May 14 2009We're As Good As Dead!: Boston Dynamics' Latest Robastard Is An Accomplished Climber

MORE: aaaahh, apocalypse, bad bad bad, bad ideas, bad looking, climbing, cut this shit out already, damn, damnit, death and destruction, doomsday, no no no, not good, not smart, robobastards, robotic death army, robots, run for your life!, treehouse, uh-oh, we're all gonna die!, wtf were you thinking?

In Boston Dynamics' unending quest to cut humanity's reign on earth short, the company continues to develop new robotic death machines. In this case, a climber named RiSE (who I have briefly touched on before). As is evident from the video, the apocalyptic bastard makes pretty short work of climbing a telephone pole. So I'm pretty confident it could scurry across the floor, shimmy up my leg, and have my change purse in its razor sharp mandibles before I could utter, "but they just dropped".

RiSE Version 3 Prototype [kodlab]

Thanks to beefytee, Art and biggity2bit, who just informed me we're no longer safe in the tree fort. Quick -- to the zip line!

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1. 1st, 2nd, 3rd Police - May 14, 2009 2:31 PM

FIRST

2. Dinosaur Rex - May 14, 2009 2:36 PM

Uff, good thing that bastard has a string attached to his head.

Don't release it !!!

3. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - May 14, 2009 2:39 PM

Huh, that is a bit creepy...

4. actual size - May 14, 2009 2:39 PM

holy shit! pulley powered robots!

5. Anonymous - May 14, 2009 2:39 PM

Notice how it needs help to climb things. I'm sure that it will eventually become a completely unassisted ClimbBot (as I call them). Until then, we have an advantage to keep them from gaining the high ground: Cut the damn rope!

@1: Notice how I am ignoring your idiotic 'FIRST' post.

6. @ the poiple beofore me - May 14, 2009 2:43 PM

the rope isnt helping, its there if it afalls; and yues i have beendrinkings

7. jimmy - May 14, 2009 2:45 PM

OH SHI-

8. Moose Knuckle - May 14, 2009 2:51 PM

Fine, bring on the robot ragnarok!

See if I give a crap!

9. tistom - May 14, 2009 3:03 PM

We are as good as dead now,,, Why did they have to do that...

10. Daisy - May 14, 2009 3:15 PM

FAKE!!!!

This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max had a party with hookers when his parents went out of town. He makes a ton of money and impresses the Princeton interviewer. Unfortunately his mothers egg is damaged and she can't have any more kids or something.

11. Angel Mass - May 14, 2009 3:38 PM

Turn your computer keyboard into a freaking guitar hero:
http://fretsonfire.sourceforge.net/about/

12. Mark - May 14, 2009 3:51 PM

Is that Screech on the left with the long hair and stop watch?

13. Hannukah Montana - May 14, 2009 4:04 PM

I have this peculiar obsession with four-legged robots. I don't know why but I feel like sticking my oingo-doingo on that mother.

14. Squid - May 14, 2009 4:11 PM

@13: Then you'll LOVE Boston Dynamic's BigDog. Google it for pure robtic love at first sight. Or horror - whatever...

15. STOMPY - May 14, 2009 4:23 PM

@6
No fair... I want to be drinking instead of working and get hungged over like GFS...

And don't worry, if these things start to take over well just build a really tall telephone pole that they can't resist but climb but in actuality its just a wooden lightening rod.... now if zombies learn to climb were effed...

16. Gordon "Fücking" Shumway - May 14, 2009 4:32 PM

@15

I'm working on it little buddy. I'm going home after this post. I'll drink a fifth just for you.

17. Rhialto - May 14, 2009 5:23 PM

This looks very promising to me.It needs be a little more developed and equipped with 2 rocket launchers lol.Well done!

18. Whale Tale - May 14, 2009 6:17 PM

Russian Whale Tails Taking Web By Storm:

http://clipmarks.com/clipmark/22386C1C-019C-4452-841A-4E2388BC9C37/

19. wtf - May 14, 2009 6:26 PM

What happened to the whale tail story??? WTFFFFF???

20. Clamdigger - May 14, 2009 6:28 PM

Save the bacon greese for the pole save yourself ......Wow does that have sexual condintations all over it.....MMMMMMM Where is my drink woman and put some damm bacon on. Giddyup

21. formerly SPELLINGNAZI© - May 14, 2009 6:32 PM

Looks like the sponsors weren't too happy about all the Russian whores...

22. cranktrain - May 14, 2009 6:36 PM

What th-.... Where'd the WHALE TAIL POST GO?!

Laaaaaaame.

24. STOMPY - May 14, 2009 6:51 PM

Ahhh GW.... Pushing the boundaries of what is moral.... Looks like that whale eluded ahab....

25. Clamdigger - May 14, 2009 7:05 PM

Lube up the harpoon.......and hold on for the ride to Davey Jones locker. Whale Lover from way back.

26. MacMaster - May 14, 2009 7:21 PM

Dude, WTF was wrong with whale tails? There wasn't much bad with that post except the really young one, but she was wearing panties.

27. naas - May 14, 2009 7:47 PM

I'm with all of you, WTF happened with the whale tails post. Who it still be up there if it were man ass GW?

Unless some serious legalities took place resulting in putting a hit out on you for posting something you shouldn't have (which of course I understand, I have a webcam & get drunk a lot) - don't post something you're going to remove later on

28. 24-bit whore - May 14, 2009 7:49 PM

"Who tha fùck you talkin to boy"?

-brick vader

29. cranktrain - May 14, 2009 8:02 PM

Technically a whale tail is the underwear riding up above pants... like a g-string. That other stuff was just ass-in-air. And yes, I am an expert on the subject.

30. Pew³ - May 14, 2009 8:03 PM

Speed is ppoor subsittute fo accurancy

31. STOMPY - May 14, 2009 9:42 PM

@30
You got it all wrong, Redbull is a ppoor substitute for speed...

32. STOMPY - May 14, 2009 10:53 PM

I think if you just took a screen shot of the first frame and titled it suprise buttsex you'd have a winning pic on your hands...

33. Beastman AIDS - May 15, 2009 1:11 AM

@20
Condintation? I'm no grammar nazi but I'm calling shenanigans on your made-up word.

34. Gordon "Fücking" Shumway - May 15, 2009 7:31 AM

@ALL

http://englishrussia.com/?p=2449

I found it! ARGH! The sea, she be angry this morning!

35. Jaded Icon - May 15, 2009 7:41 AM

Oh well, climbing trees never really saved you from the chainsaw weilding robots anyway....

36. Clamdigger - May 15, 2009 8:51 AM

@33 Glad to see you still have that red marker handy Mr. Correcto. Now I remember why I killed my 6th grade teacher. CONNOTATIONS Well EXCUUUUUUSE me......... feel free to talk to the other people while I fix another drink.

37. STOMPY - May 15, 2009 9:14 AM

@33
EXCUUUUUUSE? I'm no grammatical robozombie Hitler but I do beleive you have too many u's in your word....

38. Watch-303 - May 15, 2009 9:19 AM

its cool and scary at the same time. also the still frame before you play the video makes it look like the guy is taking a whiz on the wall or pole.

39. STOMPY - May 15, 2009 9:21 AM

Watch-303
please refference comment 32... I think we are on to something here...

41. STOMPY - May 15, 2009 11:04 AM

@GFS
websense says

Content blocked by your organization
Reason: This Websense category is filtered: Buttsex

URL:
http://www.frigginrandom.com/images/surprise-buttsechs/

42. Clamdigger - May 15, 2009 12:29 PM

@37 Yep you are right. to many U's how preceptive of you......but i before e in the word BELIEVE. I didn't realize this was the spelling B site. This is so much fun (and I also know yep is not a word, thanks anyway)

43. Beastman Aids - May 15, 2009 9:27 PM

#42.
"too". And you missed a period on the last sentence.
This is important stuff.

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