Jun 23 2009Wine Balls: Not Just For Sommelier Orgies

Tired of drinking wine straight from the bottle? That was rhetorical -- it never gets old. But N2Wine decided to make these Wine Globe systems anyways. Cheers, Jesus. Want to teach me how to fish?
Wine globes are glass containers capable of holding 33 or 70 bottles of wine (depending on the size) that are specifically designed to thwart oxidization, the chemical reaction that ages wine, by preventing any air from entering the system. Instead, the globes vino-filled spheres constantly topped off by "food-grade" nitrogen when liquid levels deplete, essentially freezing wine's flavor in time.
The wine is also under constant water-cooled temperature regulation so that it's served perfectly every time and, obviously, the system can offer more wines by the glass than most restaurants currently offer.
Each globe costs about $1,000 but can be run in line off the same nitrogen tank, making them still not worth it. No, I'll be sticking to my boxed wine, thank you very much. Literally, I glued it myself. Ever played Edward Fortyhands? You should try Bernard Boxarm.
Wine Globes Swap Tastings for Keggers [gizmodo]
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Reader Comments
1. Wang - June 23, 2009 4:40 PM
Nice Balls!!!
http://driftwood-x.mybrute.com
2. Skeps - June 23, 2009 4:46 PM
If someone is going to drop a grand on something that holds wine, doesn't that mean they have enough money to buy real wine? I'm asking because mixing 33 or 70 bottles of wine would be freaking gross unless your buying boxes of wine, in which case you're probably not going to need to keep it "served perfectly every time".
3. Sirus - June 23, 2009 4:48 PM
Can you say King's Cup...?
4. naas - June 23, 2009 4:50 PM
It's full of delicious red drinkable rage mMMmm. It holds 33 to 70 bottles of wine!? The wine rack here only holds 28. It also appears to dispense from its anus, might not fly with wine snobs who have children
5. STOMPY - June 23, 2009 4:50 PM
You're gonna love my nuts!
6. Donovan - June 23, 2009 4:55 PM
they have better and cheaper methods of doing such a thing.
heres a full explanation-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfyzajqVcjw
7. supernova_hq - June 23, 2009 4:58 PM
Is that a zalman heatsink on the front?!?
8. Me - June 23, 2009 4:58 PM
Straight from the bottle? I only drink mine straight from the bag in the 5l box...
9. naas - June 23, 2009 5:00 PM
If you painted a smiley face on the front of it, it looks like some ikea-like robot allowing you to drink from it's wangwang.
It also looks like something Apple would make
10. FDSY - June 23, 2009 5:01 PM
i drink my wine from either
a gold boot
or
from the hollowed out skulls of my enemies
11. Alcamar - June 23, 2009 5:05 PM
Supernova_hq: Glad I'm not the only one who saw that. I assume it's to help keep it chilled?
Here's hoping you don't want some variation in your wine...
12. Leonidas - June 23, 2009 5:19 PM
To add to number 2's comment: decent wine needs to breathe a little, it slowly improves it. The kind of wine that doesn't benefit from aging is not the kind of wine that warrants shelling out $1000 for a fancy test-tube to hold it in.
13. STOMPY - June 23, 2009 5:30 PM
@12
Can't you tell by that nice neony red colour that this is first rate franzia?
14. Leonidas - June 23, 2009 5:35 PM
No. That thing does, however, remind me of a gigantic wine gum. Mmmmmmmmmmm....... yum.
15. Ubu7 - June 23, 2009 5:54 PM
The better (and intended purpose) is to keep the blood of your enemies from coagulating so you can drink it when you need a quick pick-me-up.
"Wine" hahaha, right.
16. Moose Knuckle - June 23, 2009 5:54 PM
Kool-aid man's butt plug spout?
17. King Cam - June 23, 2009 6:01 PM
@ 7 & 11
That's the first thing I thought of when I saw it.
18. Pew³ - June 23, 2009 6:11 PM
@16 This kool-aid man??
http://www.motivationalz.com/pictures/kool_aid_man.jpg
19. luke - June 23, 2009 6:22 PM
http://www.bleurestaurantandwinebar.com/
this rest. in my town has a bar with 19 of these stacked. very impressive and the wine was good too ( i guess consistency is valuble in a wine bar setting)
20. Moose Knuckle - June 23, 2009 6:32 PM
Would you like a cheese ball with your wine ball?
21. Pew³ - June 23, 2009 6:33 PM
No Luke, I am your father.
22. Daisy - June 23, 2009 8:35 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. YOu can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scvene in the movie NEver BAck down where MAx bought Baja a bowling ball with then name MAX etched into it. Baja assumed this was because Max wanted the ball for himself eventually, and she decided to take bowling lessons, to thwart his plan.
23. hrf3420 - June 23, 2009 8:35 PM
YEAH NICE ZALMAN FAN ON THE FRONT YOU FAGGOTS. (PS- CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.)
24. JasonSTL - June 23, 2009 11:31 PM
Why the hell would they make it clear? Wine and light don't mix very well. I have always wanted a wine "kegorator" though. Hmmm.
25. trymion - June 23, 2009 11:46 PM
@23
it's a thermaltake golden orb, not a zalman flower.
you'd have to pay me to accept something with anything thermaltake.
26. hgonc2 - June 24, 2009 1:29 AM
Didn't Utica Club patent a beer ball 20 yrs ago???
27. led panel - June 24, 2009 3:21 AM
I'll be sticking to my boxed wine.
28. Anon - June 24, 2009 3:46 AM
Why would anyone want to stop the aging process. Unless it's boxed wine or wine coolers then generally if it's quality wine, then, the older the better and also the more expensive. Obviously this was created for drunks......who naturally don't care about taste.
29. sobored - June 24, 2009 4:33 AM
I swear to god I am going to get one of these... and put 70 bottles of vodka into it and get a tube going straight to my mouth so I can slurp perfectly cooled vodka and get smashed while I read geekologie
http://gawdimsobored.mybrute.com
30. Jaded Icon - June 24, 2009 7:06 AM
How is this different from my refrigerated box wine? Mmmmmm....box wine.
31. zip - June 24, 2009 7:44 AM
In my life, aging has never been an issue when it comes to wine.
32. Pat - June 24, 2009 9:11 AM
A box of wine is still classier.
33. m0h - June 24, 2009 1:54 PM
Is it just me, or does that look like a health globe from Diablo?
OM NOM NOM
Full Health at the price of being sloshed. I can handle that.
34. Lenny - June 25, 2009 12:19 AM
hahaha thats cool id drink the entire thing for the hell of it AND another one cause i know how to party
35. Quck - June 25, 2009 10:55 AM
looks like the hp bar on diablo 2
36. Darth - June 25, 2009 1:33 PM
If you like to drink a lot of wine then this might be the solution.