Sep 15 2009In The Land Of The Blind, The Man With One Eye Is King: Ridiculous Cyclops Sunglasses

I don't wear sunglasses because I like squinting, but for those of you that do, and only have one giant eye, maybe these new Martin Margiela sunglasses are for you. Sure they look like a giant windshield and cost $570, but that's a small price to pay for looking like a giant Miami douche-hydrant, am I right? Of course I am. Unless we're talking about handed, in which case I'm left. Speaking of which -- remember that no child left behind program? It's a lie (my parents abandoned me at a water park).
Martin Margiela Sunglasses [likecool]
Thanks to naas, who doesn't wear sunglasses BECAUSE HE OPTS FOR DUAL EYE PATCHES. Damn yeah, matey!
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Reader Comments
1. Doofus - September 15, 2009 1:01 PM
WINNER !
2. Bridgette - September 15, 2009 1:01 PM
Just bought a pair!
3. saviourman - September 15, 2009 1:02 PM
title's from minority report.
don't like the glasses though. you'd look a bit too robot-like wearing methinks
4. Jiakasuma - September 15, 2009 1:03 PM
@2 Right on! I guess I'm the only one rolling with these!
5. Davo - September 15, 2009 1:03 PM
So where is a picture of the d-bag wearing these with collar popped?
6. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - September 15, 2009 1:03 PM
...wouldn't the shades still need to sit on your nose for support?!? Poorly planned.
Also, they look dumb.
7. Doofus - September 15, 2009 1:03 PM
What ? You bought two ? Which reminds me...what the hell is a trouser ? As in 'pair of trousers' / Huh ?
8. Dream - September 15, 2009 1:04 PM
lol.
570?
Do you know how much energy drinks and tacos i can buy with that?!?! :O
9. Dishy Dishyington - September 15, 2009 1:07 PM
I used to wear these, 'till all the kids started calling me three-eyes.
10. a - September 15, 2009 1:08 PM
not gonna show a pic of someone wearing it?
11. Mr. cow - September 15, 2009 1:10 PM
Moo
12. LSDiesel - September 15, 2009 1:15 PM
@7, I know. Just because you have one eye doesn't mean you don't have nose. It may mean you don't have depth perception, but you should still have a nose at least. Sheesh.
I think Kanye West owns about 30 pairs.
13. MT - September 15, 2009 1:17 PM
but where does the nose go?
14. ciao - September 15, 2009 1:21 PM
@8 enough to kill me :D
15. griffin - September 15, 2009 1:23 PM
inb4 Turanga Leela
16. Johnny B - September 15, 2009 1:32 PM
15 beat me to it.
They're PERFECT for Turanga Leela (or Alcazar).
17. GoSS Jerk now sterilized for your pleasure - September 15, 2009 1:41 PM
I guess they couldnt get anyone to pose for the photo with those on...
18. Freddy k - September 15, 2009 1:41 PM
No picture of them actually being used? I call shenanigans! Ther is no way you will look cool wearing these.
For all of those that have "nose issues" apparently they sit on TOP of your nose. Look at the bottom of the glasses, you will see the nosepiece.
19. STOMPY - September 15, 2009 1:42 PM
@5
here is the dbag flowchart...
http://www.dealbreaker.com/images/entries/flowchart.jpg
20. Your Mom - September 15, 2009 1:51 PM
@18
"Hey Farva, whats the name of that place you like with the mozzerella sticks and all the goofy sh*t on the walls?"
"You mean Shenanigans?!"
21. Milkman - September 15, 2009 1:55 PM
Kayne West is really happy for this post. And he's gonna let you continue, But these sunglasses are the most awesome ever! The most awesome!
22. Jazzman - September 15, 2009 1:57 PM
Dude...you totally missed the opp to plug Leela from Futurama. That's one fine cyclops!!!
23. Genshi - September 15, 2009 1:59 PM
....
Any idea how I can contact the assholes responsible for stealing my intention?
24. Your Mom - September 15, 2009 2:01 PM
@23
Someone stole your intention to create an invention?
25. Genshi - September 15, 2009 2:01 PM
I mean invention. heybaw@webmail.com
26. Dogless - September 15, 2009 2:32 PM
@3
It's a sad world we live in when Hollywood (or PKD) is credited with creating a 500 year old proverb.
27. naas - September 15, 2009 3:00 PM
haha a miami-douche hydrant, so true GW so true
@20 meow
@22 I thought these designed fory Bender actually http://technabob.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/01/bender_casemod.jpg
28. nfo - September 15, 2009 3:05 PM
@3
you're retarded
the title is from the 15th century.
29. Johnny B - September 15, 2009 3:06 PM
@27
Bender has an internal shade he can lower in his visor when he needs it.
30. naas - September 15, 2009 3:13 PM
@29 what if it breaks or get's stuck, then what!? Besides I only said 'designed' for - bender would never wear something classy like this, it's not his style
31. naas - September 15, 2009 3:13 PM
ninjas could wear these also, the snobby ones anyways
32. Johnny B - September 15, 2009 3:17 PM
@30
Touche! Good point!
Bender is more of a monicle man anyway.
33. livingjetlag - September 15, 2009 3:32 PM
If you're going to throw down this kind of money, you might as well go for the "Teeny little solar powered windshield wipers" option.
34. Mr. pig - September 15, 2009 3:37 PM
Oink
35. GoSS Jerk now sterilized for your pleasure - September 15, 2009 4:01 PM
wow, we now have an oink poster...
36. sick to the power of me - September 15, 2009 4:13 PM
needs a windshield wiper
37. naas - September 15, 2009 4:13 PM
it's probably the cow guy, nobody was talking to the beef so now let's try bacon
38. Gargamel - September 15, 2009 4:14 PM
What's the black dude's name from star trek? Well, yeah...he'd could pull those off.
39. Joseph Moore - September 15, 2009 4:15 PM
As someone who is extremely blind, I actually think this is a great idea, almost. How they could make this lens for the partially blind is hard to imagine, as most blind people have vastly different vision in each eye. Still, if they could make it work, I would greatly consider purchasing these.
40. Mr. Dinosaur - September 15, 2009 4:15 PM
ROAR
41. Gargamel - September 15, 2009 4:17 PM
No clue why I said "HE'D could pull those off" in my previous post. Maybe because I'm an idiot.
42. Jim Jones - September 15, 2009 6:19 PM
Um, how do they sit on your nose? Or do you have to cut your nose off to wear the glasses?
43. Iris - September 15, 2009 6:21 PM
@6 its another word for pants
glasses get more retarded by the day
http://www.toxel.com/inspiration/2009/09/03/14-cool-and-creative-sunglasses/
44. Beep Boop - September 15, 2009 9:40 PM
Beep............Boop.
45. ted - September 15, 2009 10:39 PM
@38
i don't know..but he's on reading rainbow
46. Mo., Christo - September 16, 2009 6:31 AM
Are you kidding me?! Are you freaking kidding me?!?! This whole time you've been left-handed and I've been diligently checking your updates, latest posts, and every other form of hilariousness you've thrown our way without any prior knowledge or notice ?! Maybe there were signs . . . Maybe I was just naive . . . Maybe I should have known it was all too good to be true, but left-handed, seriously??? I have for years now been drawing attention to the fact that it cannot be proven that left-handed people have souls (think about it: can you REALLY prove it?) and of course the next logical step is - that's right, ROBOTS! Do Robots have souls? And if they developed handed-ness surely it would be the opposite of the majority of humanities' handed-ness . . . right? What, I'm not paranoid, YOU'RE PARANOID!!!!!
47. Frosty - September 16, 2009 6:53 AM
Does this thing come with wipers? O_O
48. Jaded Icon - September 16, 2009 6:56 AM
@ 47
Mr. Christo it's time to take your medicine. Oh, and can you put this wig and lipstick on as well? Thanks....
49. Geekogee - September 16, 2009 7:24 AM
Must See!!!
http://alturl.com/obg7
________________
50. taylor swiftly - September 16, 2009 11:05 AM
Those (that?) sunglasses (sunglass?) is soooooo kanye west.
51. Shox r4 shoes - September 20, 2009 9:57 AM
Shox r4 shoes