Cell Phone Lighter: For All Your Cancer Needs

The SB6309 Lighter Phone isn't just the best named cellphone ever, it's also the first with a functional cigarette lighter. Brain AND lung cancers in one fell swoop! But seriously, mind if I do a J?
instruction
SB6309 The world's first mobile phone with lighter!
Patent product Gold cigarette lighter
Defend wind,
No gas,
Never blew out
Suit for high altitude areas
Well technically, those weren't instructions. They were, however, convincing. That's right -- you're looking at the first U.S. authorized dealer! Haha, now my garage is on fire.
Lighter phone may be the most dangerous cellphone ever [dvice]
Thanks to FDSY, who once went to a strip club where the strippers dipped their nipples in wax and you were allowed to light your cigarettes off them.
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Apparently laser therapy has been in practice for awhile, but did you know it could help you stop smoking? I didn't. I'm gonna put the pole down forever! Kidding -- I can't quit you! * We highly recommend you stop smoking 1-hour prior to your session. (Not required) * ... / Continue →
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I really don't have too much more information on these except they're USB powered boob burners. I think they cost this much: 1,980円. I dunno, they freaking heat your hoo-hoo's, what more do you want from me? Wait a....also, they're a fire hazard. Yes, very dangerous. Fu... / Continue →
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This $1.50 lighter from DealExtreme is in form factor of a regular sized cigarette and can set stuff on fire. Including, but limited to: cigarettes, spliffs, joints, hair, your sister's Barbies, cologne, fireworks and witches. I jest, there's no such thing as witches. Isn't ... / Continue →

