Sep 25 2009 Whee!: Beer Blaster Shoots Beer, Soda
The Beer Blaster is a $23 beer/soda pistol available from ThinkGeek that punctures a shaken can and uses the carbonation to blast your enemies with sticky sodie (or a friend's open's mouth with delicious beer) from up to 10 feet. Also, who would have thought that Harry Potter would turn from a life of magic to a life of contributing to the delinquency of minors on the playground? Didn't see that one coming! Or did I? I totally did.
ThinkGeek Product Site
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Beer Blaster [likecool]
Thanks to Ste, who once shot himself in the face with a keg and was the life of the party. But did you wear a lampshade and piss in the stove?
Sep 25 2009 THERE IS NOTHING OKAY ABOUT THIS
This is a video of the government's latest flying cyborg beetles in action. That's right, ACTUAL LIVE beetles being remotely controlled via implanted electrodes. Just wait till the government gets its hands on you!
"We demonstrated the remote control of insects in free flight via an implantable radioequipped miniature neural stimulating system," the researchers reported in their new paper for Frontiers in Integrative Neuroscience. " The pronotum mounted system consisted of neural stimulators, muscular stimulators, a radio transceiver-equipped microcontroller and a microbattery."
The research, supported by the Pentagon's Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, is part of a broader effort, called the HI-MEMS program, which has been looking specifically at different approaches to implanting micro-mechanical systems into insects in order to control their movements.
OH HELLLLLL NO. You show me one person who thinks this is okay and I'll show you a got-damn freedom hating communist. Just sayin', I saw that sickle and hammer tattoo!
Video: Pentagon's Cyborg Beetle Takes Flight [wired]
Thanks to Danny, Mycropht, Bo, Mike, Zach, Jason, Peterman and TobyRaider, who already have government chips implanted in their brains that make them irresistible to women. WHERE WAS I ON THAT, THE MAN?!
Sep 25 2009 Force Choke (And Spit Up): Baby Vaders
Apparently these costumes have been around for a while now but I didn't know because I don't have any business shopping for Darth Vader baby get-ups (I just sign the child support checks). But Geekologie Reader Tengku Edzuan decided to take a different approach to child rearing and bought this costume for his son. That's him there. Cute, huh? BUT DON'T EVEN THINK FOR A SECOND HE'S NOT ALL DARK SITH LORD, because he 100% is. I heard one time he caught a stuffed animal eying his binky and Force choke-slammed that sucker into a pile of alphabet blocks. Brutal!
Barf Vader [edzuantengku]
and
Product Site
Sep 25 2009 They're Hugging Me!: Teddy Bear Jacket
This is a jacket made out of teddy bears from artist/designer Sebastian Errazuriz (who also brought us the zipper dress). I like it, it looks really comfortable. Now I know what you're thinking, "I bet that son of a bitch GW still sleeps with a teddy bear!" AND SO WHAT IF I DO? I bet yooooou still sleep with your parents! Kidding, I'd know if you did. HIYO! Your dad's a snorer.
Hit the jump for a couple more sexy shots. I can't help it, I love bears!
Sep 25 2009 Looks Promising: Halo Anime Series Preview
Here are a couple video previews of the upcoming Halo Legends anime series due out later this fall. I thought they looked okay. I mean, it's no Cowboy Bebop, but then again, THERE'S NO DOG NAMED EINSTEIN (I'm partial to dogs named Einstein, you see. Especially scruffy ones!). So yeah, what do you guys think? Excited? Indifferent? Would you rather watch paint dry? Or would you rather watch me eat lead-based paint chips? CAUSE I WOULD DO THAT FOR YOU!
Hit the jump for another one, which is mostly horn-tooting for the people who made it.
Continue Reading " Looks Promising: Halo Anime Series Preview "
Sep 25 2009 Oooh, Pretty!: Conceptual Glass Rubik's Cube
This might be what a Rubik's Cube would look like if it were made out of glass. Except mine would be sharper because I shattered that bitch on my head like an empty beer bottle. WHO'S TOUGH?! Not me, I just drink too much and stop feeling. That said, I feel like no matter what side you're looking at on this thing it's gonna appear brown. Everyone's a winner! Except me. I always lose. My house keys. Call the paramedics, I'm gonna break another window!
Glass Rubik's Cube Looks Groovy! [walyou]
Sep 24 2009 For The Ladies: This Ridiculous-Ass Shoe
Yes, that's a shoe. And it's ridiculous looking, isn't it? I know -- what's the matter with flip-flops? I don't get it either. YES I'M JUST JEALOUS!
And a high heel shoe at that. Designed by London architect Julian Hakes, the Mojito shoe is made of carbon fiber--to give it strength and spring--and laminated with rubber on the bottom and leather--from furniture manufacturers in High Wycombe, England--on top.
I can't even begin to imagine how you put that thing on. You could lock me in a room with a pair of these for an hour, and when you came back and I've one have on dangling from an ear and a high-heel sized bulge in my shorts. Yeah, I'd be waving it at ya.
Wait, This Is a Shoe? [gizmodo]
Sep 24 2009 Pop Art Paintball: Marilyn In A Minute
Sure this might not be as impressive as creating a paintball Mona Lisa in a split-second, but it's still pretty neat (skip to 0:40 for the action). And speaking of neat, it's the only way I drink my bourbon. I don't need your newfangled ice!
Thanks to Rodrigo, who once paintballed his way out of a wet paper bag. But you had scissors in your hands, bro! You could have saved the ammo. You'll never survive the zombie apocalypse!
Sep 24 2009 But It'll Scare All My Garden Gnomes Away!: Super Mario Piranha Plant Lawn Ornament
DeviantARTist Kalupsa went and made an incredibly detailed (and frightening) Super Mario Piranha Plant lawn ornament out of modeling clay. And I think we can all agree, it's scary as shit. I sure as hell wouldn't water it, if you know what I mean. I'm talking about try to piss on it. NOT a good idea.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots and a video of how it was made.
Sep 24 2009 Be Like Obama: Pac-Man Laptop Stickers
AAAAHH, HE'S POINTING DIRECTLY AT MY SOUL! But that's not the point, the point is that there's little Pac-Man looking sticker (which I'm pretty sure is actually a Chain Chomp sans chain) on the president's MacBook Pro. And now you can have one just like it for the low, low introductory price of $3 (or 5 for $12)!
These Pacman stickers in dark blue are now available for sale from Obama Pacman! Works on your Apple laptop, including MacBook, MacBook Pro, MacBook Air, your Apple desktop, including iMac, Mac Pro, and maybe even a Mac Mini. These high quality stickers will also work for PCs and almost anything else you can get your hands on.
OMG, Pac is headed right for that apple! Don't eat it, Pac, DON'T DO IT! *om nom nom nom* Thanks a lot jerk, now we have to leave the garden. Say -- think you could get the missus to flash us all before we go?
Sep 24 2009 Remove The Knuckles And The Fingers Will Die: Hardcore Zombie Tattoo
Wait, so does that mean he IS a zombie? Beause it doesn't say '#1 zombie slaya', it just says 'zombie'. Who knows, maybe he didn't have enough fingers for all that. Or brains. Get it? Zombie joke!
Thanks to Emma, who once brained a zombie with a frying pan and didn't even lose the eggs she was cooking. Over-easy, Emma.
Sep 24 2009 Video Game Reality: Paperboy In Real Life
This is a video of the Atari classic Paperboy, but in real life. It's a little longer, and I know most of you have ADD (I'm right here with you), but it's definitely worth a watch while on the clock. Plus, the guys who made it are loyal Geekologists, and you know how I feel about you readers -- I love you all like little sisters! You know, from Bioshock. I'll harvest every last one of you!
Youtube
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Funnyordie
Thanks to D_rock and cooperanimation, who don't need paperboys because they only read Geekologie. Smart. Plus you're saving trees!
Sep 24 2009 I'd Rock That, INTO BATTLE: Ecko Unlimited Master Chief Hoodies
Looking to expand their line of geek-wear, Ecko Unlimited is releasing this $88 Master Chief hoodie just in time for cooler weather. Good thing too, I'm tired of setting myself on fire!
Brand new, limited edition Halo 3 hoodie from Ecko makes a great gift for your favorite gamer. Color-blocked hoodie is zip-front with nylon welt pockets and nylon overlay over fleece. Velcro(R) close hood with self-welt pockets, rib knit sleeve cuffs and hem.
I, for one, would wear the hell outta that thing. And I'm not just saying that cause it'll compliment my cardboard Halo arsenal so nicely, but that's part of it. *pew pew* *bang bang* *rat-a-tat-tat!* What do you mean I can't get on the bus like this?! Mr. Driver -- PREPARE TO BE BAGGED!
Product Site
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halo odst hoodie protects against cold, not orbital drops [technabob]
Sep 24 2009 Geometric Cans Look Cool, Prevent Rolling
Conceptualized by Dzmitry Samal, these new Coca-Cola cans would be manufactured using impact extrusion and not roll off the counter should one fall over. But I've got news for you: if you knock a Coke can over you've got bigger problems than whether it's rolling. Namely, you're losing valuable mixer. You see, I'm an alcoholic. I kid, I kid -- I don't use mixers.
Sep 23 2009 Beautiful Shot Of The Pinwheel Galaxy
The Pinwheel Galaxy (higher res version HERE) got its name because it looks like a pinwheel. Geez, it doesn't take a rocket surgeon to figure that one out. Or maybe it's cause it loves Little Debbie Pecan Spinwheels so much. Well guess what -- so do I! And Starcrunches? Don't even get me started!!
This new three-color composite image was captured by the Isaac Newton Telescope in La Palma, Spain.
Known more officially as Messier 101 or NGC 5457, this classic spiral galaxy is 27 million light years from Earth in the Ursa Major constellation, also known as the Big Dipper. Its slight asymmetry is thought to be the result of an encounter with another galaxy in the recent (astronomically speaking) past. This event also left many huge clouds of glowing gas and plasma known as H II regions.Though the galaxy, which measures 170,000 light-years across, is visible with the naked eye as a fuzzy spot, large telescopes are needed to see any detail.
You know what I love most about outerspace? I heard it's super quiet. What do you mean, "space is a vacuum"? Those things are loud as shit!
Sep 23 2009 Sure, Why Not?: Neon Tetris On Skateboards
This is a video of 36 skateboarders playing a game of human Tetris on some hill in San Francisco while wearing giant neon shapes on their heads. Except it's not actually Tetris because not all of them are rocking tetrominoes. No, some of those mothers got damn pentominos on their heads. And I'm not talking the little red bits in olives! But, damnit, now I want olives. Shit, and some artichoke hearts. Fun fact: Jesus once turned an olive branch into a magic wand and banished hate from an evil sorcerer's heart. Then he did the water into wine thing and everybody had a good time. Plus, there was live music. You can't beat that.
Thanks to Duncan, who once tried playing Frogger on a skateboard and lost.
Sep 23 2009 Help A Brother Out: Geekologie Reader Seeks Manufacturer For Gaming-Inspired Furniture
Loyal Geekologie Reader (or giant liar) Kristian Aus is an Australian designer currently seeking a manufacturer for some of his video game inspired furniture. This is a stool inspired by the Pac-Man ghosts, and there's a Space Invaders table after the jump. Good looking, Kristian. I like how the designs are obviously inspired by the games but not so much to warrant paying royalties. So yeah, contact Kristian through his website if you're into molded plastics. But if you're into molded sandwiches, you gotta check out the fridge. That ham and cheese looks hairy! $1 if you take a bite.
Hit the jump for the Space Invaders coffee table.
Sep 23 2009 I Want To Ride One Into Battle: Coyotes And Wolves Are Breeding, Creating 'Coywolfs'
Seen here sulking because his likeness didn't make the Three Coywolf t-shirt, is a coyote/wolf hybrid. Personally, I would have named them wolfoties, but that's because I'm awesome. Oh, wait, per Wikipedia: "Where the cross-breeding of animals is concerned, the father's species gives the first part of the offspring's name." I don't know if that has any bearing on this or not, but I'm trying to be scientific (look at my lab coat!).
New DNA evidence reveals that coyotes have bred with wolves in the the northeastern United States, turning mice-eating coyotes into much larger animals with a hunger for big prey, such as deer.
The resulting "coywolves" may, however, benefit ecosystems, since they appear to be filling niches once occupied by wolves that were eradicated by humans.Given where these animals came from and the degree of documented genetic diversity, the researchers can tell that a few coyote females mated with male wolves north of the Great Lakes.
BOOYA -- WHO WAS RIGHT!? I just thought they should be wolfoties because it sounds sweeter, but now there's actual reason! God, am I good or what? Just saying, I also name babies. And that tune.
Coyote + wolf = new breed of predator [msnbc]
Thanks to fdsy, who breeds lion/panther hybrids and makes really cool armor for them.
Sep 23 2009 Yikes!: Pee Wee's Playhouse Action Figures
Just looking at this $140 set of action figures makes me question what the hell my parents were thinking letting me watch such a wack-ass program as a child (I suspect they were thinking "booze time!"). I mean, it's pretty amazing I still turned out alright. Somebody, anybody, back me up here.
The 80's classic Pee-Wee's Playhouse is back with this line of action figures. The case of 14 pieces includes the following characters: 6x Pee Wee Herman, 3x Cowboy Curtis, 3x Miss Yvonne, 1x Pterri, and 1x Puppetland (Subject to change). These figures are highly detailed and must have for any Pee-Wee fan. Comes in retro-packaging to further the retro feel.Wait, what? What the hell am I gonna do with 6 damn Pee Wee Herman dolls? 3 gay Cowboy Curtises, sure (I can't quit you!), but six Pee Wees? No thanks. Also, you notice Pee Wee's hand there on the left? Not a coincidence.
Product Site
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Pee Wee's Playhouse Action Figure Case [walyou]
Sep 23 2009 Wow: AT&T Predicted The Future In 1993
This is a montage of AT&T commercials from 1993 that basically predict the future with 100% accuracy. Now I'm not suggesting somebody at AT&T ripped the space-time continuum, BUT THEN WHERE DID THIS FLYING DELOREAN COME FROM?! AT&T, you have some splainin' to do. GIMME THE SPORTS ALMANAC!
Thanks to K.T., who is going places roads aren't needed.
Sep 23 2009 You've Got To Be Kidding Me: Laptop Burka
Hot on the heel's of last year's highly lucrative Laptop Poncho comes this Laptop Burka. What is a Laptop Burka? A $17 sheet you put over your head while computing outdoors to prevent sun glare.
The new Laptop Burka lets you work and play on your laptop without the glare of sunlight or stares from uninvited strangers. Laptop Burka lets you work or watch movies in your own portable private space, and its made from high-quality, breathable, lightweight fabric. Take it anywhere, anytime. No more eye straining or battery draining from glare. Take your Laptop Burka to the pool ... the patio ... the park ... ANYWHERE!!
Just look at the guy in the picture. Do you really want to be that guy? If you answered, "damn yeah!", high five -- so do I! I just wish they came in pink :(
Product Site
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'Laptop Burka' may be the most useless product ever [dvice]
Sep 23 2009 R2-D2, Gaming Droid Has Eight Consoles Packed Inside His Tummy, Head Projector
Popular Science reader Brian De Vitis (truth in Brian) went and stuffed eight different gaming consoles into a life-size model of R2-D2. Can you name all of them? Because I can. I'm just not going to because I don't feel like it. SO THERE. I love wire tangles!
Hit the jump for a shot of R2's insides. Also, first one to name all eight systems doesn't win a prize. These are not the consoles you're looking for!
Continue Reading " R2-D2, Gaming Droid Has Eight Consoles Packed Inside His Tummy, Head Projector "
Sep 22 2009 Coppers Stop To Play Wii During Drug Bust
Admittedly, Wii Bowling is pretty addictive, but I sure as hell wouldn't stop to play some if I was a drug task force member in the middle of a bust. I'd be too busy stuffing a duffel bag full of free drugs!
With guns drawn and flashlights cutting through darkened rooms, Polk County undercover drug investigators stormed the home of convicted drug dealer Michael Difalco near Lakeland in March.
As investigators searched the home for drugs, some drug task force members found other ways to occupy their time. Within 20 minutes of entering Difalco's house, some of the investigators found a Wii video bowling game and began bowling frame after frame.While some detectives hauled out evidence such as flat screen televisions and shotguns, others threw strikes, gutter balls and worked on picking up spares.
"It was an expansive scene, a lot of searching to be done, a lot of waiting," Boatner said.
The raid cost taxpayers more than $4,000.
Wow, I don't even know what to say. Except I call next! OOH OOH -- let's tape somebody's pistol to the Wiimote first! Come on, I'll let you tase me if I bowl two strikes.
Polk undercover drug investigators play Wii during raid [tbo]
Thanks to Chip, who wouldn't halt a drug bust for anything short of a full-fledged LAN party.
Sep 22 2009 Crazy $80,000 Projection Pool Table System
This is a projection system designed to work with a pool table that creates all sorts of crazy animations while you're trying to sink your balls. I want one pretty badly, but not $80K badly. It doesn't even come with a table!
In addition to this setup, where the balls reveal an image hidden underneath, you can also set it up to have flames track behind the balls, or water that ripples as the balls pass over it. It's a pretty awesome trick, one that works surprisingly smoothly.
They're working on new software that will make it more useful than flashy, too. Imagine playing pool and having the lines where you should shoot projected down on the table, with a computer doing all the math necessary to show you just where to aim and how hard to hit.
Hell yeah, doing all the math necessary. Where the hell was this system when I was taking geometry? Because my calculator watch didn't do shit. I've been in 11th grade for 13 years!
Obscura CueLight Pool Table Is $200,000 Worth of Fancy [gizmodo]
Thanks trail mix, I love your butterscotch chips!
Sep 22 2009 Toy Teaches Children About Life And Death
Now I'm not saying this is the best way to explain to your daughter what happened to Mr. Fluffernutter, I'm just saying I can't think of a better one. Your parents: be thankful I'm not one of them. EXCEPT I TOTALLY AM. Your other father and I made you!
Thanks to Yopoleo, who made has never run over anything but the time limit when giving an acceptance speech.
Sep 22 2009 Mad Scientist: We'll All Be Immortal Cyborgs In 20 Years. GW: In 19 Years I'm Offing Myself
Some crazy-ass jive talking nutjob (61-year old scientist, Ray Kurzweil) is convinced we'll have the technological capabilities and biological know-how to all be loveless immortal cyborgs within 20 years time. Uh-oh.
He says theoretically, at the rate our understanding is increasing, nanotechnologies capable of replacing many of our vital organs could be available in 20 years time.
Mr Kurzweil calls his theory the Law of Accelerating Returns. Writing in The Sun, Mr Kurzweil said: "I and many other scientists now believe that in around 20 years we will have the means to reprogramme our bodies' stone-age software so we can halt, then reverse, ageing. Then nanotechnology will let us live for ever."If we want to go into virtual-reality mode, nanobots will shut down brain signals and take us wherever we want to go. Virtual sex will become commonplace. And in our daily lives, hologram like figures will pop in our brain to explain what is happening.
First of all, The Sun is not an accredited scientific journal. And secondly, I prefer real sex to virtual reality any day. Trust me, it's not all that (I once tried making out with the television but she only shocked my tongue).
Immortality only 20 years away says scientist [telegraph]
Thanks to greenman and mystrb, who are already gonna live forever through their written words (in bathroom stalls).
Sep 22 2009 I'd Live In It: Homemade Enterprise Galileo 2
Somebody went and built a USS Enterprise Galileo 2 shuttle in their backyard out of particleboard and, well, more particleboard. I would totally live in it too, I don't care if there are a bunch of spiders. Or roly polies! You see, I never had a treehouse growing up, so I'm trying to rekindle my youth. Sure, this technically isn't a treehouse, but it does beat camping out in your uncle's basement under a stained bedsheet draped between two barstools. Ah, the memories. Mostly bad ones.
Hit the jump for some more shots, including the ultra-sweet interior and a link to even more.
Continue Reading " I'd Live In It: Homemade Enterprise Galileo 2 "
Sep 22 2009 Conceptual Oldschool Video Game Shirts
This is a picture of two conceptual video game shirts that Geekologie tipster Jessica sent me. Aaaaand that's all the information we have. Anybody seen these before? Are they being manufactured? Do YOU want to manufacture them? Because if you do I swear I won't tell the original designer or the Pac-Man and Tetris copyright owners. I just want that Pac-Man polo. You know, so I can rock it open all the way down to my belly button. Cause chicks dig outties, am I right? No? How about scars? Okay, what if I had a hairlip? Because I know people. With scissors.
Thanks to Jessica, who has taken a vow of toplessness until she procures these garments. THEY WILL NEVER EXIST!
Sep 22 2009 WoW Freakout Kid Versus Grandmother
This is a video of the infamous WoW freakout kid arguing with his grandmother, who's been sent over to watch him and his brother for the weekend. Now I really wanted to believe that these videos are real, but this one's the nail in the coffin for being fake. And not just because octogenarians are notoriously bad actresses (and will shit themselves on set), but she actually references him trying to jam the tv remote up his ass. Now I know how you're feeling, and yes, it's like Santa isn't real all over again.
Tough Granny Teaches Grandson a Lesson [break]
Thanks to Adam, who plays BINGO with his grandma on Tuesday nights and she always has him sneak a bottle of booze in. Fun lady!
Sep 22 2009 Idiot Moron Uses 600K Text Messages/Month
Some idiot moron, in an effort to become the world's biggest failure at life, used 662,258 text messages on his iPhone in a month. Plus the jerkbag got the 12,301 page itemized bill sent to him, so he doesn't even care about trees. I did the math, and it comes out to sending a text message just about every 4 seconds, all day every day. So I assume there was some sort of automated program involved. Also, a monster douche.
Hit the jump for two videos of the idiot looking at his bill.
Continue Reading " Idiot Moron Uses 600K Text Messages/Month "
Sep 21 2009 The World's Most Expensive Booze (Bottle)
The world's most expensive booze is (and I did absolutely no fact checking about this) is a bottle of Chambord valued at $3.24 million. That's too much.
Donald Edge has created with French company Chambord a £2 million bottle of their liqueur to celebrate the new stage version of Breakfast at Tiffany's.
The iconic Chambord Royal orb bottle, hand-wrought from 18 carat yellow gold, will be encrusted with the finest round pearls, over 1,100 exquisitely cut round and pear shaped diamonds, and a square cut emerald diamond.
So, how much if I just want the booze (I've got plenty of empty two-liters!)? Cause, at least according to the Virginia ABC website, they're selling 750ml bottles for $35.50. That means I can get 91,267 bottles for the exact same price! And you know what? That's exactly what I'm gonna do. Glug till I die, bitches!
Chambord Bottle Worth $2 Million [luxuo]
Thanks to Fran, who drinks unicorn blood out of a jewel-encrusted goblet because he doesn't know they're an endangered species.
Sep 21 2009 Taser Backfire: Man Gets Zapped By Police, Uses His New Found Powers To Run Away
This is a video of some crazy bastard talking nonsense to the police and eventually getting tasered. But, unlike most poor suckers who get zapped, this character uses his new electric power to yell a magical chant, get up, and run for freedom. It works too! Feel free to skip to 2:45 if you just want to see the getaway, but I watched the whole thing because people who ramble nonsense make me feel better about myself. Like anonymously flaming you guys in the comments, but not AS good.
Thanks to Jay and Quark, who have both been tased while reciting the alphabet backwards as part of field sobriety tests AND PASSED. Hardcore!
Sep 21 2009 Sweet Fork Arm: Twisted Disney Princesses
Illustrator Jeffrey Thomas created a bunch of darker images of Disney princesses. They were all created prior to the Marvel buyout, so it's just coincidental they look like comic book heroines. WHICH I HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER TRY. That said, where are a mermaid's privates? And, if they look like Flounder's mouth there, no thanks. Okay, maybe once. Twice. BUT NO MORE THAN THAT. Four times, tops.
Hit the jump for a couple more of my favorites, and a link to the entire gallery.
Continue Reading " Sweet Fork Arm: Twisted Disney Princesses "
Sep 21 2009 Reptilian Crime Fighters: Spiderman Lizards
Apparently Spiderman fans are getting their radioactive panties in a bunch over Agamas, lizards with a coloration that resembles that of the superhero. Best reason ever to get a pet? Probably not.
The vivid red-and-blue colouring is almost uncannily like that of the Marvel superhero, and comic book fans have been flocking to exotic pet shops to snap them up.
Native to Kenya, the rock agama (Agama mwanzae) is unable to throw webs, but can change colour - the brightly coloured males will change brown at night or if frightened. They can also run on their hind legs, and - like Spidey - can scale vertical walls.
As many of you may know, I was an amateur herpetologist in a past life. So I like lizards. BUT NOT TROUSER SNAKES! Not speaking of which, did I ever tell you about the time I put a poison dart frog in my mouth? Because that was the end of that life. The time after I tried stealing a grizzly bear's cub!
Hit the jump for another shot of the red and blue bastard.
Continue Reading " Reptilian Crime Fighters: Spiderman Lizards "
Sep 21 2009 The LEGELLO: A Fully Functional LEGO Cello
Nathan Sawaya, a man best known for building the hell out of things with LEGO blocks, has created a fully functional cello out of the modular plastic bits. No word on what it sounds like, but if I had to guess, I'd say not good. But who am I to judge? I mean, BESIDES BEING THE GREATEST LEGO MASTER EVER?! Just saying, one time I built a Star Wars set and only had a few dozen pieces left over. L3333337!
Hit the jump for several more shots, a time lapse video of the build, and a LEGO guitar, just for the halibut.
Continue Reading " The LEGELLO: A Fully Functional LEGO Cello "
Sep 21 2009 Not For Airline Travel: Ninja Kunai USB Drive
A dangerously metal USB drive shaped like a ninja knife, it just makes sense. The 2GB Ninja Kunai drives cost $125 and are in no way, shape or form safe for airplane travel. Or train. Now that I think about it, I wouldn't even drive anywhere with one. Because I used to keep a little pen knife on my keychain and now I push the gas with a peg. Which brings me to an important point: Pirate for hire. Now I know what you're thinking, and yes, I do bachelor parties.
Ninja Kunai USB Drive: the tech equivalent of getting a foreign language tattoo [engadget]
Thanks to Harrison, who once stabbed a foe with a traditional USB drive and lost all his data.
Sep 21 2009 I Can't Even See The Puck: Trippy Air Hockey
This is video of a Japanese air hockey table (possibly manufactured by Sega) that's designed to give game participants seizures. I couldn't even see the puck most of the time. And not just because I was rolling around on the floor clutching my eyes, but I was. Your mom keeps sending nudey pics!
Hit the jump for two more videos of the table, the first of which has a bunch of fake pucks on the table the whole time, and the second demonstrating the table's variable goal size capabilities.
Continue Reading " I Can't Even See The Puck: Trippy Air Hockey "
Sep 21 2009 Sexy Japanese Lap Pillow Is An Actual Lap
This is a $99 Lap Pillow from Japan that, get this, looks like an actual lap! They come in both black and red skirt options and make a perfect gift for the person in your life that has everything but sexual relations with real people.
This pillow is skin-coloured polyurethene calves folded under soft thighs, a comfy cushion for napping, reading, or watching television.
And that's ALL they're good for, okay? Napping. Reading. Watching television. No funny business -- this includes prop comedy. Wocka wocka wocka!
Thanks to Claytron, who is holding out for chest pillows which, actually, probably already exist.
Sep 20 2009 Meat Baby: A Modern Hansel And Gretel Story
Somebody went and made a baby entirely out of ground beef. Which, funny story: is exactly how God made Adam. Minus the pickle eyes. He used deviled eggs, silly! Can you tell I took a religion class in college? Because I didn't. I did take a philosophy class though -- it was called Morality and Ethics. Yeah, I found out I don't have any (I stole an exam and got expelled).
The Meat Baby [thisiswhyyourefat]
Thanks to Tydal and trishna87, who only eat candy babies.
Sep 20 2009 Reusable Pokémon Woman Pad Thingies
I don't even know what to say except WTF, HORF and I would totally tape that to my head like a do-rag. Available for $8 on Etsy, this reusable menstrual pad (I can't believe I'm typing this) is perfect for the Pokémon-loving, environmentally friendly chick with unshaven pits in your life. Not bleach safe or for human consumption. Really?! THEN WHY DID I JUST EAT ONE? Wait, why did I just eat one? My stomach: pump it. The contents: gotta catch 'em all!
Pokémon Menstrual Pad, Yours for Eight Bucks [kotaku]
Thanks to Aisha, I think.
Sep 20 2009 Good Lookin': Kiasaurus Spotted At Walmart
So I got so drunk last night I woke up this morning and didn't even know I was the Geekologie Writer. Also, I think I pissed the bed but I'm too afraid to smell it. But that's neither here nor there, what is here is this Kia Stegosaurus spotted at Wal-Mart (three Wal-Mart automotive posts in a week, I blow goats love dinos!) I'll lay off them, I swear. Seriously though, is this not the most beautiful automobile you've ever seen? Because I would 115% rear-end the hell out of that sucker. IM IN UR TAILPIPE VOIDIN UR WARRANTY!
StegaCARous [peopleofwalmart]
Thanks to killerabbit, Johannes, Spikey DaPikey, N!9htR3@p3r, TabiCat, Greg and Lizzie, who all agree I would look good in this thing.
Sep 20 2009 Dungeons & Dragons Spellcasting Sodies
Jones Soda, in an attempt to appeal to the pale basement dweller demographic, is releasing a limited edition of Dungeon & Dragons themed sodies ($11 six-packs, $19 12-bangers). And with flavors like Potion of Healing, Sneak Attack, Bigby's Crushing Thirst Destroyer, Dwarven Draught, Illithid Brain Juice and Eldritch Blast, they're sure to quench even the most satanic of thirsts. DEVIL WORSHIPERS! I jest. No I don't. I know you spraypainted that pentagram on the gymnasium! Now, gimme your lunch money before I tell everyone about your level 1 pants dwarf.
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jones-ing for some dungeons & dragons soda [technabob]
