Jun 30 2009Meaty: Vegan Vs. Carnivore Support Groups

I was heavily vegetarian for almost four years when I was married (the dark years) and let me tell you: non-dairy cheese turns into hard plastic when baked in a Thanksgiving broccoli casserole. I still served it though. And not a single person tried it. So you know what I did? I killed them all. Softly, with my song. Oh yeah, I strummed that pain.
soyf*ckers anonymous [passiveaggressivenotes]
Thanks to Jeff and Barry, who are in your fridge pilfering your bacon.
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Reader Comments
1. Donnie - June 30, 2009 3:28 PM
EPIC!!!!
2. naas - June 30, 2009 3:28 PM
CARNIVORES!!!!!!!!! FTMFTKAKW AAAAAAAHhhhhhh
3. Charles Bronson - June 30, 2009 3:28 PM
first, loled, zdrowiej !
4. naas - June 30, 2009 3:30 PM
Nobody pilfers the bacon in my fridge except for MEEEEH
5. STOMPY - June 30, 2009 3:32 PM
okay okay, nass... you lost me after FTMF i give, whats teh KAKW?
http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/3863?cat=dinosaurs
6. Rawwwr - June 30, 2009 3:41 PM
Everyone deserves some meat!
http://driftwood-x.mybrute.com
7. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - June 30, 2009 3:55 PM
AWESOME! RAWR!
8. KDOGGG - June 30, 2009 3:57 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Sleepless in seattle when meg Ryan eats tom hanks left foot cause the eifel towers lifts were out of order and everyone knew meg ryan was acually an african cannibal!
9. KDOGGG - June 30, 2009 3:58 PM
Suck it DAISEY!!!!!
10. Timbo - June 30, 2009 3:59 PM
Truer words have never been spoken....
11. Zombeleton - June 30, 2009 4:07 PM
It's good to see ole Grumpy standing up for what he believes in
12. Jerry - June 30, 2009 4:16 PM
You want to know who's a carnivore? My wife! Ha! Zing!
http://bootelicious.mybrute.com
13. STOMPY - June 30, 2009 4:18 PM
@12
That's what she was calling me last night brut-tard..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1Y6PchDYfw
"he's gay, I mean he's gay... he likes men... I mean he takes it up the but, I mean he's blind..." I bet she went home and got drunk after that newscast.
oh ya, almost forgot, this post MEATS my seal of approval...
14. Billy D Williams - June 30, 2009 4:28 PM
This is the least post worthy thing I've ever read. Did the person who wrote that thing about carnivores have mobious syndrome? THEN it would be funny.
15. big jerm - June 30, 2009 5:06 PM
ummm... i'm a vegan, and i find this to be horribly offense- psssh, i couldn't even finish it. meat is delicious.
16. msjessiemeghan - June 30, 2009 5:06 PM
I am vegan...I now run faster, jump higher....OMG I MISS CHEESE KILL ME KNOW
17. boop - June 30, 2009 5:07 PM
best newscaster messup
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2YLmWFsBXg
comment on the hateful man
18. Jeremy - June 30, 2009 5:10 PM
I am a vegetarian so I still eat cheese and eggs every once in a while.
19. Latexxx - June 30, 2009 5:11 PM
only thing full of more win is chuck norris
http://felyouth.mybrute.com
20. Daisy - June 30, 2009 5:37 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly lioke that scene int hemoviwe Never Back Down where Max fell in his mine shaft, and found silver, and then later oil at the bottom of the silver mine. He eventually made a lot of money building a pipeline to the ocean, but had to join a crazy little kid's church to do it.
21. Steph - June 30, 2009 5:39 PM
Hotties call me 631-708-4240 and leave a voice message if I don't answer
22. Tes - June 30, 2009 5:49 PM
Vegan dose not = vegetarian. Fix your post.
23. therush - June 30, 2009 6:21 PM
Holy shit that was the laugh of the day for sure.
#14, I had no idea all meat eaters are born with a congenital neurological disorder. That's weird.
24. Fish Man - June 30, 2009 8:00 PM
epic win
25. naas - June 30, 2009 8:12 PM
@STOMPY I left the building today.... KAKW meant nothing specific other than pressing a few extra keys to emphasize FTMFW
26. bendizle - June 30, 2009 10:39 PM
MEAT EATERS FTW!!!!!
27. Lee - July 1, 2009 7:39 AM
You carnivores are all lower life forms.
28. Gordon "Fücking" Shumway - July 1, 2009 7:47 AM
@27
You won't be saying that when we eat you alive.
29. Jaded Icon - July 1, 2009 7:48 AM
For all of you vegetarians out there...you must be eaten. I know! I'm sorry, but it is the law of nature and the law must be obeyed. NOM NOM NOM.
30. Lee - July 1, 2009 8:00 AM
Well, first, people should realize this is fake. Someone made it for a laugh.
In truth, carnivores would be more likely than a vegetarian to need a support group once they get high cholesterol or a heart disease or something.
Why would a vegan or vegetarian need a support group? More like, they would need a cooking group if they were starting off and wanted to learn some things.
This is just stupid.
And you know, vegan and vegetarian are not the same things.
Most vegans or vegetarians do not shove things down people's throats..
Omnivores just like to provoke vegetarians and vegans because they're juvenile and use the excuse that OMGz LyKE one tyMe I new A vegAn aNd like they ONce tolD me tha EatiN meAt is GrosS, whAt a BitcH theY werE so fRom noW on I eaT meaT In frOnt of ThosE kIndz of ppl beCause I thInK it pisSes thEM oFF..
It doesn't.
And saying you're going to eat someone is just disgusting.
That's not proper social conduct, it's disturbing and someone could honestly sue you for harassment for saying that.
And just so you know, I'm pretty sure in survival mode, there would be hoards of vegans and vegetarians willing to do the same.
31. burntmeleg - July 1, 2009 8:20 AM
I'm a vegan. And as a vegan i'm more likely to have a functioning penis than you. :) Suck it! .... WTF NOT LITTERALLY! GET AWAY FROM THERE!
http://www.goveg.com/impotence.asp
32. L33terThanThou - July 1, 2009 8:47 AM
Ya'll carnivores won't do shit to us veg-heads.
I'll be sure to piss on your grave when you die 5 years before I do.
Nyah-nyah! =P
Have a nice day.
33. L33terThanThou - July 1, 2009 9:02 AM
Oh yeah and vegetarians live longer than vegans usually, too.
wewt!
34. Ollie Williams - July 1, 2009 9:07 AM
@30
"Most vegans or vegetarians do not shove things down people's throats.."
You're absolutely right. Well, except to preach their holier-than-thou rebuttals on a web comments section. Go you.
35. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - July 1, 2009 10:06 AM
30 - I'm sorry, I'm too busy choking on your rhetoric to address you "don't shove things down people's throats" comment....
36. Gordon "Fücking" Shumway - July 1, 2009 12:54 PM
Chili dogs for everyone!
37. Hawk - July 1, 2009 1:03 PM
FUNNY!!
38. msjessiemeghan - July 1, 2009 1:51 PM
I heard...somewhere...and maybe tested.... that vegans taste better than carnivores. You know.....sexually. Scientific FACT.
Just sayin'
39. Lee - July 1, 2009 8:33 PM
@ 34
@ 35
Your meat eating has crumbled your brain! You no longer know the difference between a calm explanation and shoving something down one's throat!
40. Jaded Icon - July 2, 2009 6:47 AM
@ 39
Sooooo, the indignation and prolific guilt that you are caulking up in your speech is not "shoving something down one's throat"? Thank for proving that it does not bother you.
BTW: I don't mind vegetarians, just the ones that are *ssholes.
41. Lee - July 2, 2009 11:44 PM
What indignation and guilt? And how is guilt "shoving something down one's throat"?
My post did not start off: ALL READ THIS AND FOLLOW MY OPINION OR YOU WILL BURN IN HELL FOREVER.
I can't tell you how many omnivores I have come across that will shove their meat-eating in my face hoping to get some sap reaction. It's definitely in the 30's and has happened countless times to other people I know.
I grew up in Buffalo. I am very okay with others eating meat, and know pretty much no other herbivores (aside from some PETA creeps) that have a problem with it.
I was simply spoiling the humor for the kinds of people I dislike - meat-eaters who are assholes.
42. Nick - July 6, 2009 1:35 PM
"I was vegetarian for almost four years when I was married (the dark years) and let me tell you: non-dairy cheese turns into hard plastic when baked in a Thanksgiving broccoli casserole. "
If you were vegetarian you could've just eaten the normal cheese you dumb shit.