Sep 10 2009Finally: The Buckyball Haiku Contest Winners
First of all, I'd like to apologize for taking so long to grade your haiku, but I took my time and read EVERY SINGLE ONE. I just wasn't expecting 1,600 entries, since I didn't even get that many comments ON MY BIRTHDAY. Read: everyone who entered but didn't wish me a happy birthday was disqualified. I jest. But seriously, you all did great and I'm very proud of the quality of poetry (most of) you wrote. Also, a bunch of you are clearly special needs. But that's okay, so am I. We'll have more contests in the future just as soon as people contact me with free swag to give away (I'm looking at you, Mercedes). Also, I can't stress how near impossible it was to choose winners. I haven't slept in four days trying to sort through all this awesome. And now, the moment you've all been waiting for, the winners:
Grand Prize:
407. AM
Powered by man flesh
Robots hunt down last blogger
Cry Geekologie
Runners Up (in no particular order):
1014. pellaz
Red skies born in flame
Metal masters torment us
Prophet was ignored
74. Matt
On the internet,
Dangerous to go alone...
Take Geekologie
1221. well thats nice
The Robots bring doom
So before we are all killed
Post Zelda Side Boob
There you have it, I guess I was really feeling Zelda and the robot apocalypse (but don't think I didn't enjoy your dinosaur entries -- they made me so hot!). I will be contacting the winners tomorrow. And again, it really was impossible to choose winners. I had the field narrowed down to 190 (including yours) and had to choose four. But don't worry, you'll win next time. Thanks for participating everyone, and I don't care what everybody else says: you're all winners in my book.
Reader Comments
1. WHAT - September 10, 2009 4:03 AM
what do you mean I didn't win? but my mom said i m a winner!
2. FABY - September 10, 2009 4:08 AM
FIRST! oh s#it caps
3. FABY - September 10, 2009 4:09 AM
.....fail
4. Ste - September 10, 2009 4:13 AM
:(
5. PSSSHHHHT! - September 10, 2009 4:28 AM
PSSHHTT!
6. eron - September 10, 2009 4:30 AM
congratz
7. Dave - September 10, 2009 4:31 AM
Geekologie site
had a cool contest I lost.
I am disapoint.
:(
8. Dave - September 10, 2009 4:37 AM
Oh no! My mom warned:
"If your brain thinks in haiku,
it will stay like that!"
9. Brittney - September 10, 2009 5:48 AM
umm... yeah just do it
http://www.todaysbigthing.com/2009/09/04
10. Yep - September 10, 2009 6:14 AM
Ok, so what is the difference between Buckyballs Vs. Cybercube.
Besides the fact that Buckyballs sounds like a a horny woman's play thing.
11. noodle - September 10, 2009 6:37 AM
shenanigans!!
12. Geekogee - September 10, 2009 6:45 AM
Must See!!!
http://alturl.com/obg7
________________
13. Mr. cow - September 10, 2009 7:16 AM
Moo
14. Kokopure - September 10, 2009 7:31 AM
Haha, those were good ones, I can see why you had a tough time if there were more like that. I'll definitely enter more contests next time!
15. lee.harless - September 10, 2009 7:44 AM
well, congrats to the winners! ...now get the eff outta the studio. ...don't come back.
16. Some chick - September 10, 2009 8:21 AM
Happy Birthday GW!
You did a good job
even though I didn't win
now no boobs for you
17. Melissa - September 10, 2009 8:35 AM
pout :(
18. benson - September 10, 2009 8:44 AM
lol the grandprix
its comedic gold
or goblin's gold
either way its sweet, delicious gold
19. Iris - September 10, 2009 8:49 AM
ehh suddenly you don't you look so hot anymore... jk i love you gw!
20. Eskimo Dave - September 10, 2009 8:56 AM
Haikus are so 1999...
This content was stupid and this site has definitely jumped the shark.
21. Pat - September 10, 2009 8:58 AM
@21 Go back to Communist China, huh.
22. King of the Asians - September 10, 2009 9:13 AM
Some how I knew #74 would be up there, but I think #503 desirves an honorable mention.
23. Dekar - September 10, 2009 9:30 AM
Robot allegiance
Spare me, robot overlords
I have motor oil
24. Freddy K - September 10, 2009 9:31 AM
so.... where is the Zelda side boob?
I'm waiting.
25. pw5 - September 10, 2009 9:32 AM
I dont give a f that I lost, I've already won the Sacred Heart University Rycenga Scholar (2000-01) and Archbishop Edward T. O'Meara Journalism Awards (Honorable Mention, magazine category, 2008)
so suck it.
26. glace neuf - September 10, 2009 9:46 AM
re-programming my robot maid as a Geekologie Writer terminator right now - my haiku was tubular, brah!
27. Katharine - September 10, 2009 9:52 AM
just wanted to say
that i love geekologie.
I JUST LOST THE GAME.
28. OJ's Mom - September 10, 2009 10:20 AM
@21 - I wipe my ass with your comment.
29. pete - September 10, 2009 10:35 AM
Can't believe GW didn't go for the boob-offering haiku entry. Madness.
30. The NON Era - September 10, 2009 10:39 AM
Holy Sh*t.
I didn't enter this because I figured that people would actually TRY.
These are f*cking terrible.
If I stuffed my c*ck and balls into a mincer, added olive oil, cooked it and sold it as apples, I would have more success than the 1st place "winner".
"Powered by man flesh
Robots hunt down last blogger
Cry Geekologie"
Seriously....this....won?
What f*cking retarded mongloid post-abortion came up with this absolute shite?
If I crapped out a lifetime's worth of sh*t in a single sitting, it would stink less than one measure of this f*cking dirty flayed fist-f*ck.
Shame on you to who-the-f*ck-ever thought this was submittable and a BIG ol' WHAT THE F*CK to the seasoned cock-meat that thought this was winrar.
In short, f*ck you.
31. naas - September 10, 2009 10:40 AM
I'm suprised
PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW
PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW
PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW
didn't even make runner up. That was a good one IMO, the 1st one anyways.
Congrats to all who won & to GW for finally getting back to normal - sort of
32. Melonie - September 10, 2009 10:41 AM
If you were going for the robot apocalypse tone, you really should have at least given an honorable mention to the guy that did his in binary. That was effin awesome.
And for the record, the only reason I didn't wish you happy birthday was because I was on vacation and there was no wifi in BFE. Even if there was, I don't like to take my laptop camping. She doesn't dig the mosquitos and complains too much about the campfire smoke and sleeping on an air mattress.
33. Heather - September 10, 2009 10:44 AM
#31 dude.... it was just a contest..... chill the f*ck out
Congrats to the winners, i hope you enjoy your balls! *sigh* maybe on day i will know the awesomeness that is buckyballs
34. Zombite - September 10, 2009 11:01 AM
@ 12 - Are brutes like the new rick roll? It's really not as funny or maddening, but i guess it's a start.
35. Lizzie - September 10, 2009 11:07 AM
aww man :(:(
I actually had a dream the other night that I won, it was weird. I need to get a life.
36. Zombite - September 10, 2009 11:16 AM
@ 31 Given the contest and site theme that was completely acceptable. You should stop spitting out the medication your doctors give you, cause it's making you dumb. If you think our so good then why don't you write one about your dad repeatedly raping you when you were 12. Don't you dare tell me your dad's dead either cause you will only succeed in making me laugh as I bang your mom. Whoops! sorry I meant your dog. Cause at least with your dog it feels less like bestiality. I know you know what I'm talking about.
37. naas - September 10, 2009 11:21 AM
I was hoping to see some BOWLING buckyballs by now, imagine rolling a few hundred of those down a hill in san francisco during lunchtime on a sunday afternoon
38. Jaded Icon - September 10, 2009 11:22 AM
@ 31
I agree with @37....
39. wmaxwell - September 10, 2009 11:23 AM
@31 - Put up or STFU a**hole.
40. smtippin - September 10, 2009 12:09 PM
that 1st runner up was 100% better than the others...including the winner. I say this contest was rigged.
s
41. Bee - September 10, 2009 12:25 PM
I Thought I Would Win
But I Lost This Time Around
I Will Go Cry Now
42. scurl - September 10, 2009 12:29 PM
this reminds me of the fact that i never get anywhere near winning anything. wait, whoa!? you all see that?! i was one of the final 109! WHOOHOOOOOO!!!!!
i'm gonna get drunk.
it's good that i didn't win, though, because i heard bad things can happen when you eat two magnets, and man...you put balls in my hand and they're pretty much bound to end up in my mouth at some point....er, i mean, uh....look at 'em boobies!
!YEAH!
43. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - September 10, 2009 1:19 PM
I'm kinda glad I didn't win. I realized later I didn't use a real email address... D'oh!
WTF, wasn't GW's b-day a few months ago...
44. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - September 10, 2009 1:20 PM
N/M - I should read more...
45. lol - September 10, 2009 2:21 PM
"1221. well thats nice" had the best one
46. 1-Ton - September 10, 2009 3:07 PM
I thought for sure that my recognition that the "bacon kids" rant was in itself a Haiku (nearly) would have gotten me an honorable mention or something. Oh well, I suck at contest anyways.
47. Beastman AIDS - September 10, 2009 4:46 PM
Congratulations to the winner you big lucky nipple.
I'm convinced mine must have been the 4th honorable mention.
48. Bob Greenberg - September 10, 2009 7:12 PM
#31 is absolutely right. I don't think there would have been as many entries if we'd known that the contest was for the developmentally disabled. I thought the goal of this exercise was to be *creative.*
Seriously and without sarcasm - the 'winning haikus' sucked. There were dozens of better ones among the 1600 submitted. I guess GW got tired of reading after 45 minutes or so, and just picked #s at random.
I'm guessing knock-knock jokes are next? Fare the well, Geekologie.
49. tasteless monkey brains - September 10, 2009 8:12 PM
geekologie chump
denied my awesome haiku
he can suck a dong
50. Dishy Dishyington - September 10, 2009 8:17 PM
Knock knock.
Who's there?
#49.
Go away.
51. Yutzwagon - September 10, 2009 9:01 PM
Awww you're so sweet Geekologie man.
Mine wan't bad, but I realized I was one syllable over in the middle line like 2 days after posting. Baww.
52. Paul - September 10, 2009 9:43 PM
That elf-looking person is not named "Zelda"! His name is Link, and he has a penis, and that "hot zelda girl" from Comicon is actually an adolescent boy. You're all gay, pedos, and going to jail.
53. psst....hey Paul - September 10, 2009 9:48 PM
Zelda is the name of the princess, k?
54. Englishly Jolted - September 10, 2009 9:54 PM
The middle line of the winner's haiku is eight syllables. I vote that this is not a haiku, but a mockery. I want those Buckyballs... :(
55. Recheck. - September 10, 2009 9:57 PM
@55. Read it again. I know it may make you think that there is a "the" in the second line, but there is not. It is 7 syllables and the winner. I still think you should get the Buckyballs though...:)
56. snop - September 11, 2009 1:13 AM
you fail..Geekwriter
Winner should go to
Number Ten Fourteen
a traditional form of Japanese poetry, usually dealing with nature
57. Snop - September 11, 2009 1:15 AM
lol @55
58. snop - September 11, 2009 1:26 AM
@31.
Thank you....
Gw i will not come back to your site again.
59. Poopenmeir - September 11, 2009 1:51 AM
contest was subjective to the judge. just 'cause you don't like it doesn't mean he agrees with you. if you lost, get over it, you only lost the chance to get something for almost nothing.
if you think you can do better than the winner, post it, though it'll probably suck
60. gjdkgj - September 11, 2009 2:10 AM
Nike Football Shoes
Thanks for posting, I really enjoyed your most recent post. I think you should post more often, you obviously have natural ability for blogging!
61. Mike - September 11, 2009 8:13 AM
I DIDNT FRIGGING WIN? I'M COMING FOR YOU GW. YOU BETTER LEARN TO SLEEP WITH ....... MORE THAN ONE EYE OPEN. OOH! and have dinosaurs guarding you. I love the occasional T Rex ribs...
62. . - September 11, 2009 2:46 PM
@22, more like Communist Russia or even Alaska, considering the whole eskimo thing...
63. well thats nice - September 11, 2009 4:55 PM
Zelda side boob FTRU!
@31 I fail English? That’s un-possible.
64. nike r4 - September 11, 2009 11:03 PM
I bookmarked this site, Thank you for good job! Thank you! I would now go on this blog every day!
65. AM - September 12, 2009 12:15 AM
Awesome, just let me know where to send my info. Its an honor just to be mentioned in the same company as zelda side boob.
66. Eulalia - September 12, 2009 3:24 PM
Zelda side boob was the best! ( 0 )( 0 )
67. AM - September 14, 2009 1:27 PM
Haven't been contacted yet Geekologie, have you sent out emails?
68. Pellaz - September 14, 2009 4:18 PM
AM - don't think he's sent anything out yet.
69. AM - September 14, 2009 9:48 PM
Thanks, worried my hyperactive spam blocker had broken everything.