Idiot Moron Falls Into Manhole While Texting

Teenager Alexa Longueira fell into a manhole while texting and walking. And I think we can all agree: under no circumstances should she be granted a license.
She was walking along Victory Boulevard about to read a text message on her girlfriend's cell phone when the sidewalk was suddenly gone.
"Like, there was no warning about a big, open hole," she said.It was a big, open manhole.
Alexa tumbled six feet underground and landed in four inches of raw sewage.
Warning? You don't need a warning IT'S A GIANT HOLE. I bet at least six blind people avoided it that very same day. And what was the other thing? Oh yeah -- I hope Master Splinter and the gang whipped your ass while you were down there.
Texting teen falls into manhole [abclocal]
Thanks to Slopez, who fought off three ninjas and two vikings while sending me this tip via SMS.
-
Well folks, I miraculously survived three days of trying to kill myself with the drink (one more miracle and I'm eligible for sainthood). So here I am -- unrested, unshaven, generally unkempt, and ready to post. I hope you all had a good holiday weekend, it's great to see all... / Continue →
-
That's right, in a bid to be crowned the world's biggest losers, Nick Andes, 29 and Doug Klinger, 30, sent over 217,000 text messages during the month of March. Also, Nick was mistakenly sent a $27K phone bill (which has since been cleared up) for the textacular achievement. ... / Continue →
-
If you want to kill yourself by driving your beautifully rusting 1987 Dodge van off a cliff, make sure you catch enough air to not end up teetering on the edge of a precipice. 34-year-old Daniel J. Lyons and his sweet 1987 Dodge van bounced down the rocky side of the canyon at... / Continue →

