Jun 18 2009Gorilla Gets All Stabby At Calgary Zoo
A gorilla at the Calgary Zoo picked up a knife left by one of its keepers and threatened to stab another primate if it didn't reveal the whereabouts of its banana horde. Okay, not really. But it did swing the knife around menacingly. I lie. BITCH I'LL CUT YOU!
"He grabbed the knife exactly in the correct position and he smelled it and looked at it," said Calgarian Joe Scheffler, who was at the zoo with his wife, Heike. "A few seconds later, another gorilla came and he was very interested.
"He tried to get the knife, but the gorilla with the knife lifted the knife for his buddy . . . it seems to me that the gorilla with the knife was a little bit angry and he lifted his hand with the knife."It was just (like) a scene from a crime," added Scheffler, whose wife snapped photos of the incident.
Suddenly, as though it sensed danger, Scheffler said the second gorilla stepped away and the knife-wielding gorilla walked a short distance and placed it on an old chair in the exhibit.
Oh man, animals with weapons. This reminds me of the future!
Gorilla caught holding knife at Calgary Zoo [calgaryherald]
Thanks to Jeremy, who once brought a lightsaber to a knife fight but was disqualified for cheating.
Reader Comments
1. gizmoduck - June 18, 2009 3:37 PM
STAB STAB STAB STAB
2. Scooper - June 18, 2009 3:43 PM
Lmao brilliant
http://x3j-dragonsfury.mybrute.com
3. JK - June 18, 2009 3:43 PM
Hey, wow, no first-tards...Ah shit, MyBrute spam. That's even worse.
4. Gordon "Fücking" Shumway - June 18, 2009 3:46 PM
That was my POT PIE!
5. mister-satan - June 18, 2009 3:51 PM
I live in Calgary.
One time I watched the silverback take a big dump, only to be interrupted halfway through by the baby.
So rather than pinch it off, he just sort of wandered around with poo potato hanging outta his ass.
Which he then sat in. It was pretty great.
6. Oliver - June 18, 2009 3:54 PM
"this reminds me of the future"
hehe awesome
7. Timbo - June 18, 2009 3:58 PM
Planet of the frikken apes!
It's starts with stabbing...
8. naas - June 18, 2009 3:59 PM
@4 no it's not, but pointing a large sharp knife at them is completely acceptable
9. Bing Krosby - June 18, 2009 4:06 PM
He's locked up! The poor bastard is only trying to kill a little time.....
Whittling is a great way of doing that.
10. Biscuit Krumbs - June 18, 2009 4:08 PM
Or.....he's trying to stir a drink.
11. STOMPY - June 18, 2009 4:11 PM
@11
This isn't Golaith's sword. It is his drink stirrer!
12. STOMPY - June 18, 2009 4:15 PM
WARNING:
Don't click on any link with a mybrute.com attached to it. Seems they have been linked to a virus. ITS A TRAP! Agent Mark has verified and code #349295 is being referenced into memory as we speak.
13. catch22 - June 18, 2009 4:21 PM
"furious george..what happened to your beautiful face??!!!??"
14. Daisy - June 18, 2009 4:36 PM
FAKE!!!!!!!!!
Its abviously a photoshop job .... oh fcuk it I really can't be arsed to carry on spouting $hit all day long, I just realised how fcuking sad I am.
15. STOMPY - June 18, 2009 4:41 PM
SPANK!!!!!
Post 15 is a complete spank job... you can tell because the shadows on the name are all wrong. This is like that scene from Iron Eagle where chappy's plane went down and that other kid pops in the tape to listen to his words of advice...
16. Breakup Makeup - June 18, 2009 5:32 PM
that's so disturbing... i wonder where the monkey got that idea from
http://www.breakupmakeup.com
17. Daisy - June 18, 2009 5:45 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a comeplete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max befriended an orangutang and named it clyde. one time some mobsters came to visit Max, and he had clyde dismantle their caddy. Later some loser bikers drove through tar.
18. Anon - June 18, 2009 5:47 PM
I can't decide which is worse... Mybrute spam or break-up make-up spam.
@ 13: You, sir are my new hero.
19. naas - June 18, 2009 6:03 PM
@19 at least the mybrute guys occasionally say something related to what's just been posted. A few of them have one liners, but yes they all define themselves with their douchebag mybrute sigfiles in the end I know. Don't know anything more from the makeup-breakup one for obvious reasons, so I don't even see it.
Nothing's worse than the firstarded, low life losing nobodies who can't bring themselves past the lamest thing
20. zuqo - June 18, 2009 6:35 PM
No Star Wars!?
That's bullshit
21. Terra - June 18, 2009 7:12 PM
Daisy stfu
And whoever desides to leave a knife in an exhibit that happens to have animals with active brains and fingers should be fired then shot...
22. GLADIATOR - June 18, 2009 8:57 PM
And so we witness the beginning ... the eveolution .. of ... the ... planet .. of the apes ...
DUN DUN DA DUNNNNNNN
*
*
*
Come and join the short and easy game mybrute:
http://burpnassker.mybrute.com
The game takes less than 5 minutes to play!
23. led panel - June 18, 2009 9:47 PM
awesome
24. gizmoduck - June 18, 2009 10:35 PM
No Star Trek?!
That's bullshit
25. azalea - June 18, 2009 10:49 PM
Good thing the keeper didn't drop his Uzi.
26. nadalo日本にいます。(also in Japan) - June 18, 2009 11:02 PM
No BladeRunner?!
That's bullshit
27. mez - June 18, 2009 11:13 PM
i live in calgary as well....
its not fake.....funny yes, but not fake....i think i hate fake claimers more than people claiming first......
28. Anthony Alexander - June 19, 2009 12:52 AM
I just saw 2001 a space odyssey for the first time to day. I still fell alseep at the end, but i was sleepy.
29. aj g - June 19, 2009 1:43 AM
The sad part about it is that they are learning from us...
30. kreebilicus - June 19, 2009 4:34 AM
REAL!!!!
This is just like in that film Congo where that ape gets its body all shot with the pew pew gun in the jungle and everbody's like "whoa!", and the apes are like "ooo ooo aargh, i'm dead!' and then all the survivors realise how fragile life is and are glad to have escaped with their lives.
31. yourmotherslover - June 19, 2009 7:35 AM
OMG look at monkey #2's HUGE ROD... and monkey #1 totally has his non-knife-wielding hand on it... they appear to be acting out some kind of violent erotica that they obviously learned from their keeper... makes me sick.. and a little turned on... what?
32. Darth - June 19, 2009 6:17 PM
We're not much different from these primates.The only difference is that we're wearing clothes.
33. Gando - June 19, 2009 6:20 PM
Maybe gorillas are even less annoying than humans are.
34. Froggy - June 19, 2009 11:43 PM
This picture reminds me of the movie "Planet of the Apes" Epic!
35. meowmo - August 28, 2009 7:12 PM
Oh noooooes! i see the future! http://media.animaltalk.us.s3.amazonaws.com/image00326.jpg