOLT is an award winning laser lightshow for cats with owners who are too lazy to wave a laser pointer around or have lost the use of their limbs. Simply turn it on and projects a red dot and moves it in random patterns for 15 m... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    Laser Crosswalks are the crosswalks of the future. You can tell because it has 'laser' in the name. Pretty much anything with 'laser' in it is gonna be a huge hit in the future (including cereal). Don't believe me? Just stare at this laser eye-toy for a minute. Aaaaand now... / Continue →
  • November 19, 2009
    I'm sure lots of time and effort went into the construction of this Jabba the Hutt cake, but that doesn't mean I'd eat it. You see, I have a rule about eating things that look like slippery green turds: make somebody else try it first. Which, *cocking laser blaster* is why yo... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    This is a little gallery of superhero shaggin' wagons. They're all Photoshopped, but that isn't stopping me from wanting to sleep in one. Gosh, I can't even remember the last time I made love in the back of a 70's van BECAUSE I BLACKED OUT LAST NIGHT. But seriously, I barely... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    This handsome dapper portly half-Santa isn't the man in the story, but that doesn't matter. What's important is that he practices good dental hygiene. Also, that some cat named d'Armond Speers decided to only speak Klingon to his son for the first three years of his life. Bu... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    This is a video of the workers in a Microsoft store dancing around and clapping like the bunch of out-of-shape retail employees they are. That said, I would've passed out halfway through the song BUT ONLY CAUSE I'D BEEN DRINKING. The Blackeyed Peas compel the employees at the... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    Well folks, it happened. The Pirate Bay BitTorrent tracker officially kicked the bucket yesterday. What does this mean for Pirate Bay users? Although the site will remain operational for now, millions of BitTorrent users will lose the use of its tracker and will instead ha... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    A drunk and overzealous ninja, who may be the guy in this picture but was probably the kid in this video, attempted jumping over a fence in Seattle, Washington, only to impale himself on a pole. I knew about buttpirates, but who knew there were buttninjas too?! You're no drunk... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    Listen, I'm not here to tell you to follow Jesus or smoke buddha or whatever, I'm just here to report the things I see and maybe make a couple drug connections in the process. And this is a 'dinosaur eating the Jesus fish' car decal. Love it or hate it, you've got to admit it... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    If you're not familiar with shirt.woot, congratulations, and welcome to the internet. There's lots of stuff in this series of tubes, including, and virtually limited to: misinformation and porn. Also, Geekologie and stuff for sale. And speaking of stuff for sale, $10 will ge... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    This is a 'Pulp Fiction' styled Mario animation that Geekologie Reader Jeremie made. It is most impressive and has restored my faith in Geekologie Readers. For awhile there I was worried you were just a bunch of no-talent FIRST!ing ass-hats. So yeah -- thanks Jeremie, I need... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    Remember how you heard J.J. Abrams snuck R2-D2 somewhere in the new Star Trek movie? And remember how you kept going back to the theater with the hopes of spotting him? God, you need a hobby. I dunno, World of Warcraft or something. Anyway, thanks to the recent release of th... / Continue →
  • November 18, 2009
    This is a clever answer to a query posed in Yahoo! Answers. You can't argue the answerer didn't give them exactly what they asked for, even if it's not what they wanted. Because, let's face it, a lot of people don't even know what they want. I'm looking at you, Mrs.Takes 8 M... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    Remember the video of the world's drunkest/crunkest/least stand-uppiest man trying to score some beer from the convenience store? Well it turns out he was battling a previously unseen wizard trying to prevent him from drinking and walking. This security footage, enhanced with... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    The Bender House looks like Bender's dome from Futurama. If you've never seen Futurama I'm going to assume you don't have a television or internet so you probably aren't even reading this. Unless they print out copies of Geekologie and distribute them in Africa, which, I thin... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    This is a video of a woman "singing" the vocals on Afterlife's 'Avenged Sevenfold' in Rock Band 2 on expert with a flute. I've known you could do this for awhile because all that matters is that you hit the right pitch. WHICH, TEAM, IS EXACTLY HOW YOU HIT HOME RUNS. Now get ... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    Well folks, this just goes to show you can only dangle from rooftops staring into women's bedroom windows for so long before the boys in blue take notice. For shame, Spidey, for shame. And, on a completely and totally unrelated note that has absolutely nothing to do with this... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    Berry Plastics and the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers teamed up to develop X-Flex, a wallpaper with woven Kevlar strong enough to prevent bomb blasts from blowing all your shit up. Nice, but is it Big Bad Wolf proof? That mother can huff and puff! X-Flex works so well that t... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    Gosh, it seems like only yesterday I was hard at working fashioning a bong out of my gerbil's old Habitrail. But it wasn't, it was this morning I'm doing it right now. Anybody have a hot glue gun? The Gerbil Shirt wraps your torso in plastic tube passageways, making your bod... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    Just look at that cute little devil wrapped up all tight in his egg! It's like he's a little present himself -- all he needs is a bow! Show your strictly platonic dino-love this holiday season with this $14 Brachiosaurus hatchling ornament from the Big Bad Toy Store. They ma... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    To demonstrate how good the atmosphere looks on a Toshiba television, the company floated an armchair and camera up to 98,000-feet with a helium balloon. It's a really beautiful thing to watch, right up there with catfights at the bar. Gouge her eyes out! Toshiba and Youtube... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    In a feat of extreme-mowing, two men in Cambridge, New Zealand used a crane to lift a lawnmower high enough to trim one's overgrown hedges. Nice, guys, I like the way you think -- EXXXTREME!! The operator, who did not want to be named, is now nursing a broken hand, but said i... / Continue →
  • November 17, 2009
    This is a photo taken by Flickr user Meow Cely of a girl with 'pew pew' tattooed across her fingers. I must admit, I admire her dedication to the pews. You don't see me rocking any pew-y ink (except in THIS post), and I'm one of the the laser blaster's biggest proponents. Fu... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    I can't believe it took this long. And, who knows, maybe it's happened before. I mean, birds shit on my car all the time. Cats too. And, at least twice this year, a homeless man. Well, from a purely technical standpoint, that was actually IN the car. And speaking of which... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    Two extreme sporters used particularly gusty winds today to fulfill their live's dreams: to jump Worthing Pier in West Sussex, England, on kite-boards. It's time to dream bigger, brahs! Jake Scrace, 25, and Lewis Crathern, 24, had been planning Monday morning's jump for three... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    Because even problematic varmints deserve a proper burial to ensure their Micky Mouse souls can get into heaven, design studen Sarah Déry created these mouse trap coffins. This package was developed to solve the problem of neatly disposing of caught vermin by building the tra... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    NOTE: NSFW DUE TO LANGUAGE. WATCH IT WITH HEADPHONES ON OR THE VOLUME LOW. There's rock bottom, and then they're webcam-ing yourself crying and punching the wall over your disappointment about Modern Warfare 2. Jesus, kid, fix yourself a spot of tea and calm the f*** down. ... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    I hate out of season articles as much as you do, but this tauntaun Halloween costume by Scott Holden was too good not to post. Plus, I'd have already forgotten about it by the time Halloween rolls around next year (booze). Scott made this amazing costume from scratch. Using... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    Belle Starenchak, better known as Pikachu Girl, or "PikaBelleChu", is now engaged DESPITE MY MUCH EARLIER PROPOSAL. I asked first, jerkbag. I was gonna catch all that! When Chris Herbert decided to pop the question to his girlfriend of three years, Belle Starenchak, he pick... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    I love tequila sunrises. You know why? They're fruity, come with a little umbrella, and go down great with breakfast. Which, more often than not, is two quarts of mimosas I mixed into an orange juice carton. I SHOULD WRITE A BOOK ON EATING HEALTHY. But, for those of you th... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    This is a three-minute video of a woman reading the tale of Bioshock to a little kid old-ass man as a bedtime story. And, as a guy who recently played through Bioshock with his older brother (with all the lights on, and never after 7PM), I thought it was pretty good. But... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    Apparently battery-powered illuminated liquor bottles are becoming all the rage. They're supposed to grab your attention when you're trying to decide what to order at the bar. Yeah, TOO BAD I ALREADY KNOW WHAT I WANT (one of everything -- and keep the cherries coming). Balla... / Continue →
  • November 16, 2009
    For those of you that like to get high and lie in the middle of a field staring up, the Leonid meteor shower is supposed to reach its peak tonight from 1AM to dawn. Great, I'll be hiding in the back of the hallway closet waiting for the apocalypse. It, uh, is 2012, right? T... / Continue →
  • November 15, 2009
    The Gaon Street Lamp was designed by Haneum Lee to turn trash into treasure. If light is treasure, which it's not. So I have no idea why I said that. Besides I'm awesome and I meant it. the Gaon street light/wastebasket concept composts biodegradable waste and uses the meth... / Continue →
  • November 15, 2009
    This is a video of fifth-grader Will Smith (of Fresh Prince fame) singing 'Windows 7 Rising', a song about the operating system sung to the tune of CCR's 'Bad Moon Rising', at what I assume is a school-sponsored talent show. He's pretty skilled and undoubtedly left the stage t... / Continue →
  • November 15, 2009
    I think we all knew this day would come: Envelopes with bacon-flavored adhesive. Geez, these are almost as clever as my invention: nipple flavored envelopes. Which, I think you and I both know is the closest your tongue will ever come. J&D's, the makers of Bacon Salt and Bac... / Continue →
  • November 15, 2009
    Because I love you all and am so proud of your accomplishments, here's Geekologie Reader Brian's recent Cisco Systems "bars" tattoo. For those of you not in the know, it's a stylized version of the Golden Gate Bridge. AND YES TATTOOS COUNT AS ACCOMPLISHMENTS. But, no matter ... / Continue →